0:02 There is a tendency that I'm seeing more
0:06 often uh in my work as a counselor. It's
0:08 it's concerning. It's this tendency uh
0:11 of having a very very little tolerance
0:13 for how long people are willing to suck
0:16 at something. You know, a very low
0:17 tolerance for how long they're willing
0:21 to kind of struggle and toil and fail in
0:25 their attempt to attain a certain goal.
0:29 So, I make this video because
0:32 it's it's such a concerning
0:34 uh predicament because I want to talk
0:36 about what I think they're losing when
0:40 they forgo that experience of the toil
0:42 and and struggle and failure, but also
0:45 too I want to talk about why I think
0:47 it's so easy to perpetuate and why I so
0:49 fully understand and empathize with
0:52 where they're coming from. Um, so first
0:54 let's start there like looking at
0:56 looking at this situation like trying to
0:58 picture myself as a 15-year-old or
1:02 something being told, "Hey, read
1:03 Catcher in the Rye and I want you to
1:06 write this five paragraph essay on it."
1:08 I certainly can understand being like,
1:11 "Uh, no guy. Why do I want to sit there
1:13 and read this book, Words on a Page,
1:17 boring the piss out of me, and then try
1:19 to sit here in front of a blank page,
1:22 and write five pages worth of of
1:25 material about what I thought on it?
1:30 Yeah, kick rocks. Catchy BTS got me. AI
1:34 exists. Get away from me. I get it. I
1:36 understand where they're coming from,
1:38 right? Same thing with sports. like, why
1:40 would I want to join this team?
1:41 Everybody else is already close-knit.
1:42 They're friends. They've been on this
1:44 team for two years. They're looking at
1:46 me like, "Who's this guy?" And and I
1:48 suck. I'm throwing the ball like an
1:50 absolute idiot. And everybody's looking
1:51 at me and I don't like how this makes me
1:54 feel. Why would I do this when I could
1:55 just go play video games? This is much
1:58 more fun. Why am I going to go talk to
2:00 that girl and try to get a girlfriend
2:01 when I've got a simulated version of
2:03 that right here in my pocket? And
2:05 that'll take care of what I'm looking
2:07 for, at least for now. at least for this
2:10 moment. And that's kind of the issue. We
2:13 are sacrificing a piece of oursel on the
2:15 altar of convenience every time we take
2:17 the counterfeit version. Right? I'm
2:18 going to take counterfeit version. I'm
2:19 going to take counterfeit version.
2:20 That's going to satiate this feeling
2:23 right now.
2:25 And there's a major issue with that
2:27 because we're not even realizing uh that
2:29 we're on a steady diet of this
2:31 counterfeit because we don't
2:33 have enough time away from our phones in
2:37 general to have intentionality to have
2:39 deep insightful thought in our own lives
2:42 pers you know um contemplating what am I
2:44 doing am I is this how I want to do
2:47 things not having any perspective on
2:48 ourselves or our lives because we're
2:51 just in it piece by piece moment by
2:56 Um, and so that's kind of the why I'm
2:57 saying I understand why this is so
3:00 concerning. And social media exacerbates
3:02 and kind of facilitates this environment
3:05 of the perceived of the aesthetic of
3:08 just do the surface level. Just shine
3:10 that surface. Just make it presentable.
3:13 Boom. Just fix it. Quick fix. All about
3:15 the looks.
3:16 That is why I get the concern and I
3:20 empathize with it. But I don't think we
3:25 put so much thought into how deeply uh
3:27 detrimental it is to us. I don't have a
3:29 good word for or understanding of
3:31 exactly what it is we're leaving behind.
3:32 Maybe you do. What we're leaving behind
3:35 when we forgo that that that time of
3:37 toil and struggle.
3:40 But it's like
3:44 when you read that book and you're bored
3:46 and you don't know if you can get to it,
3:47 you're learning something about
3:50 discipline and how you how you push
3:52 yourself and what does motivate you and
3:54 what do you really want out of this
3:55 life? And then you're sitting there with
3:57 the blank page and you're thinking about
3:58 the book and you're actually being
4:01 honest and earnest in your attempt to to
4:02 pull something from who you are and what
4:04 you understand, what you make of this
4:06 place and the words uh that were written
4:08 on the page and you're kind of coming up
4:10 with something brand new with the
4:13 synergy of those two those two concepts
4:15 and you're making something new all your
4:17 own your fresh own ideas on the page.
4:19 There's something so beautiful and
4:22 transcendent and
4:25 improving about that that they're just
4:27 leaving on the table.
4:29 It's like there's this whole garden in
4:32 you that can grow and you can be this
4:35 incredibly enriched person, but the
4:38 soil, the enriched soil that is needed
4:40 for that kind of internal garden only
4:43 comes from that time under tension. It
4:45 only comes from being the new guy in the
4:46 boxing gym who doesn't know how to throw
4:48 a punch and is embarrassed as the guy
4:51 next to him makes the bag sound like
4:53 it's a war zone. You know what I mean?
4:55 There's something in that that you
4:58 learn. And I don't mean just, oh, I'm
4:59 learning the skill of boxing and now I'm
5:02 a better boxer. I mean, why am I
5:03 insecure? Oh, I'm learning about
5:05 brotherhood. I'm learning about
5:08 camaraderie. There's these internal
5:09 things that will happen to you. these
5:13 these things that will happen to you
5:16 uh that pull on all of these existential
5:17 questions left, right, and center, and
5:20 you're going to go, "Wow, I know myself
5:22 so much better." But what in the world
5:24 is AI going to teach you about yourself?
5:26 What in the world is the video game
5:27 going to teach you about yourself? Maybe
5:29 that one has a little bit more merit
5:30 than I'm giving. I'm not a video game
5:32 person, but there's probably more merits
5:34 in the video games. But
5:36 the videos on your phone, what is that
5:39 going to help you with? What's it going
5:41 to give you? Like,
5:46 you know, that's that's true here. I
5:49 don't know. I don't think a whole lot.
5:53 I don't think a whole lot. And I I worry
5:56 about that tendency for kids, younger
5:57 individuals, and even older individuals,
6:01 even myself, to just give up more
6:04 of who we could be,
6:06 uh, and just handing it over to convenience.
6:09 convenience.
6:11 for the perception, for the aesthetic,
6:14 for the sheen on top to just get us to
6:17 the next hit.
6:19 I guess that's just a life dictated by
6:20 dopamine or something, you know? And
6:23 it's not a life I want to live. So,
6:25 I I'm trying to break out of it for
6:27 myself and do more that pushes me out of
6:29 my comfort zone, that teaches me more
6:32 about myself. I don't do enough of it.
6:33 And I'm trying to help with these
6:35 clients to understand the the benefit of
6:38 of that toil.
6:40 Anyway, what what do you guys think
6:41 about that? And what are we leaving
6:43 behind when we say I'm just going to hit
6:45 the convenient button? That was easy.
6:48 You know, what what are we giving up? Curious.
6:50 Curious.
