0:15 hello dear brothers and sisters and
0:19 especially young people it's a joy to be
0:22 able to speak to you this way even
0:24 though I would much rather be there in
0:29 person so these questions that you have
0:33 asked are all very good questions and I
0:36 am especially blessed by the honesty and
0:40 the sincerity that I sense in the
0:42 questions so I thought I would go
0:46 through them one by one and just share a
0:49 few thoughts that the Lord is laid on my heart
0:49 heart
0:53 in response the first one relates to
0:59 social media and its use is it okay to
1:03 use and that sort of thing and I want to
1:06 give you two words regarding social
1:11 media the first is the word master you
1:16 find it in Matthew chapter 6 verse 24
1:21 Matthew 6 verse 24 this is a verse you
1:25 probably know well if you've been in CFC
1:28 even for a short time I'm sure you've
1:33 heard this verse Matthew 6 verse 24 says
1:37 no one can serve two masters for either
1:40 he will hate the one and love the other
1:45 or he will be devoted to one and despise
1:50 the other you cannot serve God and Mammon
1:52 Mammon
1:56 so this word master I think of social
1:59 media in the same category as money
2:07 sports entertainment fame etc and all of
2:10 them I think fall into this category of
2:15 Mammon but it's interesting to note that
2:20 Jesus didn't say you cannot have God and Mammon
2:22 Mammon
2:26 he said you cannot serve God and Mammon
2:29 so the issue with Mammon has to do with
2:35 rulership that means does it control you
2:39 so just like there's nothing inherently
2:44 sinful in money itself the danger with
2:48 money is that it can have power over you
2:50 in the same way there's nothing
2:55 inherently wrong in social media as long
2:57 as what you're looking at or reading is
2:58 not sinful
3:01 the danger in social media is in the
3:04 power that it can have over you
3:08 so if social media is your slave that
3:13 means you have control over it then
3:15 you're putting it to good use just like
3:18 if money is your slave then you're
3:20 putting it to good use
3:23 but if social media is your master that
3:27 means it has control over you and you
3:31 find that you're always responding to
3:34 the pull of social media then you must
3:37 seek to be free from that power just
3:39 like you want to be freed from any thing
3:42 that has power over you except God
3:46 himself I've heard it said that one way
3:51 to know what your Idol is is by looking
3:53 at what is the first thing you think
3:56 about in the morning it's an interesting
3:58 way I don't know if it's entirely
4:02 accurate but I've used that as a test
4:06 for myself so for example as soon as you
4:08 wake up in the morning if you find that
4:11 you're getting on your phone or your
4:15 computer to check social media perhaps
4:18 that is your master
4:20 the second word I want you to think
4:25 about is the word entangled entangled
4:28 that's in second Timothy the first
4:36 Timothy chapter to know this 2nd Timothy
4:49 chapter 2 verse 4 2nd Timothy chapter 2
4:54 verse 4 Paul writes to Timothy who he
4:56 refers to as a young person as a young
5:00 man so there's lots of good advice in
5:02 1st and 2nd Timothy for young people
5:08 sure he says 2nd Timothy 2 verse 4 no
5:12 soldier in active service and tangles
5:16 himself in the affairs of everyday life
5:19 so that he may please the one who
5:23 enlisted him as a soldier so here again
5:27 he's not talking about sinful things
5:31 he's talking about everyday life in the
5:36 affairs of everyday life so it's clear
5:40 that it is possible for normal everyday
5:44 life things to entangle us and social
5:47 media can be like that as well
5:51 um thick tough entanglement like a heavy
5:56 ball and chain attached to your leg if
6:00 you had a heavy ball and chain attached
6:00 to your leg
6:05 you can survive it won't kill you but
6:07 it's going to be very difficult to live
6:10 your life every time you have to get up
6:15 from the chair is very slow if you have
6:17 to go to work it'll take you a long time
6:21 if you have to catch the bus you may
6:23 miss the bus because it'll take you such
6:25 a long time to get on the bus so
6:28 everything is very sluggish and it's the
6:31 same thing spiritually as well
6:34 if the everyday things of life become an
6:36 entanglement that means they're attached
6:40 to you in some way that you can't get
6:43 your mind off of it or you can't stop
6:45 yourself from always checking your phone
6:50 or looking on Facebook or Instagram and
6:52 it's become an entanglement and it will
6:55 slow down your spiritual life
6:59 remember the spiritual life is a race so
7:02 all the more reason that we have no
7:05 attachment nothing that slows us down
7:08 another picture that has helped me is
7:11 think of it like a a bottle of very
7:14 expensive perfume that you have but
7:17 there's a hole at the bottom and over a
7:21 period of time that hole will drain the
7:23 bottle of everything that's in there all
7:28 that precious perfume and think about
7:30 those little moments during the day
7:33 where if you're not careful they can
7:36 become like little holes at the bottom
7:39 of your bottle of perfume and that
7:41 bottle of perfume that you have near
7:44 young people is your time very very very
7:48 precious there's no amount of monetary
7:50 money value that you can put on that
7:54 time that you have and these things
7:58 social media if you're not master over
8:00 them can become like little holes of the
8:03 bottle at the bottom of this precious
8:07 bottle of perfume that you have and one
8:10 day you'll wake up in your 30s or 40s
8:13 and wonder where did all that time go
8:16 through these little holes at the bottom
8:21 drain that time so another one thing you
8:23 can do perhaps I'll be honest I haven't
8:26 done this myself I haven't felt the need
8:29 to do it but I'll just share it as a as
8:31 an advice to consider if you feel like
8:34 you need to do it that is maybe to
8:37 satisfy your own curiosity I've always
8:39 thought about doing it maybe I will do it
8:39 it
8:43 um before you look at on your phone at
8:46 something whether it's Facebook or
8:49 Instagram or whatever start a little
8:52 timer on the phone and then once you're
8:55 done looking at it stop the timer and
8:57 then throughout the day every time you
9:00 go back on Facebook or Twitter or
9:03 Instagram start the timer again and I
9:06 keep track of of it and at the end of
9:09 the day add up the total of all the time
9:12 that you spend you may be surprised how
9:17 much time you actually spent on those
9:19 things that you thought ah I'll just
9:22 check it real quick and those real quick
9:26 moments add up to a lot of time so if
9:29 that helps you consider doing it just as
9:31 an exercise maybe for one day just to
9:33 get a feel for how much time you
9:37 actually spend on social media so I hope
9:40 that answers help and answers that helps
9:43 answer that question a little bit ok the
9:47 second and fifth question in the in the
9:50 order in which they were sent to me
9:53 relate to whether you can use social
9:58 media to find a partner life partner or
10:02 having potentially romantic
10:04 relationships that begin through social
10:08 media the only thing I'll say here is to
10:11 be especially careful of interactions on
10:15 social media because social media allows
10:21 you to develop a personality and a world
10:23 of imagination as it were that is
10:27 artificial because online you can make
10:30 yourself out to be somebody that you're
10:31 not in real life
10:35 and that's that's dangerous ultimately
10:38 God intended for us to be people who
10:40 interact with each other face-to-face
10:44 and even if you're the relationship with
10:47 somebody you end up marrying begins
10:51 long-distance or over social media
10:53 eventually when you get married
10:56 you have to be face to face with that
10:58 person that's how God intended our lives
11:02 to be on this earth so getting too
11:06 caught up with how things are on social
11:10 media or on the internet can not only
11:12 lead you into a lot of temptation and
11:16 sin but it can end up in heartbreak you
11:23 may you may make that online interaction
11:26 to be more than it actually is and more
11:27 than the other person thinks it is in
11:30 your imaginary world could somebody come
11:33 crashing down and I know of people who
11:35 have been deeply hurt by things that
11:40 were just a relation and the interaction
11:46 on online so that is why it's best - the
11:48 best way to know whether you are in that
11:51 safe area is by having people in your
11:54 life who are spiritually minded and have
11:58 your best interests at heart and they
12:02 will speak the truth to you and they can
12:05 guide you in these things if the person
12:08 that you're interacting with on social
12:12 media is not a believer and not somebody
12:14 that you know would be good to be
12:18 married to because they're not really
12:20 interested in spiritual things perhaps
12:23 or for some other reason then you
12:26 ultimately if you pursue anything with
12:29 them even online it's just another form
12:32 of lust and it will never satisfy you
12:35 you will end up being more hurt and
12:39 heartbroken if the person that you're
12:41 interacting with or trying to interact
12:44 with is a believer and is somebody that
12:48 you think you could be married to then
12:50 the best thing you can do is to include
12:53 spiritually minded people like your
12:56 parents or your elders or youth leaders
13:00 in your thoughts and conversations about
13:03 this person so that they can help you see
13:04 see
13:08 if this is healthy and help you move it
13:11 in the right direction so that
13:14 eventually it can become a face-to-face
13:16 thing and eventually if it is God's will
13:19 marriage so think about those things be
13:23 careful of the artificial nature of
13:27 online interactions and it's okay if it
13:31 starts there as long as it's guided by
13:33 spiritually minded people that are that
13:38 God has placed in your life and that it
13:41 ultimately evolves into something that's
13:47 healthy personal and face-to-face the
13:52 third question had to do with mixed
13:55 group chats and if they are healthy and
13:59 advisable also I think there was a
14:01 question about what how to handle a
14:03 situation where an acquaintance or a
14:08 friend keeps trying to develop something
14:11 or interact or ping you with text or
14:16 something like that first of all is with
14:20 regard to mixed group co-ed group chats
14:23 as long as the conversation in those
14:28 chats is not sinful or flirtatious then
14:29 I don't see anything wrong with it
14:33 because for most of us if not all of us
14:38 our school or workplace environments are
14:40 co-ed there are boys and girls men and
14:45 women there and so likewise those group
14:48 chats are okay as long as the content
14:51 and the purpose of that group is not
14:56 sinful or flirtatious in any way if as
14:58 far as how to deal with somebody who
15:02 tries to contact you and is constantly
15:06 trying to draw you or lure you read
15:10 proverbs chapter seven sometime and look
15:14 there on the dangers that are there when
15:16 someone of the opposite sex
15:19 stantly tries to draw you it's a very
15:21 good chapter to read and the warning
15:25 that's there applies today for these
15:29 types of online situations the fourth
15:34 question that was given to me was this
15:37 what was called a dichotomy or a
15:42 separation of how relationships are in
15:44 the workplace in the world and in the
15:48 church where you can feel perhaps that
15:50 in the workplace there's a casual
15:53 friendly atmosphere of interaction
15:56 between the opposite sexes and the
15:59 church may not be that way or may not
16:01 feel that way the first thing I'll say
16:04 is that just because it feels more free
16:05 in the workplace
16:09 doesn't make it better most of the
16:11 so-called freedom in the workplace is
16:14 actually fueled by lust by sexual lust
16:19 that is why the work place is full of
16:22 sexually sinful behavior so much so that
16:25 even the world recognizes it and
16:27 companies have to train their employees
16:31 on how to be appropriate such a thing
16:33 must never even be heard of in the
16:35 church which is why we must be very
16:38 careful but sadly the result of
16:42 Christians seen that apparent freedom in
16:45 the world and trying to bring it into
16:47 the church as well saying that's how it
16:51 should be has resulted in churches also
16:53 becoming like that where there is
16:57 harassment and inappropriate behavior
17:00 within so culture within Christendom and
17:03 that's and must also keep in mind that
17:06 what you think of as a level of comfort
17:10 of interaction between the opposite sex
17:13 may not be a level of comfort that the
17:16 other person of the opposite sex is
17:19 comfortable with and feels free to have
17:22 just because you think it feels free or
17:24 feels comfortable may not be something
17:26 that the other person feels comfortable
17:28 with so it's important for us to find
17:30 that healthy
17:33 that said the other extreme is where
17:37 there is an unhealthy awkwardness
17:40 between boys and girls or men and women
17:43 now some of that is natural there is a
17:49 natural awkwardness or maybe lateral
17:52 carefulness that God has built into us
17:55 for our own protection and the devil is
17:58 keen to rid us of that inhibition
18:01 between men and women and make it so
18:03 free and that you must be careful about
18:07 but there is a healthy balance and a
18:09 verse that has helped me in this regard
18:12 is in 1st Timothy chapter 5 again
18:17 another verse in 1st Timothy or in in
18:19 the letters to Timothy 1st Timothy
18:24 chapter 5 we read in verse 2 Paul tells
18:28 Timothy how to treat the women that are
18:32 his peers because he's a young man and
18:36 so in 1st Timothy 5 verse 2 Paul says
18:39 treat the younger women which is your
18:42 peers Timothy or women that are younger
18:48 than you as sisters in all purity so
18:49 there's two words there that are helpful
18:53 as a guide for us first is the word
18:57 sisters the second is the word purity so
19:00 I think of it like this to treat every
19:03 other young person single person or
19:06 person your age as if they were your
19:08 brother or sister which means that
19:12 you're interacting with them doesn't
19:14 lead you into lustful thoughts about
19:16 them because you would never think a
19:18 lustful thought about your own brother
19:20 or sister and you can do that with
19:24 purity if you had a sister and you're a
19:26 man or a boy and you look at that sister
19:28 there's no lust there you can interact
19:30 with them that way if you're a girl and
19:33 you have a brother you can interact with
19:35 your brother in a way that doesn't lead
19:39 to lust so this is Paul's advice through
19:42 the Holy Spirit to Timothy to seek to live
19:42 live
19:48 this way and so in doing so you can seek
19:51 to have that relationship with boys and
19:53 girls men and women of the opposite sex
19:56 being watchful that it doesn't cross the
19:58 line and you'll know that it's crossed
20:01 the line if you've you feel within you
20:03 if you're honest with yourself a lustful
20:06 fart or some attraction coming into
20:09 place and then you must step back and be
20:12 watchful over that and be aware of that
20:13 because that otherwise that will lead
20:16 you into sin or an unhealthy situation
20:19 and finally I would say ask your youth
20:22 leaders and your elders and your parents
20:25 they're spiritually minded for guidance
20:27 on how to practically live out this
20:31 verse in the context of the church
20:33 setting or even in your school or
20:36 workplaces God will give you wisdom and
20:39 give them wisdom to guide you in that
20:42 this next question has to do with the
20:45 use of social media to vent frustration
20:56 have to be careful about that because if
21:00 you if the sole purpose of posting
21:05 something on Facebook or tweeting about
21:07 something is to vent that frustration
21:11 that's inside it's never healthy if it
21:13 comes out if the purpose of it is to
21:16 just get it off your chest especially if
21:18 you're doing it about somebody else
21:20 where you're speaking about somebody or
21:23 some group of people it would first of
21:26 all be a form of gossip or slander which
21:29 the Bible forbids but as I mentioned
21:32 earlier social media allows you to hide
21:36 behind your phone or your computer and
21:39 speak or act in a way that you would
21:41 never do in person and you must be
21:44 careful about that because there are a
21:48 lot of people who type or post or write
21:51 things that they would never never say
21:53 in person
21:54 and there's something unhealthy about
21:57 that the answer is really in the
22:00 question and that is to meditate much on
22:02 God's love for you I think the question
22:05 specifically pertained to a sense of
22:09 fear of off your leaders or your parents
22:11 or whatever situation you're in the
22:14 authorities that God has placed over you
22:17 meditate much on God's love for you like
22:20 the question said and asked him also as
22:23 God also to show you the genuine love of
22:27 your elders and your godly parents and
22:29 you will find that that perfect love
22:33 casts out fear first John 4 verse 18
22:36 perfect love casts out that fear and
22:38 once that fear is removed because you've
22:42 received God's perfect love you will be
22:46 able to find healthy avenues a healthy
22:50 way to express and to bring come and to
22:54 find healing for that hurt or that
22:56 bitterness that wants to find a route
22:58 and you can deal with it in a healthy
23:02 way instead if you just post about it on
23:05 Facebook or write an email to somebody
23:07 about it it's just a form of gossip
23:11 really it's not only forbidden it will
23:14 also just end up being a weight in your
23:17 soul a heavy weight in your soul that
23:21 will drag you down it's not healthy
23:23 there are healthiest way to deal with
23:26 hurt and offenses is to receive God's
23:29 perfect love to find security and God's
23:33 love for me and allow God's love for
23:35 others around me to flow through me as
23:42 well okay the last question relates to
23:44 again thank you for asking these
23:47 questions I it has been an opportunity
23:51 for me also to search my own heart to
23:54 guard my own heart proverbs 4 verse 23
23:57 guard your heart with all diligence or
23:58 from it
24:01 come this spring's are the issues of
24:03 life guard in your heart so it's been a
24:05 good reminder for me
24:08 to check my own heart as you've as I've
24:10 thought about these questions that you
24:12 asked including this last one which
24:17 relates to how youth leaders can help
24:20 guide and and leaders of children can
24:23 help guide the children and the youth
24:26 and provide a healthier atmosphere or a
24:30 healthy atmosphere and a balanced
24:32 atmosphere for the young people to grow
24:36 I want you to know that for me growing
24:39 up in CFC I had one of the I had
24:42 probably the healthiest atmosphere I
24:43 could think of
24:47 now I didn't realize it at the time and
24:49 it wasn't perfect I don't think anything
24:53 is perfect on this earth but it was much
24:56 healthier than anything else I've seen
24:58 in the world elsewhere that's for sure
25:02 and when I was young a child and a young
25:05 person growing up in the church I'm sure
25:07 they're I I can't remember exactly but
25:09 I'm sure that were thoughts that came
25:12 into my mind little forms of complaints
25:15 perhaps towards my parents or somebody
25:18 else in a church and I made a big deal
25:19 out of it in my mind
25:24 perhaps but when I left home and got to
25:25 see a little bit of what else is there
25:28 in the world I realized what a wonderful
25:31 thing it is to have a New Covenant
25:34 Church where there are brothers and
25:37 sisters that genuinely care for you it
25:39 is a precious thing so I hope you never
25:43 lose sight of it or if you have a hard
25:46 time seeing it I hope that the Lord
25:49 takes you somewhere to see what else is
25:49 out there in the world
25:52 and you recognize it's a precious thing
25:54 to have what you have there in CFC I
26:00 still remember it deeply and fondly and
26:03 very thankful for that and so much so
26:05 that it has become the passion of my
26:08 life in the last 10 years to create the
26:12 same atmosphere the same spirit here in
26:15 Colorado for my children I want them to
26:18 have that same atmosphere
26:21 um for youth leaders one of the things
26:23 that I've tried to do is to build a
26:25 relationship with the young people and
26:28 the children so when you see them let's
26:31 say after the meeting you see them there
26:33 instead of just walking by
26:36 maybe stop and have a conversation with
26:39 one of them or a few of them ask them
26:41 some casual questions about their
26:44 everyday life without super
26:47 spiritualizing it and I know I've fallen
26:49 into that trap a little bit where I
26:51 think everything must have a verse
26:54 attached to it or some sort of super
26:57 spiritual language just talk about
27:00 everyday life find out what their
27:03 interests are and try to establish a
27:07 relationship with them on that topic or
27:12 on that subject and if it's cricket or
27:14 motorcycles or clothes or whatever it
27:20 might be find that that thing that they
27:22 have an interest in if it's not a sinful
27:26 thing obviously and use that as an
27:28 opportunity to develop a relationship
27:32 with them also you could organize games
27:35 or activities for them and play with
27:38 them don't just be the organizer
27:40 get in with them and let ask them if
27:42 they'll let you play with with them as
27:45 part of the game and I think you are
27:47 already doing that you youth leaders so
27:50 continue to do that what it will do is
27:53 it will develop a relationship of trust
27:56 with them where they realize that you're
27:57 not just there to tell them what they
28:00 should do and what they shouldn't do but
28:02 that you're there to listen to them and
28:05 to take an interest in them to love them
28:10 to walk alongside them and that will
28:12 lead them to feel comfortable to open up
28:15 to you about their struggles and about
28:18 their journey and and it'll take time
28:22 but if you invest in then you'll bear it
28:26 will bear rich dividends I can think of
28:29 many older [Music]
28:30 [Music]
28:34 older yelling youth leaders in CFC who
28:36 were there for me when I was grown up
28:39 and very very thankful for them and that
28:42 the Lord used them in my life to sow
28:47 seeds that are bearing fruit now and if
28:50 they and it wasn't always spiritual or
28:53 religious language it was just them
28:57 taking an interest in me and praying for
29:00 me and showing me that they cared about
29:04 me without an agenda so all that to say
29:07 I believe you all there in CFC are doing
29:10 a wonderful work you are ahead of us as
29:14 an example to this day you continue to
29:16 be all of you there and thankful to the
29:20 Lord for you all and I look forward to
29:22 the next time I get to see you all may
29:24 the Lord bless you and encourage you and