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Communicate Confidently as an Introvert - Social Skills Tips for Shy People | Explearning Communication and Social Skills | YouTubeToText
YouTube Transcript: Communicate Confidently as an Introvert - Social Skills Tips for Shy People
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Video Transcript
how to get better at conversation and
social interaction
as an introvert
if you want to become a more effective
communicator as a shy person
as a timid person you are absolutely not
not
alone first of all
so many people i chat with tell me how
they really want to be better at
conversation and interacting with people
but they're just too afraid to put
themselves out there
because of the crippling social anxiety
we know by this point
the value of social interaction and how
amazing it feels to have a lively and
meaningful conversation with someone so
the question that we're answering in
this video is not why
we need to be a better communicator but how
how
to be a better communicator specifically
how to be a better communicator as a shy person
person
and sure it does require
some courage on your part but that goes
for extroverts as well no one is a
hundred percent confident a hundred
percent of the time some types of social
interaction and some people we engage
with might leave even the strongest and
most confident communicators shaking
from social anxiety i think we all know
how that's felt today i am sharing four
ways you can improve your communication
skills and have more engaging
conversations with people and yes it's
true that sometimes we might just need
to muster up enough courage to have that
conversation but once you're
communicating it's time to truly
all right for introverts specifically
but also for people who might feel timid
and shy every now and then let's see
what we can do focus on listening
listening is not as scary as speaking
because you're not put on the spot in
the same way but don't undervalue your
role as a listener it's no insignificant responsibility
responsibility
half of communication is good listening
and there is a right way and a wrong way
to listen let's talk about the right way
to listen the right way to listen is to
show interest show that you're engaged
in the conversation and interested in
what the speaker is sharing and what
they have to say
by actively listening what you're doing
is you're nodding you're doing a triple
nod you're leaning in
you're using discourse markers like right
right wow
wow
cool nice hmm
and so forth you get the idea because
that shows that you care what they have
to say and we like it when people show
interest in what we have to say doing
the opposite of that would be the wrong
way to listen so please be mindful and
believe it or not even if you feel like
you're being discreet with that the
speaker will definitely pick up on it
make a mental note and it might
influence future
exchanges you have with them so a good
communicator is also a good listener
right it's not just being able to speak
well but also listen well so as a shy person
person
you might not necessarily want to do the
talking at the beginning of the
conversation and that is fine
so give yourself some time to warm up
listen more than you speak and then once
you're ready once you feel more
comfortable with the person once you've
warmed up to
the setting to the location to the topic
to the person with whom you're
interacting then you can speak but don't
feel the need to jump into conversation
right away and be super talkative right
at the get-go give yourself some time
and give the other person a chance to
speak and as you're warming up in the
meantime you can showcase your
extraordinary listening skills they will
definitely be impressed and moreover
they will notice that you're a great listener
listener
number two build on it all right you
should feel absolutely zero pressure to
come up with a topic of conversation is
it the right topic is it an interesting
topic are they gonna have anything to
say on this topic instead what you can
do is build on what the speaker is
sharing and since you've been listening
so closely and carefully and attentively
you'll be able to ask those follow-up
questions for example if the speaker is
telling you about their new workout you
can follow up by asking how long they've
been consistently training
alternatively you can ask them what
their favorite types of training are the
goal with building on the conversation
is to take the pressure off of you to
come up with a new topic something
exciting and to come up with new
material because there's no need for
that use what you've got use what
they're giving you
meaning ask elaboration questions
clarifying questions follow-up questions
those are great ways to build on the
current topic so again you don't have to
work with any original material if
you're on the topic of working out let's
say maybe that got you thinking about
the great outdoors and now you're on to
a related topic of hiking and other
outdoor activities that you enjoy that's
great be on the lookout for
opportunities like that too and that's also
also
building on the conversation because
it's a related topic right it's a slight
topic switch but it's still related one
of my absolute favorite aspects of
conversation and communication is how
fluid it can be right you just click
with the person and conversation is
flowing it just unfolds naturally it
ebbs and flows and you don't really know
what direction it's going to take you in
it gets pretty magical like that and
then suddenly someone interjects with
how did we get on this topic how did we
get here or what was it that we were
originally talking about sometimes those
moments happen and it's really fun to
really point that out because it's like
well the conversation just takes on a
life of its own that's really especially
true when someone has really good
rapport with the other person and also
when both parties are engaged in the
conversation it just the conversation
takes on a life of its own good stuff
all right number three can you relate
all right this one's good because it
allows you to find common ground is
there anything that the speaker is
sharing that you can relate to do you
have a similar experience a similar
anecdote it's similar funny story to
share with them is there something that
you can share from your own fields of experience
experience insights
insights that
that
might resonate with them as well now it
shouldn't be totally random right try to
find a modicum of similarity in there
because that's really about helping
establish common ground and increasing
the chance of building rapport so if
they're sharing something about their
study abroad year and if you studied
abroad then you can share that
experience alternatively if you didn't
study abroad but you have an interesting
story from your junior year in college
which is the time most people do go
abroad then that's still a great way to
find common ground trying to find some
type of similarities and again this does
not require you to work with new
material or just pull something out of
your hat because you're using what
they're giving you you're using that as guidance
guidance
but you're still adding to the
conversation and you're sharing your own
ideas and experiences and stories and
insights and that my friend what you're
bringing to the table is unique in and
of itself
so it will be interesting
number four express yourself
so we are always communicating even when
we think we're not communicating for
example when we're silent we're
communicating sure we're not using words
per se but
but
silence is communicating something so it
just goes to show that communication is
not just about the words we use right
there's so much that you can say with
your body language your hand gestures
your facial expressions your tone of
voice if you have an expressive face
great keep it up you can use that just
engaging your face
can show that you are paying attention
to the conversation
now if you're not an expressive person
then that might be a good place to start
try to incorporate adding some facial
expressions and hand gestures
to the conversation you can practice
hand gestures practice making facial
expressions in the mirror try to feel
what that feels like if that makes sense
i know we're getting a little meta with
that but
it can even be as simple as a smile
furrowing the brows
raising the eyebrows that's a great
place to start the point is that you can communicate
communicate
through your expressions so that's again
low touch and until you feel confident
and ready to speak and add more to the
conversation you can express yourself
through your hand gestures and your
facial expressions while the person is
speaking or an answer to something that
they ask you or say and then once you
feel more confident and ready and warmed
up you can add
words to the nonverbal communication
because this will add that extra
dimension to your message but again no
pressure to dive right into the
conversation and just start talking
talking talking you can still
participate in the conversation in other
ways one of them being with nonverbal communication
communication
so those are strategies to help
introverts become more confident
communicators during social interaction
and this goes for casual conversations
as well as business conversations
honestly even extroverts have days where
they might be feeling shy or timid and
that is okay because nobody is 100
impervious to social anxiety we all have
those moments where social interaction
can feel a little daunting so if you're
an extrovert or ambivert watching this
lesson then these strategies will come
in handy for you too not just the
introverts out there alright so let's
quickly recap one you want to focus on
listening a good communicator is also a
good listener so show interest and be
engaged two you want to build on it so
you're going to ask your follow-up
questions you're going to ask
elaboration questions and clarifying questions
questions
there's no need to bust out new material
just work with what they're saying don't
feel like you need to reinvent the wheel
right that is not necessary whatsoever
you can still participate in
conversation and be engaged by just
using what they have been giving you
three can you relate
is there a similar experience or story
or anecdote you have to share
you bring fresh insights and new
perspectives to the table making what
you share unique and interesting four
express yourself your body language is
communicating your face is communicating
and if you're expressive with your face
and your hand gestures great job keep it up
up
use that in social interaction and if
you're not then that might be something
to pay attention to particularly if you
feel like you're shy and you don't want
to necessarily
speak at the get-go right you want to
communicate in other ways and that's okay
okay
just start being aware of it and see if
you can incorporate more hand gestures
and facial expressions practice these
strategies and make them your own that
way they will be part of your
communication toolkit and they'll enable
you to participate in conversation even
when you're not up to
speaking or you're not feeling your most
confident in that moment you can still
communicate you can still add value to
the conversation in other ways
all right explorers that is it for me i
hope that you love this lesson let me
know how you liked it which strategies
are your favorite share that in the
comments below what other ways do you
think someone can contribute to the
conversation as a timid shy or
introverted person share that with me
and the exploring community in the
comments down below and if you love this
lesson please be sure to let us know
give it a like share it with friends
and don't forget to subscribe and turn
on those notifications so that you never
miss a beat here at exploring alright i
will see you in the next exploring
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