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TOJI FUSHIGURO: The Cursed Baby Daddy | Cj Dachamp | YouTubeToText
YouTube Transcript: TOJI FUSHIGURO: The Cursed Baby Daddy
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[Music]
I know a lot of guys come on the show
and say they not the baby daddy but no
one in the history of Murray has been
more sure than me that baby look like
you no sir does it look like me m I
don't know how would I
know in the case of 5-year-old megumi
toldi you are the father [Applause]
[Music] [Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
[Music]
all righty ladies and gentlemen welcome
to the shabuya trials why the did I just
say it like that let me start that over
welcome to the shabuya trials where we
will be having not one but two new
Challengers coming to the round table
both Challengers are hiling from a
series that is absolutely popping off
right now and with the new ranking
system we are introducing today these
[ __ ] best bring the heat as they come
to be judged will they make it or will
they utterly [ __ ] fail making his way
to the stand right now Challenger one
coming in at around 6'2 about 200
something PBS of straight raw muscle and
pure ignorance he has already submitted
himself into the Hall of Fame of anime
dead beat dads and he is competing with
Gojo making these hoes fall to their
knees and I'm not joking about this some
of these Twitter hoes need literal help
toii girlo well y'all already know we
got all that evidence is own de and it
is now time to commence the shabuya
trials without further Ado exit [Music]
[Music]
a toi fushi girl where the hell do I
even start know [ __ ] it let's go ahead
and get the egregious [ __ ] out the way
the [ __ ] sold his
son yep we ain't holding nothing back
with this [ __ ] bro said child support F
out of here I ain't paying that [ __ ]
and the thing that makes it worse he
sold the n to the zining clan the clan
that he does not [ __ ] with because they
discriminated against his ass like [ __ ]
selling your son is crazy but n the
first time you even see this [ __ ] BR
bro is out here gambling his
[ __ ] Life Away bro's partner
come up behind him he like ohj what's
going on with your boy I see you out
here gambling your [ __ ] life
away hey [ __ ] you still unemployed man
chill bro you know that unemployment
check be hitting like a [ __ ] and
obviously as we can see bro loses and
his parlay just went to [ __ ] and before
this man leaves he asks toi the question
hey uh how your son doing me me
me yall know who you talking about bro
bro is this [ __ ] serious this
[ __ ] forgot his son's name oh my
God bro holy [ __ ] [ __ ] how the hell you
forget your own son's name it ain't like
you got like 12 [ __ ] kids [ __ ]
you have one son and you forgot that
[ __ ] name dear God Almighty I just want
to hear the call CPS probably got to
[ __ ] hello hello this is CPS Child
Protective Services are we speaking to
Mr fushi guro uh yeah
outstanding okay Mr fushi guro as we see
on our records it seems that um you have
not paid your child support in about 48
months is everything good Mr fushi girl
uh yeah son I don't even know who the
[ __ ] you talking about um sir it clearly
shows that you have a son on the record
oh my God I'm Mr FY girl hello oh Lord
hello oh [ __ ] I got to take a [ __ ] hey
quit being a bum ass
[ __ ] now ladies and gentlemen this man
told you may be walking around and
looking like a bum but I ain't going to
lie this man and smart as hell so he has
to hunt down this little girl named Rico
because she's a star plasma vessel and
she's got Gojo and ghetto protecting her
and obviously that's two special grade
Sorcerers so toi puts a bounty on her
head to make a bunch of dudes come after
her and make Gojo and get to tire out so
toi could basically get the jump on they
ass when they MP Barlo cuz this is not
toi's first running with Gojo bro had to
come prepared because back in the day
toi wanted to go find out what saw the
hype about this little [ __ ] in the Gojo
Clan so toi was behind him trying to get
the scouting report but Gojo's old
little ass turned around and he was like
mommy there's a stalker behind us enemy
spotted this man told you was shook he
was like boy ain't no way I should be
invisible I got active camo equipped but
even though this man had stealth 100 and
no curs energy bro still got spotted so
this man knew I got to Tire him out
before I sneak his ass and what do you
know later on when the mission's almost
complete toldi sneak this [ __ ] bro was
like yeah got your little pretty ass you
know the ho is going to love this but
now I get ends up throwing out one of
his [ __ ] Pokémon looks like bro
summoned the ugly ass oversized Weedle
but toi sliced through this fat ass tape
for him like it was paper and now we get
to observe the first man that this man
cooked Gojo believe it or not this sexy
ass [ __ ] got his ass beat I know all
the hoes on life supports he and Gojo
get his ass whooped so Gojo end up
telling him hey bro the bouny off of her
head bro this man told you told him man
young blood I took that [ __ ]
down cuz I set that [ __ ] oh my God bro
is that Hammer so toi starts moving at
Buck Wild speeds with this freak ass
physicality because of his Heavenly
restriction but this man
go got my face ho ass [ __ ] and he said
this man toldi flying look at the rag
doll physics but this did not stop this
man at all bro is moving like Sonic on
them bouncy ass Springs though Gojo said
to hell with this and just flatten the
entire area thinking he did something
but this man summoned a bunch of nasty
ass mosquitoes looking like it's summer
down here in the [ __ ] Southeast and
uses him as cover to sneak this [ __ ] oh
Lord and this is where all the Gojo
girls want life support he started
stabbing the [ __ ] out of this [ __ ] bro
became Michael Myers then he went for
the legs started fing that [ __ ] then he
hits him with the hell sweep then stabs
him in the head and slams him on the ground
ground
Jesus bro little boy the [ __ ] out of
this [ __ ] if this was any other person
they would be dead but n bro said hit
the [ __ ] weit room weak ass boy so
after toi put this man go on a poster
meanwhile ghetto with Rico and I ain't
so then it starts playing this emotional
last music with her backstory playing in
the background like that ain't a red
flag and she like oh my God you're so
sweet oh I know I am take my hand [Music]
shy you got knocked the [ __ ] out man
give me my Goddamn money this man told
you one pumped the [ __ ] out of this
[ __ ] right in front of this man ghetto
and this man told you was like I ain't
going to lie my boy I was hearing all
that [ __ ] and I just had to stop you
from embarrassing yourself so ghetto got
mad as hel him attack him with another
Pokemon [ __ ] this one look like a VAR n
Gyarados so it ends up slamming him down
into the tombs but the attack did
absolutely nothing to him bro has no
scratches and I ain't going to lie this
next part is nasty as hell so toi starts
explaining how he be moving with no
curse energy and how he be using sneak
100 without being detected and this man
pukes out a cursed spirit that he keeps
inside of his stomach that basically
stores all of his cursed tools so
basically this nigga's inventory is
located in his stomach that's nasty work
but you know what if you really think
about it bro really got a video game
inventory so G sends his big ass cursed
Dragon at him again and starts shooting
these beans at him but he starts quick
stepping them hoes jumps up slices the
dragon in half and he's got this MTO
probably [ __ ] himself cuz he's
Bamboozled he is like how is a measly
monkey doing this right now the why they
on this bridge GTO pulls out his final
attack and this man brings out the slit
mouth woman asking am I pretty with your
ugly ass but toi's like nah beat you
ugly as [ __ ] and slices that
[ __ ] up so didn't toi started
slicing up GTO put the X Mar the spot on
his ass probably gave him the Luffy
chest guard then 7202 kicks the [ __ ] out
this [ __ ] right before the Bridge Falls
and it was over for bro GG's and look at
this disrespectful [ __ ] bro just walked
over to his body and just kicked the
[ __ ] out of his unconscious face bro was
like you ugly as [ __ ] [ __ ] with them
big ass ears shut your trap [ __ ] and
never rise up a [ __ ] again and you know
what's crazy after he finished beating
they ass this ends up jogging his memory
and he's like oh I do have a son really
[ __ ] later on after this toi delivers
old girl's corpse over to the client and
she ends up getting sh it out like cell
shat out 18 and this nasty old ass
looking [ __ ] like yes yes very good
looks like the body's intact and the
[ __ ] is not breathing excellent work
young gentlemen I will be sending you a
myy so while this man told you is
leaving probably going to the dealership
going to buy the Hellcat but he ends up
seeing this man Gojo looking like a
absolute fiend a straight booty Bandit
so obviously toi think he tripping he
like man what the [ __ ] going on sitting
here fantasizing by lay you on your
stomach and tun that big old red ass up
and long that [ __ ] till it's squirting
and far and squirting and far squirting
and this [ __ ] is
crazy so after this man Gojo just
finishes yapping for like five minutes
about some [ __ ] out here explaining
how he survived [ __ ] we get it you're
broken somebody for real need to get the
patch no on this [ __ ] like bro is
actually busted but toldi was like Ah
hell no I'm about to send your crackhead
ass to rehab so toldi started attacking
but it was file this [ __ ] done
unlock Ultra Instinct bro said bag your
[ __ ] this man told you D got blasted
and bro is floating what type of shrooms
is he on this is a level of high that is
just unexplainable but toldi was like I
have hell no I ain't about to lose no
pretty ass [ __ ] oh he started whipping
the chain but bro just look at this time
we like what are you supposed to do
about this how do you fight this I ain't
going to lie if I was told you I would
have just gave up cuz there is no point
of fighting this broken ass [ __ ] but it
sexy
finished and sadly this man toi got a
hole blown through him so then Gojo come
down and say any last words [ __ ] you you
pretty ass [ __ ] but also tell my
son to be a real [ __ ] like his
baby later Hyo man how's it going so uh
your dad wanted me to come and uh check
up on you man everything going good bro
dad wait a minute I have a dad is this
[ __ ] serious the sh
Tri exhibit a wrapup selling his son
dodging child support trespassing
scamming nigas attempted murder murder
attempted murder
trafficking exhibit
B all righty ladies and gentlemen it is
time for our grand finale Daddy's home
we now shift our Focus to 12 years later
on a gruesome Halloween night in the
shabuya district now as we can see all
hell is broke loose [ __ ] is getting
Stu but we shift our Focus over to this
old lady her grandson and Eno or what I
sorcerer so while Eno with her grandson
are throwing hands the old lady in the
back is doing some damn witchcraft she's
basically a necrom answer so she ends up
Reviving toi in her grandson's body so
he could use toi's body [ __ ] what the
[ __ ] you know what I ain't even going to
lie to y'all I do not know JJ K's power
system like that you what I can already
hear the jjk fans typing on they [ __ ]
keyboards like boo you [ __ ] yeah that's
right Boo me [ __ ] hey all I just know
is the old lady
with and the nigga's back but anyways
this man Eno tries to attack him but toi
takes his shyy punches him in the face
and grabs him by the collar and stars in
his soul like oh fake ass Gangsta
wearing this damn shyy shut your dumb
ass up and thre bro off of the
skyscraper my God look at itadori
looking at bro like oh broy you got your
ass beat and your shyy snatched who
could have done this but here is when
this gets absolutely insane so the old
lady like oh yes excellent work grandon
now go down there and kill all those
sorceress for granny but her grandson
start twitching and glitching and then
the unthinkable happened bro turns
around and says what did you say
[ __ ] but yeah uh this man told You's in
full control now bro's body is so damn
strong probably from the Heavenly
restriction he basically just little bro
the grandson's soul and snatched that
[ __ ] body then just look at this bro
hell no and just standing over her like
night night old [ __ ] oh Lord sweet Jes
a so after toi just murdered a senior
citizen later on nanami megumi Maki and
naito are trying to run away from Dagon
in his Bikini Bottom ass domain
expansion cuz they was getting they ass
beat but why they trying to get out a
whole opens and her father finally came
home to bring back that
milk so the first thing this man toi
does is grabs maki's weapon and starts
tugging that [ __ ] like give me that [ __ ]
and just yankes it away from her like
candy from a baby and while he's walking
towards Dagon now Ban's up realizing oh
oh sweet Jesus toy and this man was just
walking like a Terminator a literal
killing machine so Dagon old ugly ass
looking like Squidward in a m flare
fused started thinking he has no curs
energy this is barbecue chicken but my
man was about to get cooked and served
into a gourmet food at a seafood joint
though Dagon turns pregnant and shoots
out this fat ass eel but toi slaps it
and splits the sea like Moses and damn
pause he hit this man so hard he in
dented his face and lifted his ass T
toes off the ground so he sends him
flying and starts Hawking him down on
the water and beating his ass with these
numchucks he got this Buff Ass octopus
fighting for his life and then look at
this he ends up sending out these
piranhas and one lands on his face but
she bit that [ __ ] you know how raw you
got to be to bite a damn piranha oh no
so then he hits them in his pregnant
stomach again and he ends up trapping
them and sending them on the water and a
bunch of piranhas start nibbling on them
then this fat ass water bug comes from
the depths of the ocean and sends them
flying but toi chops up all the piranhas
and tells the water bug sit your ass
down and then this is where the fight
just got brutal now they're on Shore and
toi just starts walking the bro and just
starts beating the [ __ ] out of him just
hitting them over and over again he even
wrapped up on bro and drop kicked his
ass so then you started is sharpening
these damn numchucks ready to take the
life out of man's bro said anybody down
for some fried calamari so Dagon ends up
becoming [ __ ] and tries to dip so he
doesn't become Seafood but now beo stops
him and toi jumps up and stabs him in
the head and this is where toi's voice
role Red Lobster's new lobster and shrimp
shrimp
celebration and Now ladies and gentlemen
after this man toi turned Dagon into
fried calamari it was time for uh some
fatherson bonding so toi looks at Megami
and just throws him out the window and
poor Megam me because godamn it was time
for some tough love I was looking at him
like what's good little [ __ ] before I
died I hope to God you became a raw ass
[ __ ] so let's test your gangster young
blood and I know he ain't know this was
his son but God Dam and he was whooping
his ass look at him running at him bro
started blocking his attacks with one
hand and backhanded him head button him
and everything so then megum me summon
the Rayman Raving rabbits and then this
is where the animation was just cracked
out bro stepped on the ground got a
bunch of debris from the ground and
basically made them bullets and started
shooting all the rabbits out here
committing animal cruelty first the Octo
[ __ ] and now the ray men raving rabbits
I know the Peter hotline going crazy
right now then told you just continue to
beat the hell out of bro he basically
hit him with the oh I not tell you to
[ __ ] around like my Lord this giving
me some bad memories I remember I never
failed the test again after my Dad
pulled the belt on me in first grade
like look at him bro we even throwing a
truck [ __ ] at him so then toi ends up
stabbing him but then he bags off and
just starts looking at his little shaky
ass like oh no that's my boy so then he
started remembering how he sold him
thinking that it was the best form in
the dead mama in the background like
take care of me me h hone so then toi
says yeah [ __ ]
that huh I'm not paying that [ __ ]
[ __ ] damn bro would rather off himself
than pay that child
support and with that ladies and
gentlemen we have reached the end of our
first trial and with very valid
clear-cut evidence Mr fushiguro makes
this with EAS [Music]
[Music]
one trial down one to go when will it
drop I don't know bro is this [ __ ]
serious you know what [ __ ] it bro hey if
y'all like this video I'll drop this ho
sometime next week in the meantime go
sub to my group Channel with me and my
Bros Keys we do cool [ __ ] over there
trust me you'll love it and until we
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