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How Does Your Parent Function Work? | EgoHackers | EgoHackers | YouTubeToText
YouTube Transcript: How Does Your Parent Function Work? | EgoHackers
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Summary
Core Theme
The "Parent" cognitive attitude is characterized by responsibility, caution, and precision, contrasting with the energetic but potentially reckless "Hero." It acts as a balancing force, guiding the more impulsive functions and developing into a source of mature discernment and effective action.
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salutations and greetings ego hackers
welcome to today's video and today we'll
be discussing the second of the eight
cognitive attitudes the parent the
parent is a powerful and insightful
function yet it is very different from
the hero while the hero is confident
Dynamic and often prideful the parent is
cautious Discerning and thorough imagine
the hero and the parent represented as
two different people getting into a
physical altercation with a stranger the
hero's strategy would generally be to
come out arms flailing giving maximum
effort and attack in a blind rage until
the opponent was defeated the parent
however is much more subtle the parent
would take the approach of giving the
least amount of necessary energy in
order to maintain their safety the
parent seeks to conserve their energy in
exchange for precision why is this half
of our functions are optimistic meaning
when we use them they gain US Energy
whereas the other half are pessimistic
when we use them we lose energy as
you've likely guessed the hero is
optimistic and the parent is pessimistic
being pessimistic energy becomes a
limited Source our minds sensing this
limited Supply use the parent carefully
in fact in early life our minds don't
want to use the parent function and this
is a source of immaturity and
irresponsibility within the types the
problem is that the parent can't be on
all the time like the hero can but the
parent as we develop it can become one
of the most efficient and precise
functions in our personality the essence
of the parent function can be
encapsulated in one word and that is
responsibility the parent has to
occasionally step in between the hero
and child who can become optimistically
Reckless when left to their own devices
and provide a challenge to the hero so
that the hero itself can become
responsible the parent is the source of
responsibility in our lives let's talk
about the different manifestations of
the parent as we talked about in the
hero lecture there is a difference
between a cognitive function and a
cognitive attitude think of a cognitive
attitude as a slot that a cord is
plugged into or a lens that a light is
expressed through a cognitive function
however is what is plugged into the slot
not the slot itself a cognitive function
is the light that shines through the
lens this means that though each of us
has one parent function there are eight
different manifestations of the parent
function that correlate with the eight
different cognitive functions there are
eight different flavors of the parent
function the implication of this is that
where you derive your sense of
responsibility it's not necessarily
where someone else deres theirs the
eight parent functions te parent I JS
and injs derive their sense of
responsibility from researching topics
to gather a variety of opinions
systematizing information and sharpening
other people's minds through teaching
and education however istjs and injs
with underdeveloped te parent meaning
they either don't use their te very much
or don't use it well they allow their
hero and child functions to be dominant
injs without te parent are likely to be
selfish entitled to their freedom and
selfish with their mood istjs without te
parent often demand that others always
keep them comfortable and in a good mood
however the mature development of their
te parent allows istjs and injs to
expand their awareness of other people
te parent allows these types to
understand others through understanding
their beliefs they can become proficient
investigators and generally become acute
listeners a mature te parent propels inj
and istjs to gather the highest quality
information possible TI parent estps and
entps derive their sense of
responsibility by committing to accuracy
this includes testing others Arguments
for weaknesses and testing others
characters for hypocrisy
both entps and estps when their TI
parent is developed can see through
others like few people can a developed
TI parent is extremely difficult to fool
estps and entps develop their TI parent
by applying a sharp eye to others
opinions and to things that the estp and
entp believe as well less mature estps
and entps walk around assuming that
other people are wrong and that they are
right this can make them extremely
off-putting however a mature TI parent
is consistently Discerning with their
own thinking maturity allows them to
improve others thinking instead of just
saying you're wrong other estps and
entps may ignore their TI altogether
preferring to become great performers
who get unending attention or people
Pleasers who are just looking for
appreciation these estps and entps have
pushed down their TI parent because they
know that if they said what they
actually thought fewer people would like
them but estps and entps have to
understand one thing the people who will
like you the most are the ones who stick
around after you speak the truth Fe
parent isfjs and INF is derive their
sense of responsibility from
understanding and cultivating the
humanity in others extroverted feeling
parent is aware of others feelings and
what others value Fe is fundamentally
empathy a mature expression of Fe
however does not stop at simply being
aware of how others feel and Effy isn't
just about making others feel better the
highest expression of Effie parent is a
combination of understanding a person in
addition to helping them heal from
whatever pain they have so long as that
person is ready for it a mature Effy
parent learns to hold others pain with
them and with when the time is right
walk them through it isfjs and INFJs
with underdeveloped Effy parent act like
no at alls with their GI child who are
certain that they know what's good for
other people this can take the form of
forcing others to do things that the
isfj or an infj thinks are best for that
person but often this forcing leads to
even more damage a mature Effy parent
Embraces the reality of the complexity
of humanity and Embraces the truth that
they can't help everyone it's okay for
an isfj and infj to admit that don't
know what to do for someone sometimes
holding the space of someone's pain with
them is enough fi parent esfps and enfps
derive their sense of responsibility
from Excavating their own system of
values and building their own moral
philosophy fi parent makes the esfp and
ENFP aware of their own mood and
emotions and enables them to practice
responsible self-care through emotional
maturity emotional sensitivity becomes
the path that either matures the SFP and
ENFP or leads them to an entitled sense of
of
self-worth less mature esfps and enfps
who overemphasize their SE and Ne Heroes
and te Childs overemphasize how other
people think of them they don't actually
have any convictions of their own to
stand on they will trade every ounce of
moral Integrity for status and
reputation in their Social Circles Andor
careers but a mature esfp and ENFP
committing to standing with their values
will sacrifice everything so that their
moral conviction does not dissolve under
the pressure of social Conformity or
personal depravity the Journey of FIP
parent into maturity or stagnating and
immaturity is compelling because
arguably esfps and enfps represent the
two points of human extremes on one side
are the heights of selfishness and
depravity which many esfps and enfps are
on but on the other side is compassion
investment gratitude and forgiveness the
implication is that the maturity of an
esfp and ENFP is vital for the success
of our race any parent infp is an inps
derive their sense of responsibility
from being the Watchers who see things
before they happen mature infps and
intps work tirelessly to create a better
future for others working in education
technology psychology and many other
trades I developed any parent shares
warnings of how to avoid destructive
paths in others Futures while also
showing where the paths that lead to
Prosperity lie undeveloped infps and
intps either get stuck in fantasies or
endless Hedonism that leads to extreme
stagnation these two types can become
some of the most lazy most apathetic
self-indulgent and gluttonous types out
there without maturity I if often
develop a type of authoritarian
superiority complex and intps become
harsh Skeptics who only tear down other
people but a mature infp and a mature
INTP they use their any parent to lead
others out of their destructive ways
they find the paths forward when
everyone else has given up looking and
when these types Embrace their own
responsibilities they will find their
way out of their own destructive habits
as well and I parent ENFJ and entjs
derive their sense of responsibility by
committing to realizing a singular
vision for their own future while infps
and inps focus on giving others a better
future enjs and entjs are always
searching for their future it may seem
selfish that someone's sense of
responsibility comes from building their
own future but the reality is that most
people don't know what they want seeing
the examples of a responsible an i
parent demonstrates to the rest of the
world what is possible for a single
person to achieve less developed enfjs
and entjs are impulsive and don't
account for the consequences of their
actions they may be covertly arrogant
people Pleasers or greedy status-seeking
Achievers lacking any substance purpose
but when these types wrap themselves
into their Vision they become powerful
leaders who Inspire others through the
power of their purpose enfjs and entjs
show us what is possible through the
fire of willpower and the maturity of
careful planning SE parent isfps and
istps derive their sense of
responsibility from a combination of
improving others around them and
excelling at performing their specific
craft mature SC parents make others safe
and comfortable isfps and istps have an
instinctual sense of the competence and
capability of others when they are
mature they strengthen others by
improving their strength and skill with
the careful oversight of Essie
parent less mature Essie parents ignore
the experiences they give to others they
may get caught up in scathing criticism
that damages others instead of healing
them or they may feel themselves above
others without actually being in the
weeds to improve them immature isps and
istps hold others to a much higher
standard than they hold themselves
however when the isfp and istp develop a
responsible SE they become precise
accurate and extremely skilled in their
manipulation of the physical environment
whether it be building houses and fixing
cars leading self-defense classes or
creating art responsible SE parents give
us experiences that no other type can Si
parent esfjs and estjs derive their
sense of responsibility from building up
their own strength responsible esfjs and
estjs build themselves on their
perseverance discipline endurance and
consistency mature SI parents become the
people that everyone can hang on to to
get through the hard times they're
gritty and immovable through their
strength immature esfjs and estjs are
irresponsible with their own experience
they don't have self-discipline and they
let their appetite or their laziness
take them where it wants they don't
tolerate discomfort and are entitled to
gratitude and status from others in
their immaturity and without a sense of
Duty they become useless consumers lost
in the pursuit of their own Comfort
however as the ESFJ and ESTJ embrace the
burden of their Duty and commit to
building up their strength physical
psychological spiritual or otherwise
they expose themselves to discomfort
they seek new experiences that enhance
their skill and build their strength
mature SI parents give their strength to
others often to help them through dark
periods in their lives and the strength
of the ESFJ and ESTJ is often revealed
when no one else was there to get them
through the dark periods in their lives
they're the ones who survived and are
stronger because of it how can I know
for sure if my parent is developed we
deal with the first layer of parent
development in our video on each of the
16 types we will also be dealing with
more cognitive development and
integration in later videos videos but
the core of a developed parent function
is in learning how to parent yourself we
have an entire season dedicated to
exploring how to parent each type and
how each type can parent themselves
there are explicit sections in these
lectures lined out to teach the nuances
of the development of our maturity to
check them out visit season 23 in our
members areas at CS joseph. life/
journeyman there's an in-depth lecture
for each of the 16 types thank you for
watching eackers leave your thoughts and
questions in the comment area below and
we'll see you next time when we discuss
the child function [Music]
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