0:01 what if I told you that the thing that
0:04 you're desperately chasing the perfect
0:07 body Fame success more money isn't
0:10 actually what you want I have spent 30
0:12 years figuring this out and I'm going to
0:14 save you Decades of time frustration and
0:17 suffering in the next 10 minutes we all
0:19 do this we all tell ourselves I'll be
0:22 happy when I'll be happy when I lose
0:23 weight I'll be happy when I get the
0:25 promotion I'll be happy when I have a
0:27 partner I'll finally be respected when
0:29 I'm successful but here's the truth I
0:31 wish I had have known earlier hi I'm
0:34 Maggie welcome to my channel so this is
0:36 embarrassing to admit but I used to want
0:38 to be famous like I really wanted it
0:40 ever since I was 12 and I had my first
0:43 role in the school play I got attention
0:45 I got accolades and I thought this is
0:48 pretty good I want this and like many
0:50 many actors it came from a deep place of
0:53 unworthiness know like a lot of kids I
0:56 felt overlooked not seen not special and
0:59 so acting gave me that moment of
1:01 attention that moment to shine it was
1:03 something that people said that I was
1:05 good at so I thought to myself in my
1:08 little child brain if I get famous then
1:10 everyone will like me then life will
1:12 work out then I'll be happy I chased
1:15 that dream for years the auditions the
1:17 rejections the small winds always
1:19 thinking the next role would be the one
1:22 that made me feel complete but here's
1:25 what I've learned I'm worthy right now
1:27 and you're worthy right now we're worthy
1:29 because we exist we've all heard the
1:31 Stories the gym carries of the world who
1:34 say that once they became famous they
1:37 felt empty and hollow inside why because
1:39 they chasing the wrong thing they
1:41 weren't actually seeking fame they were
1:45 seeking love validation and acceptance
1:46 things that they could have given
1:48 themselves all along things that I could
1:50 have given myself all along another
1:52 example from my life is that I thought
1:54 that no one would love me unless I was
1:56 thin any relationship that didn't work
1:57 out I would think it was because I
2:00 wasn't thin enough or pretty enough this
2:03 belief controlled every facet of my life
2:05 I was absolutely obsessed with it and
2:08 guess what I did get thin and I did find
2:10 love and now I'm 7 years into that
2:13 relationship with my dream partner who
2:14 was literally everything I've ever
2:17 wanted and as you do when you're in
2:18 relationships sometimes you let yourself
2:20 go a little bit and I gained some weight
2:22 and it still was an obsession in this
2:25 relationship even though I had love do
2:27 have love right now but I had this
2:29 realization what I really wanted wasn't
2:31 the perfect body or the perfect
2:35 relationship what I wanted was my own
2:38 love to feel love for myself to approve
2:41 of myself to deeply accept myself as I
2:44 am no matter what I weigh no matter what
2:47 I look like to be okay no matter what
2:49 and I could have given myself that a
2:53 long time ago as well think about it how
2:55 many times have you chased a goal
2:58 achieved the goal and then felt happy
3:01 for a minute or two
3:03 and then you're on to the next goal then
3:05 you felt that dissatisfaction that itch
3:07 that urge to achieve something else you
3:09 know I work with the elderly I'm a
3:11 podiatrist and most of my patients are
3:14 over 70 a lot of them well over 80 over
3:16 90 and I've even got some over 100 and
3:18 I've been doing this job for over 20
3:20 years and let me tell you that gives you
3:23 a whole new perspective on life I know
3:25 what it looks like to age well I know
3:26 what it looks like to age poorly and I'm
3:28 not talking about looks I'm talking
3:30 about mobility and health I have
3:33 patients in Housing Commission Flats I
3:35 have patients that are in multi-million
3:37 dollar homes overlooking the beach I've
3:39 got patients who spend all of their
3:41 money on lottery tickets and when I ask
3:43 them what are you going to do if you win
3:45 they say what do I need all that money
3:47 for I would just give it to my family so
3:49 they're spending all their pension money
3:51 all their spare money even in this cost
3:55 of living crisis on lottery tickets for
3:57 a dream that they're not even going to
4:00 enjoy because they feel too old to enjoy
4:03 life however I also have some patients
4:06 who are amazing they're so curious they
4:09 got a sparkle in their eye they're so
4:11 fun to be around they got a great sense
4:13 of humor they'll say I look in the
4:15 mirror I don't recognize that old lady
4:18 so I just keep walking you know they
4:21 never stop growing they've got purpose
4:24 whether it's gardening or traveling some
4:26 of them are doing crazy things like I
4:29 had this patient who's like 85 or
4:30 something and she jump jumped out of a
4:33 plane these patients are so inspiring
4:35 there's really something about them they
4:38 tend to be really joyful and really
4:41 content and really accepting and I think
4:43 these patients whether consciously or
4:45 unconsciously they understand something
4:47 crucial and that is we're either
4:50 evolving or devolving but we're never
4:52 staying the same if you're not growing
4:54 and learning and experiencing you are
4:57 dying you're getting smaller your world
4:59 is getting smaller you're stunted no one
5:01 is going to stay the same I had a
5:03 patient the other day who was
5:06 complaining to me about her wrinkles and
5:07 she was
5:10 92 complaining about her wrinkles
5:13 because her 7-year-old daughter-in-law
5:16 has lovely skin and she was envious of
5:18 that skin and wanting to get the $12
5:20 skin care product moisturizer that her
5:23 daughter-in-law has and I'm like you're
5:27 92 I have so many patients who will say
5:30 how old do you think I am this obsession
5:33 with what we look like externally
5:35 doesn't stop unless you choose to stop
5:37 it you want to know what true freedom
5:40 feels like it's when something that used
5:43 to scare you doesn't scare you anymore
5:45 when you can speak in front of people
5:48 without your heart racing when people
5:49 who used to bother you who maybe were
5:51 mean to you or cruel to you when their
5:53 words don't affect you anymore when you
5:56 don't care what people think when you've
5:58 had wounds and triggers that used to
5:59 just set you off when it's like like
6:02 water off a duck's back that's true
6:05 Freedom when you can look in the mirror
6:08 and see your aging face and completely
6:10 accept yourself and love yourself when
6:12 you can look at your middle-aged body
6:14 and go yes my body is changing but I
6:17 still love it when you can walk into a
6:19 party and not be thinking what will
6:22 people think of me but be thinking I'm
6:24 curious who's here who can I meet what
6:27 can I learn today that's what real
6:30 confidence looks like not the fake kind
6:31 when you're seeking validation where
6:33 you're putting photos of yourself on
6:35 Instagram to make it look like you have
6:38 a wonderful life real confidence is when
6:40 external things don't get to you anymore
6:42 where you're not walking around getting
6:44 offended taking things personally or
6:47 being triggered by people no one has
6:49 that power over you I used to
6:51 desperately want to pay off my mortgage
6:53 I still do of course I want to pay off
6:55 my mortgage but I used to think I
6:57 wouldn't feel safe until I paid off my
7:00 mortgage which is 25 years
7:03 and then someone said to me imagine
7:05 having paid off your mortgage and then
7:07 think about finances what comes up for
7:09 you and I'm like oh well I've got to pay
7:11 the rates and I've got to pay the bills
7:13 and I've got to pay the XY Z and what if
7:15 this and what if that and then it became
7:18 very clear to me that my fear was around
7:20 scarcity of there not being enough of
7:22 not being safe but I can give myself
7:24 that feeling of Safety and Security
7:26 right now by trusting that it's a
7:29 benevolent Universe trusting that things
7:32 always work out for me by reframing the
7:34 negative into the positive I'm
7:36 bastardizing this but I think Einstein
7:38 said you need to decide if this universe
7:41 is friendly or not and for a long time I
7:43 thought the universe was not friendly
7:45 but now I truly believe that she is
7:48 benevolent she is always pushing you and
7:50 helping you to grow and to give you the
7:52 things that you say that you want
7:53 however that looks like it may not be
7:55 how you think it should look but that's
7:57 what she's doing I had an experience
7:59 recently with my YouTube channel which I
8:02 really really want to grow I love it so
8:05 much I genuinely love YouTube so now's
8:06 probably a good time to ask you to like
8:07 And subscribe and maybe comment if
8:09 you're enjoying this video but yes
8:11 recently I released a video and it did
8:14 really well it's at 33,000 views which
8:17 is huge for me very very exciting it's
8:19 what I always wanted and then something
8:21 interesting happened fear began to creep
8:24 in a little bit I started to get a
8:26 little worried about the next video what
8:28 if it doesn't do so well what if it was
8:31 a one wonder what if I can't replicate
8:33 that success I had forgotten the whole
8:37 point the whole point is to grow is to
8:40 serve is to evolve it's to add value to
8:42 people through my videos it's not to go
8:44 viral of course I would love my videos
8:47 to do well but keeping it in perspective
8:49 what is the point the point is to make
8:52 videos that help touch move and inspire
8:54 people to help them lead a compassionate
8:57 life a joyful life offering the
8:58 knowledge and wisdom that I've gained
9:01 over my 48 years everyone has something
9:03 to offer everyone has life experience
9:06 there's always something to offer so the
9:09 journey is the destination a lot of
9:11 people say it's not the journey it's the
9:13 destination but a wise teacher of mine
9:16 said the journey is the destination this
9:20 is it this is it not when I get 100,000
9:23 subscribers or not when you know you're
9:26 thin or you're rich or whatever the
9:29 journey is the destination the Joy isn't
9:31 reaching the goal it's the process of
9:33 getting there it's all the little wins
9:36 and victories and struggles along the
9:38 way it's the hero's journey it's when
9:40 you're you take your first step and
9:43 you've got your backpack and then you
9:44 you travel along and there's dragons you
9:46 got to slay and then there's things you
9:51 got to overcome obstacles scary forests
9:54 old man with a crystal ball all these
9:56 things that is the hero's journey and
9:58 that is life the journey is the destination
10:00 destination
10:01 it's not getting to the peak of the
10:03 mountain although that is nice once
10:04 you're there then there's another
10:06 mountain and then there's another
10:07 mountain and then there's another
10:09 Mountain thank God there's another
10:11 Mountain so here's what it took me 30
10:14 years to understand you can have
10:17 everything you want right now because
10:20 everything you think you want is because
10:23 it's going to give you a feeling it's
10:24 going to give you a feeling of being
10:27 loved accepted validated enough approved
10:30 of all the things you're actually
10:31 searching for that feeling and you can
10:34 give yourself that feeling right here
10:37 right now you want to feel worthy give
10:39 yourself permission to feel worthy right
10:41 now and you're so worthy you're so
10:43 worthy you're worthy because you exist
10:46 you're an aspect of God you want to feel
10:49 safe now then choose to feel safe now
10:51 choose to believe that you live in a
10:54 safe benevolent universe that loves you
10:56 you want to feel loved now don't wait
10:59 till you meet that partner love yourself
11:01 now make the choice to love yourself now
11:03 develop a relationship with yourself
11:05 right now we're meant to grow we're
11:07 meant to evolve We're Meant To Dream Big
11:10 Dreams but not because those dreams will
11:13 make us happy it's because the process
11:15 of growing itself is what brings
11:18 fulfillment look at your own life what
11:21 are you waiting for what is the thing
11:23 that you think will make you feel
11:26 complete or whole or happy or content
11:29 and give that to yourself right now the
11:31 choice is yours are you going to wait
11:33 till someday to Feel Complete life is
11:35 not about meeting some magical
11:38 destination it's about growing until we
11:41 take our last breath it's about evolving
11:43 and trying things out and being the best
11:46 we can be you know every time we try
11:48 something new we step out of our comfort
11:51 zone new doors open new opportunities
11:54 appear it is amazing what can happen
11:57 when you get into your discomfort Zone
11:59 it really is a hero's journey I so
12:02 excited by life every year that I look
12:04 back on the last year and think oh God
12:06 that wasn't a good look oh how
12:08 embarrassing that's a good thing that
12:11 shows that I'm now in a position where I
12:13 can do better than I did then and I hope
12:15 to live that way for the rest of my life
12:18 thank you so much for watching much love
