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Be Direct in English. If You Worry You Sound Rude, Watch This. | Speak Confident English | YouTubeToText
YouTube Transcript: Be Direct in English. If You Worry You Sound Rude, Watch This.
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Core Theme
Effective communication in English requires knowing when to use diplomatic, indirect language and when to employ direct, clear language, especially in urgent situations, to ensure actions are taken and goals are met.
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When something really matters to you,
like something that needs to happen right now, a deadline,
a safety issue, a serious mistake,
the words you use can decide whether people take action or do nothing
at all. And if you've ever tried to be super polite when you've needed something
urgently and then found that nothing happened, nobody did anything,
then you know exactly what I'm talking about.
And if you saw a lesson I did recently, a little part of you might be thinking,
didn't Annemarie just talk about the importance of polite
diplomatic language with subtle English phrases like If I
were you, I wish it were that simple. Suppose we were to,
and you're absolutely right, I did.
Those structures help to soften disagreement,
show empathy and keep conversations respectful even
when opinions differ.
But sometimes softening isn't the right move.
Sometimes you need to be direct, clear and simply obvious.
The truth is sometimes polite or indirect language can cause problems,
especially when time is short.
Decisions matter and someone needs to take action. Now,
ultimately, as a skilled English communicator,
you need to know when and how to use both diplomatic language
and direct language in English.
So how exactly do you say what you need directly,
clearly, and respectfully without sounding too harsh or rude?
And when? How do you know the difference?
That's exactly what we're going to focus on in this lesson today.
You're going to learn how to use specific grammar forms such as
imperatives,
simple statements and modal verbs to give instructions,
set boundaries, meet deadlines,
and keep your work moving forward with clarity and confidence. Now,
before we keep going,
if this lesson already feels like something you need to practice,
not just learn in a video, but actually try in real conversation,
then I want to tell you about the Confident Women community.
It's where women around the world come together to speak English for
real conversation, practice with weekly workshops,
small group discussions, and daily support.
It's a space to stop overthinking and actually start using
English with confidence.
The truth is learning grammar and vocabulary is one thing,
but knowing how to use what you've learned out loud, clearly,
calmly, and without second guessing or doubting yourself,
that takes practice, real speaking practice.
And that's exactly what we do inside the Confident Women Community.
So if you're tired of studying alone or if you're ready for progress that
feels natural and supportive,
I would love for you to join us and you can find out all the
I'll leave a quick link to that in the show notes below.
And now let's get back to the five moments when being direct
isn't just okay, it's actually essential.
Let's start by talking about when to use direct language at work. Again.
Last week we learned that polite indirect language has its place.
It can help you build better relationships,
offer suggestions or share opinions thoughtfully,
but sometimes being super polite and soft isn't enough.
Some situations require immediate clarity,
not diplomacy, because when a message isn't clear,
people don't act, and that can lead to misunderstandings,
mistakes or delays.
So when exactly is it appropriate or even necessary to be direct?
Here are five common workplace scenarios where clear direct language is
the best choice. Number one, emergencies.
I want you to consider this example.
Someone says there's a fire in the building, please exit immediately.
You cannot stay inside. Of course,
this is not the time to be vague or to soften the message. This is about safety,
it's about urgency.
The second situation when we need to be more direct is in giving instructions.
For example, you might say to someone your onsite training begins tomorrow.
In the meantime, wear your safety glasses and follow all the safety rules.
Whether you're training someone new or working with a team,
direct language helps to ensure that everyone knows exactly what to do
and how to do it safely. The third situation is when setting boundaries,
and I want to use this as an example,
I really need to focus on this particular project right now.
So please do not interrupt me unless it's urgent. If you've got questions,
let's set a time to talk after 3:00 PM this afternoon.
This kind of language is clear, respectful, and firm.
It helps others understand your boundaries without guessing and without
misinterpreting your needs.
The fourth situation where we absolutely want to use direct communication is
with communicating deadlines. For example,
please submit the report by Tuesday morning.
We must review it by noon so the marketing team can finalize
the campaign. If it's late, we're going to miss the launch deadline.
And the client's contract includes penalty for delays. In this example,
the direct language emphasizes urgency,
expectations and consequences.
There's absolutely no confusion about the timeline or what is required.
And then finally, the fifth situation is in giving feedback.
For example, there were multiple errors in this sales forecast section,
and as a result, we presented incorrect data to the client.
For future reports,
please make sure to verify all calculations against the source file.
This must be a hundred percent accurate before submission when
it comes to giving feedback. It doesn't have to be harsh,
but it does need to be clear.
When expectations are direct improvement becomes easier.
These are moments where indirect or overly polite language can cause
real problems. Again, in emergencies, giving instructions,
setting boundaries, communicating deadlines,
and giving feedback to make sure the language we use in these
situations is both direct and polite or professional.
English speakers often rely on three powerful tools,
imperatives, simple,
present or past statements and modal verbs.
So let's take a look at how each one works and how you can use them
to communicate directly and politely when you need to.
Now to help you remember these three grammar structures,
I have a simple metaphor that I like to use with each one.
The first is imperatives are like a flashlight.
They shine a clear light on what action needs to happen,
and they indicate, do this now.
Then statements are like a mirror.
They reflect what is true or real right now and they outline
this is the situation. And finally,
modal verbs are like signs. They tell people what is allowed,
what's expected or what's necessary, and they clarify,
you must do this or you can't do that.
So now let's take a closer look at how each one works. First up,
the imperatives are flashlight. As a reminder,
we want to use these when you need someone to act
immediately. In English,
imperatives are sentences that start with a verb and they don't include a
subject, and that's because the subject is understood. It's you.
For example,
email me the report by 5:00 PM Call me when the clients
arrive. Don't reach out to the clients until we have a solution.
Follow the exit signs.
Wear your ID at all times in any of these situations.
If you wanna soften the tone just a little bit, you can add the word. Please,
please cc me in the email. Please remember to send the report.
This imperative structure helps you give clear professional
instructions with no confusion.
Next up are the simple statements that we want to use or the mirror that we have
to describe. Facts, expectations,
or feedback without any emotion or suggestion.
These statements can be both in the simple present or simple past tenses.
And what's important here is that they don't ask, they don't suggest,
and they don't soften. They simply reflect what is true.
For example, the deadline is tomorrow. The app is down.
I'm unavailable on Friday. There were several errors in the last report.
These statements don't tell someone what to do, but they create clarity.
They help others understand the situation or what's expected.
And last up, we have our mods, our signs.
These are words you want to use when you want to express rules,
restrictions, or urgency. Mods are words like, must,
cannot, could, will, would and should.
And these are extremely common in professional English.
So let's take a look at each one starting with must.
This means strong necessity. For example,
we must submit their proposal by 3:00 PM and then can't or
cannot is used to say that something is prohibited.
You can't enter the building without your ID will and won't help
us to indicate certainty.
Your application won't be accepted without the documents.
And then should we use this for strong advice or
soft instruction,
you should double check your data before submitting these
modal verbs help you express importance without sounding rude.
So let's pause here for a moment. I wanna take a moment to practice.
I want you to think back to a situation or a time when
you needed your message to be clear, but it didn't land.
No one took action, no one knew what to do.
When you think back on that situation,
what could you say differently using what you've learned here today?
Could you use one of these structures to be more direct and effective?
As always, doing more than just thinking about it is important.
I want you to write it down,
say it aloud or even share it with me in the comments. Now,
there's one more thing we need to discuss when it comes to direct language in
English. As you know, the grammar structures that we've just practiced,
those imperatives statements and modal verbs help you to be clear.
But how you say those.
Words is just as important as the words themselves.
So here I wanna take a moment to focus on your delivery.
Things like your tone of voice, your body language,
and any other words that you choose to soften or support your message.
These small shifts can make a difference between sounding rude or
overly critical and sounding confident, professional, and clear.
So tip number one, use a calm, steady voice.
That means no raised voice, no nervous energy,
or trying to go too fast and no up speak.
I wanna talk about that last one for a moment because it might be a new word.
Up speak is when your voice rises at the end of a sentence like you're asking
a question, not making a statement. For example,
if I say, you need to send the report by five, listen to that again,
you need to send the report by five.
The words I've just said are ordered in a way that is a statement,
not a question. However,
the rising intonation in my voice at the end makes it sound like
a question or makes it sound like I'm unsure, or perhaps this is an option.
I'm gonna say it one more time. Without rising intonation,
you need to send the report by five.
Do you hear that little rising intonation at the end by five? Again,
that little tiny rise in my intonation is sending a signal of
uncertainty, feeling unsure or questioning.
So the opposite is to have falling intonation,
you need to send the report by five without falling intonation.
I'm indicating certainty, closure,
and I sound confident in what I'm saying. Now,
if this is something that you struggle with, this use of intonation,
especially in high pressure moments, you are absolutely not alone.
Intonation can completely change how your message is received in English.
And this is exactly why. Inside my Fluency School program,
we spend time practicing American intonation patterns in real life
conversations.
And it's something that we also work on regularly inside my Confident Women
community as well,
because it makes a big difference in how confidently you
come across when speaking. Now, if you want more on this,
I do have a lesson I'm gonna share with you as well.
I'll share it in the episode notes below.
The second tip I want you to think about is to watch your body language and your
facial expressions. Even if your words are polite,
crossed arms and a tense face.
And no eye contact can create the wrong impression. So instead,
you wanna keep an open posture, make comfortable eye contact and.
Keep your expression neutral or supportive.
This shows professionalism and respect even while you're being
firm. And finally, tip number three, use softeners when appropriate.
But I say this with caution. Again,
we're working on direct clear language,
but even direct language can benefit from a
small polite phrase. These are all very simple. You could add,
please make sure to remember to and thank you for
or thank you in advance for getting me that report by 5:00 PM
this afternoon. Again,
these simple add-ons help your message to land with a little bit
more warmth while still being very clear.
And now let's bring all of this together in a quick practice.
I want you to think about a situation where you should have used
more direct language,
but at that time you softened your message too much or you weren't
clear enough. Now that you know how to use imperatives,
simple statements and modal verbs, how would you say it differently today?
Again,
I want you to write it down and even say it aloud so you get more comfortable
with these phrases. As always,
you can share your example with me in the comments below.
I would love to see it. With that, thank you so much for joining me today.
As always, if you found this lesson helpful,
I would love for you to follow or subscribe wherever you're watching or
listening from today,
and make sure you share it with someone else who might need it. Thank you again,
and I look forward to seeing you next time.
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