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"YoU JUsT doN'T UNdeRStaND EvA" | Scamboli Reviews | YouTubeToText
YouTube Transcript: "YoU JUsT doN'T UNdeRStaND EvA"
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Summary
Core Theme
This content is a highly critical review of the anime Neon Genesis Evangelion, arguing that despite its cult status and perceived depth, the series is ultimately boring, poorly explained, and fails to deliver on its narrative promises, leading to audience disappointment.
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after seeing Evangelion on Toonami hyped
up for years random posters in people's
rooms and even references in movies and
TV shows it gave off the impression of
being this ethereal masterpiece that was
integral to the otaku experience if
you're black you have to watch Friday at
some point if you're white
I don't know pineapple Express and if
you're weave it seemed like you had to
watch Ava
so of course 12 the 14 year old me
wanted to check it out 14 hours and 30
minutes later I was disappointed all I
did every day was [ __ ] piss and [ __ ] in
my shorts and yet I was angry that my
time was wasted valuable [ __ ] piss and
[ __ ] time that I'll never get back
my anger at the show is slowly shifted
that fart-sniffing alius and the
wine-sipping redditors that allowed ever
to give off that impression i'm scam
Bohle and today I'll be talking about
how neon genesis evangelion can
objectively suck my nickels at least in
my opinion you're free to think whatever
you want
if you haven't seen it consider not
watching this video not because of
spoilers or anything but it'll just be
extremely boring if you don't know what
I'm talking about
anyway our star Shinji Ikari a
fourteen-year-old league player who's
forced the pilot mechs in order to
defeat the Angels giant beings from
outer space which are actually derived
from Adam but being responsible for the
second impact you see Adam came from the
white moon so obviously Lilith Adam
sibling came from the black moon anyway
the only time we see Lilith is
underground pierced by the spear of
Longinus but the spear of Longinus is
bad shinji's dad wants to get rid of the
spear of Longinus because it's necessary
to initiate the human instrumentality
project this is all actually foretold in
the prophecy through the Dead Sea
Scrolls my bad did that sound like
gibberish that's what watching the show
felt like because they don't even
attempt to explain any of the terms that
despite being a censor with a little
plot or barely mentioned and when they
are mentioned it's only to say some
vague [ __ ] like yes the vagina is
theorem is nearing completion
what's the human instrumentality project
well I dug through the script and
between episodes 1 through 24 it's only
mentioned five times and we're told on
episode 21 that is meant to harness the
power for God which doesn't even scratch
the surface of what it actually does how
about the lance of laryngitis it's
mentioned once on episode 12 and you see
ray doing something with it so you think
huh and where what that thing does and
it isn't talked about until episode 22
and for all that wait this is what we
learned seal wants it Hikari wants it gone
gone
it destroys eighty fields and it's
hinted at sealing away Lilith
so they hype it up to be this crazy
device that'll change everything and we
discover nothing about it why does he'll
want it where does it come from you get
interested in little concepts like the
instrumentality project or the Angels
just to get absolutely dirty next by the
writers because these mysteries end up
going nowhere it just becomes this
convoluted mess with a ton of questions
and no answers want to know about the
Dead Sea Scrolls no they only mention it
four times in the show when I know what
the black egg is want to know why the
angels are attacking I want to know what
the first impact was you see what this
is knowing oh but you can find that
information online just not in the main
series you see I'd almost created by the
first ancestral race alone extremely
advanced alien civilization that's
responsible for the successful race
actually originated from our men was
sent to earth within the white moon to
fill the world over lilith thrived on
earth accidentally while within the
glass the function is both an egg and a
transportation device for this Willet
Dead Sea Scrolls come in rather than
being a prophecy it's actually an
instruction manual made by the first
history of Longinus is designed to
render one of the seeds of life inactive
in the event and this causes Lilith in
turn to release her offspring Pierce is
a giant being of light is because he
lost control of his s2 engine now if you
wanted to get those answers organically
you'd have to watch six more movies and
sift through the 22 games if you really
want to get a good grasp on the story I
mean a game indie game to stop the
[ __ ] video from getting boring we're
gonna do a little mini game are you
ready so I'm gonna put this ball inside
a copy you have to guess which cup it's
in and if you're wrong well ha ha ha ha ha
duh
okay did you follow that let me know in
the comments I'm obviously not a writer
but a good mystery creates questions
that the audience wants answered and
then answers them it makes you wonder
what's up with the Angels what are the
Dead Sea Scrolls so you keep watching
maybe this is so popular because the
reveal is really cool and then the
reveal never happens you wasted your
time it really alienates the audience
from the jump when you toss around all
these terms and organizations without
even bothering to explain them watch the
movie skim oh just watch the movies I'd
rather deep throat a tactical insertion
the waist even another second
researching naval or first off I'm not
that interested anymore and second the
show is hard to watch because every
episode up until 14 follows the same
exact formula it starts off with either
shinji having daddy issues or the gang
is going through some filler then midway
through an angel attacks and usually
it'll look like team shinji is winning
and suddenly o direct power to right
thrust mam the boosters have been
disabled you get a little montage of
some League of Legends players spamming
racial slurs in chat and now they can't
beat the angel
they spend 15 minutes planning how to
kill it you'll get some occasional
dialogue like don't fret this is all
foretold and the peepee poo-poo complex
to make you feel like the plot is moving
and then wowie-zowie
the new plan works perfectly the first
time you tried it you can tweak the
formula a little bit for example episode
7 everyone's talking at a conference for
10 minutes about this robot everything's
going great and sir our Garen is feeding
keels down bot lane impossible try
calling him and sir we did that and he
told us he wasn't black so they spend
seven more minutes devising a plan
Masato gets sent in there the plan
doesn't work the first time it gets
resolved anyway
it essentially throws a minor twisted in
there to say something about Akari every
episode feels like Bill Murray's
Groundhog Day where it's the same thing
with small delineations you sit here
thinking well when are the angels coming
you see them fine think well when is
this gonna go wrong you effectively
remove any and all suspense especially
because no one important in the series
dies we'll get to that later and this
contributes to what becomes a very
boring show with nothing that really
sticks out to me I will say however I
stopped following to sleep around
episode 14 because the angels appear
less frequently in the show becomes
harder to predict which I can respect however
however
I fell asleep watching this twice since
each episode feels the same the story
carries a feeling of stagnation aside
for Moscow appearing nothing important
actually happens to permanently change
the cast nor the world no one dies and
uncover some major secret that causes a
rift between characters and it stays
that way until the anime ends if you
want to use the it's realistic argument
for the show
someone's got to die when there's robots
killing each other in the middle of the
city right now this guy's sister got
pinned under some rubble oh how
convenient he sat though on fuyutsuki
survived a nuke on episode 18 episode 3
deep and throat are just fine sitting
under a giant mech fight however around
episode 17 I actually started feeling
nervous for a character something about
having him pilot the AVA unnerved me and
by episode 18 his body is snapped in
half against gingy's will it was a
turning point for an even more serious
point in the story unless haha on the
pisode 23 rate dies or if ik and
traumatic death no that's too crazy
unless haha what are the stakes clearly
I'm not supposed to be on the edge of my
seat because I already know no one's
dying I know it's gonna happen every
episode is it the action is that why I'm
supposed to 100 it's cuz this [ __ ] I'm
not gonna read but you --they it
actually affects the psyche of oh oh no
sorry [ __ ] you it's boring and if me
saying your favourite anime is boring
offends you it's time to grow up if
someone said ergo proxy is boring out
say yeah I can see that but you want to
know why actually finished Ergo Proxy
it wasn't this predictable monotonous
grind to finish an Ergo Proxy you
immediately see a mysterious monster
called a proxy you also get a glimpse at
a virus that's causing robots to become
sentient two mysteries these two
mysteries will not only be uncovered in
an extremely satisfying way but we go on
a journey with Brielle to do so and
because the audience is swept along with
her we develop our own questions that we
actively want answered Ava develops a
bunch of questions that not only am I
not invested enough to care about but
ones that they don't answer there's
actual stinks that keep you interested
in Naruto proxy because it's spontaneous
I don't know what's gonna happen every
episode I don't know who's gonna die
whereas Ava is not that however as I
said it did start picking up a round
episode 14 a majority of those foreign
terms I mentioned earlier were actually
used the most in later episodes of the
show is when the plat felt like it was
moving and we'd finally discover
something what's the spirit of lasagna
well we end up getting cocked on last
two episodes and learned absolutely
nothing I'm saving that for later though [Music]
[Music]
hello God oh no no no I'm not God why do
you always do this to me why do you
always take me to the make-a-wish side
you know I shut up shut up shut up let's
just go [Music]
if a bully kicks the [ __ ] out of you
every day doesn't matter if you had a
rough upbringing or he's just young the
guy is still annoying if someone gets on
your nerves because he won't stop
bothering you it doesn't matter if he
has some emotional issues cuz his
parents divorce he's still annoying
right so why is it when it comes to
anime I'm all the Sun supposed to
forgive Shinji for being some easily
manipulated by any little Democrat
because he's just 14 or it's realistic
bottom line is I don't like that's all
that matters oh I'm supposed to pretend
like Oscars the most insufferable red
stain on the show because she's insecure
because she has some issues no the
author has a choice on whether or not to
have these characters realistically yeah
there's people like Shinji out there but
there's also people like Jack Lucas who
made it through the most intense
military training available at age 14 at
17 he stowed away on a ship headed for
Eva Jima on the frontlines and when he
finally arrives he has to storm the
beach without a weapon so obviously he
grabs it off a dead soldier and charges
right in upon joining up at the friendly
team of soldiers he starts getting shot
in boom the first round of his rifle
headshot subdued his second round
however jammed his rifle he picked it up
although soaked in blood and sand in the
confusion he realizes alive grenades
been thrown at his comrades and
immediately hops on top and tells his
home he should take cover it's then that
another grenade flashes past his face so
he grabs that one and throws it under
his body adding to the pile the two
grenades blow up and suddenly his guts
are filled with metal his comrades
finished the battle and come back to
collect his dog tags when they realize
the [ __ ] still alive and still
conscious guy makes a full recovery
thank you this has been story time with
scam boli's point is realistic isn't
always oh oh geez Rick I don't know
about this one
I don't want to pilot the robot and Rick
am I saying Shinji had to be a Jojo
character or big muscle man alpha male
the author could have given Shinji a
myriad of more likeable personality
traits and still had him go through some
inner turmoil Oscar didn't have to be a [ __ ]
[ __ ]
Rey could have been developed a little
more I'd like to see her slowly
developing a sense of self and we only
catch a glimpse of that this is
important because even if someone
actually died I wouldn't give a [ __ ]
it's real hard to build suspense when I
don't even care what happened if Shinji
died well the story goes on if Oscar died
[Music]
if there is heaven I have seen it thank
you God
the only person I was actually scared of
dying off with some minor character who
had no impact on the story aside from
being a plot device for Shinji to storm
off and act all soon Dre again why are
we supposed to like Masato because she's hot
hot
I can't empathize nor can I sympathize
with any of the cast
that's not character development just
now I googled why do people like Ava and
someone said because the characters are
so good he went on to say that these
characters top even Breaking Bad and
that just gave me a hernia I'm gonna
know the difference between Breaking
Bad's cast and Ava's insell Harley and
blow-up doll 1 the blank Abel Walt does
a desperate man on his last leg who will
do anything to make his family's life
easier when he dies even if that means
selling meth and murdering people right
there that motive is enough to sell me
but on top of that his personality is
enjoyable and he makes a series fun to
watch number 2 character development [Music]
[Music] campoli
campoli
that is why I steer editors a fathe
period - you plebeian you see a cliff
exploit the inner workings at the very
fabulous and Breaking Bad you probably
like Walt if not you're at least
intrigued didn't want to see where the
story takes him and that makes you care
when he goes from a loving father to a
psychopathic criminal mastermind you
enjoy seeing hints of his personality
becoming more and more distorted until
in the end he's a completely different
person but really Walt always had that
man inside of him Shinji goes from mega
[ __ ] to mega cook that sometimes acts a
little sassy do we feel like we've grown
with the character no do I like Shinji
enough to even care about his
development no I'm not invested enough
and where the story takes them Oscar
doesn't become less of a [ __ ]
ray doesn't fully develop a sense of
self and so on yet again it feels like
the story is going nowhere are you sick
of watch and ethnics minding their own business
business
god dammit get it introducing dance no
longer will you have to speech your dip
and field get out there and find someone
symbolism is DLC it enhances an already
great story
therefore it's completely irrelevant if
what you're watching is not enjoyable in
any capacity oh my god Shinji curled up
like a fetus inside the AVA that is so
deep that is why Ava is better than
goblin slayer yeah you can gargle a dick
and brush your teeth with my balls
breaking bad was an already thrilling
and entertaining ride but on top of that
it's packed with interesting symbolism
that I didn't even catch on to when
Walter is confronted by his wife about
his second life Walt inches further and
further away from her until finally he
says we're done here
he then proceeds to walk away from her
and sheds his light red shirt for a
darker and more sinister shade a
blood-red this is where Walter leaves
for the rest of the series in Heisenberg
arrives just a shade of red says so much
this symbolism like this make a great
story book no but it's cool to look at
and think huh that was interesting I
don't care that Ava has religious
symbolism that does nothing for me so
don't even try and pulling that [ __ ]
look at modern art look how stupid it
looks but it sounds because
ding-ding-ding symbolism ah this
pineapple symbolizes when I poop that
the poop feels like a spiky ball and
snobs eat that [ __ ] right up just like
Ava symbolism doesn't matter unless the
rest is cool to look at don't get me
wrong if you enjoy the series and
appreciate the symbolism that's totally
understandable and fine but if use that
basically the ending is just 40 minutes
of every character confronting their
insecurities and coming to terms with
the human instrumentality project it
feels like a high school play where they
have to describe everything because
there's not enough time to convey the
emotions of every character I'm just
gonna give you an example did you [ __ ]
your pants no I don't need pull-ups
anymore I'm a big boy now my mommy and
daddy abandoning me doesn't affect me at all
all
did you [ __ ] your pants no did you [ __ ]
your pants
no did you [ __ ] your pants yes mommy and
daddy's divorce does make me [ __ ] my
pants I do need diapies it sounds like
I'm exaggerating but no it's just that
some people tell you is a cinematic
masterpiece and you can believe that
that's fine
but let me tell you why it's horrible as
an ending number one I don't care about
these characters yeah everyone on the
show hates themselves why should I care
Shinji is a nuisance Tosca is just a
menace and so on and it's not like
anyone develops in the end they just
kind of come
terms with themselves and hooray I'm a
[ __ ] yeah but that was pretty
subjective let's say you actually care
about the characters and story we do
learn about the human instrumentality
project yet we don't learn a single
thing about akari's motives while the
project's even happening where the
angels come from why the Angels hate
humans so on and so forth so you've
invested around thirteen and a half
hours into the series hoping praying for
a fulfilling ending that explains what's
going on all to get cut for nearly an hour
hour
it completely deviates from the rest of
the story for what to be artistic to be
deep to make a statement about the human
mind whoo whoo you learned in seventh
grade what makes a story the beginning
rising action the climax and falling
action only there is no climax talen
it's just one long less than mediocre
hand job where you don't even finish
right as you feel it coming he or she
just stops and starts giving you a
the Ava's are so [ __ ] cool first off
the design is rad even 20 years later
when they ever start freaking out and
going berserk everything about it's
unnerving and badass especially when
unit one starts eating an angel there's
a handful of these moments for each one
it's [ __ ] sick speaking of cool
moments any time they use classical
old-school type music was a blast like
when the two ava's are dancing together
to be an angel and let's talk about the
way the anime was edited the whole thing
kind of felt like watching some sort of
war catalog that you're not supposed to
see there's also these long shots of
landscape that give off a vibe I've
never felt in anime I really wish that
modern anime would branch out and
explore different methods of
cinematography like Ava did it really
breathe fresh air into the medium and
provide a massive outlet for creativity
instead of you know dipping into the
story side of things I think it's really
cool that if for some reason you
actually liked it you could spend hours
upon hours dissecting why the author did
certain things and what characters were
thinking and so on even 24 years later
[Music]
so what am I trying to say well just
because a bunch of nerds decide
something's a classic doesn't make it
good have you ever read The Great Gatsby
that [ __ ] [ __ ] sucked even might have
layers and layers of psychological
messages and all that it doesn't make it
fun to watch and if you disagree well
that's just because I have much larger
amounts of brain power than you you
don't got to agree with me I don't care
if I agreed with everything some [ __ ]
on YouTube said I would probably be a
really boring person so if you're mad
that I don't have the same opinion as
you you can go ahead and [ __ ] yourself
however if you just disagree with what I
said or think I'm wrong leave a comment
I probably won't read it but it's cool
to have a discussion don't leave yet
don't leave yet don't [ __ ] leave yet
I'm not finished this video took a
ridiculous amount of time to make and
I'm probably never gonna do something
like this again so if you enjoyed the
video please let me know
likewise if you thought this video was
garbage fun fact I tried to trigger some
Ava fans to use as evidence in this
video but they're actually pretty chill
next week I guess we're doing a manga
manga video very possibly not uploading
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