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Every Manipulation Tactic Explained in 12 Minutes
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gaslighting gaslighting takes place when
someone seeks to make another person
doubt their own perception of reality
their own memory and their sanity the
term originates from a 1938 play called
Gaslight in which a husband manipulates
his wife into believing she is going
insane by dimming the gas lights in
their home and then denying that the
lights are flickering when she points it
out gaslighting undermines the victim's
confidence in their own judgment by
deploying confusing lies withholding
information and Shifting the blame onto
another person while at the same time
denying their side of the story and
claiming that what the other person is
saying is a lie guilt tripping guilt
tripping is when a manipulator makes a
victim feel bad about themselves their
actions or lack of action in a
particular situation for example if a
toxic and negative person isn't invited
to a friend's party and he finds out
about this he might say to the friend I
can't believe you didn't invite me to
your party I thought we were closer than
that to instill feelings of guilt and
ensure that he will be invited next time
isolation isolation is when a
manipulator cuts a victim off from their
friends or family making sure that no
support network exists to interfere with
the manipulator's plans a manipulator
does this by undermining the
relationship the victim has with their
loved ones and slowly turning them
against their friends and family by
convincing them that the people they
know aren't good for their well-being on
top of this a manipulator creates
dependency with their victim by making
them feel like they need their support
or approval instilling fear into the
victim so that they think they can't
survive without them this tactic is
often used by abusive Partners Cults and
online Predators love bombing love
bombing is a deceptive tactic where the
manipulator showers their victim with
affection attention and praise to make
them falsely believe that they are loved
using excessive compliments gifts and
frequent talks of extravagant future
plans together the manipulator expresses
intense emotions to make the victim feel
like they are the most important person
in their abuser's life when in reality
the only reason they are receiving such
false positivity is so that the abuser
can quickly gain as much power and
control as possible on top of this
people who love bomb to manipulate will
get the victim heavily attached to the
praise and then take it away at a
moment's notice to cause the victim to
Crave it and be more susceptible to the
abuser's requests historically speaking
it is said that Adolf Hitler used love
bombing techniques on his wife Eva Brun
to keep her close to him while he
pursued his destructive political
Ambitions playing the victim this is a
commonly used tactic that even
non-abusive or non-manipulative people
can ACC ly used to avoid taking
responsibility for something it is where
a manipulator acts like they are the
ones being wronged or hurt when in
reality they are the guilty ones by
blaming other people for their actions
and seeking sympathy through the
exaggeration of their problems all while
avoiding taking any responsibility and
admitting to their wrongdoing playing
the victim can be a very effective
strategy because it requires the other
person to attack the manipulator and
tell them that they are completely wrong
in order to attempt to regain control of
the narrative some something that most
people don't want to do threats or
coercion threats come in many different
forms firstly the obvious physical
threat of violence or damage to
someone's property if the victim doesn't
do exactly what the manipulator wants
then there's emotional threats such as
threatening to leave someone in a
relationship over a small or Petty Feud
or threatening to spread rumors about
someone that could damage their
reputation Financial threats are when
someone withholds financial support or
threatens their monetary stability which
hackers love to use against companies
when they successfully pull off a data
breach in fact this happened recently to
Colonial pipeline a major fuel pipeline
operator in the United States who was
targeted by a ransomware attack in which
hackers demanded a payment of $4.4
million in Bitcoin in exchange for the
decryption key financial threats can
also quickly turn into legal threats
with one party threatening to sue
another and finally there are social
threats in which a manipulator threatens
to damage the victim's reputation with
lies smear campaigns and slander which
we will talk about in more detail later
in this video Silent Treatment the
silent treatment is a form of
manipulation that typically takes place
in relationships but can also take place
in the workplace among friends and
online it's the practice of withholding
information or communication with an
individual as a form of punishment a
manipulator May withhold eye contact or
ignore their victim's presence and
existence entirely even when in the same
room as them as a controlling tactic it
is very similar to ghosting ghosting is
a very similar treatment into the silent
treatment as both tactics involve a lack
of communication between the manipulator
and the victim however the main
difference is that while the silent
treatment is used for punishment and
control ghosting is seen as a passive
and disrespectful way to end a
relationship or friendship permanently
while ghosting is not always used as an
intended form of manipulation it does
lead to a lack of closure causing the
victim to feel rejected abandoned and
Confused shaming shaming like threats
comes in many different forms firstly
there is public humiliation where a
manipulator makes negative comments
about a victim in front of other people
or online in order to embarrass them a
manipulator May compare the victim un
favorably to other people make them feel
inadequate and inferior blame them for
their own actions mock them to make them
feel foolish and ridiculous or openly
exclude them from social activities and
events triangulation this is a tactic in
which the manipulator brings in a third
party to create jealousy or competition
within the victim creating a feeling
that they need to compete for the
manipulator's attention the manipulator
may use the third party to make the
victim feel jealous by flirting with the
third party and spending more time with
them intentionally excluding the victim
from their activities the manipulator
feeds the idea of competition in the
victim's mind sometimes by even
spreading rumors about the victim to the
third party to turn them against each
other and create even more conflict all
of this puts the victim in a state of
mind where they are much easier to be
controlled by the manipulator or even by
the third party aggressive jokes jokes
can often hold much deeper meanings and
intentions being used to manipulate a
victim in several different ways writer
Shaha Arabi discusses this in their
article Thought Catalog writing that
quote covert narcissists enjoy making
malicious remarks at your expense these
are usually dressed up as just jokes so
that they can get away with saying
appalling things while still maintaining
an innocent cool demeanor yet anytime
you are outraged at an insensitive harsh
remark you are accused of having no
sense of humor these jokes go far past
the line taking insults sarcasm gas
slighting and exclusionary jokes to a
wildly different level then there are
jokes that take place at social events
that are designed to isolate the person
on the receiving end of them turning
them into the perceived fool and causing
everyone around them to become an
aggressor emotional blackmail emotional
blackmail is when the manipulator uses
threats guilt or other forms of
emotional manipulation to control and
manipulate the victim withholding
affection is a common tactic where the
manipulator seizes affection and support
to the victim until they comply with
their demands the manipulator may also
make make promises or commitments to the
victims only to break them later
projection projection is the act of
attributing your own thoughts and
feelings onto someone else making them
think they are guilty of what you feel
or have done this is also known as
victim blaming manipulators often blame
their victims for doing things they are
guilty of while at the same time failing
to realize the correlation between their
accusations against other people versus
their own actions deflection is another
tactic that manipulators use and it's
very similar to projection however
usually in deflection the manipulator is
fully aware of their own hypocrisy and
is deflecting it to someone else to
avoid facing responsibility whereas in
projection the manipulator lacks
self-awareness and is subconsciously
Shifting the blame smear campaigns the
awareness of smear campaigns has become
a heavily discussed Topic in recent
years unlike many of the other
manipulation tactics we've discussed in
this video so far smear campaigns aren't
usually deployed by One Singular person
against another instead politicians and
celebrities frequently accuse the media
and the general public of tarnishing
their name and image for money and
attention by participating in smear
campaigns against them smear campaigns
involve the use of spreading rumors and
gossip about the victim to make them
appear untrustworthy and unreliable
Often by intentionally misrepresenting
their words and twisting their intended
meanings to fit a specific agenda
character assassination is a big part of
a smear campaign because if the victim
seems immoral or unethical any attack
used against them can be easily
Justified Michael Jackson is one
celebrity who frequently called out the
media for making him a appear like a
pedophile causing many people to
brutally attack him in their minds he
was a pedophile so any tactic used
against him was fair and righteous
Donald Trump is another celebrity and
politician who spent his 2016 US
presidential campaign almost exclusively
calling out the media and their attacks
against them support for both of these
individuals remains heavily divided but
regardless of what you personally think
about either of them their Wars against
the Press are two alleged examples of
smear campaigns against one person
Shifting the goalposts Shifting the
goalposts is a common tactic used in
arguments where the manipulator changes
their criteria or standards for success
and achievement in order to avoid
admitting that they were wrong and
taking responsibility for something for
example let's say in a job a boss
promises their employee a raise if they
accomplish a specific task quickly but
then when that employee successfully
finishes that task on time the boss then
decides that they need to do three more
tasks to receive the previously promised
pay increase or let's say a parent
promises their child a reward if they
clean the house but then deny is giving
the reward because the kid didn't also
get high enough grades in class
something that wasn't previously
discussed changing the subject
manipulators love this quick tactic a
lot because the victim can very easily
fall for it unless they are quick enough
to call it out and keep the conversation
focused obviously there are varying
degrees of severity with this tactic as
well as a lot of the other tactics we've
discussed in this video however it's one
of many small tricks that if noticed can
lead to a victim questioning if there
are deeper levels of manipulation going
on at the same time playing on
insecurities manipulators love to
exploit their victim's fears and
anxieties by making them feel insecure
and uncertain about themselves as long
as their confidence is undermined they
will more than likely Fall prey to their
manipulator El Ron hubard the founder of
Scientology was a well-known historical
user of playing into people's
insecurities to get them to join his
cult he would Target people who were
lost and susceptible to his mental
paintings of personal transformation and
Enlightenment all while exploiting their
fears of the unknown world as well as
their fears of getting rejected by their
friends and family arguing that in
Scientology they would be accepted by
the world this made it very easy for him
to get tens of thousands of people to
submit to his teachings fake
moralization this tactic involves a
manipulator pretending to have high
moral standards and values in order to
gain power and control of others on
paper nobody likes an authoritative or
aggressive person leading them so of
course manipulators mask their true
intentions and behavior through various
methods such as through virtue signaling
by publicly supporting a cause or
charity in order order to gain Praise of
course manipulators that sit on the
moral High Ground engage in hypocritical
behavior all the time but unfortunately
it's up to the victim to pay attention
and call it out which is very difficult
to do in most situations making this not
an easy tactic to counter
infantilization whether it's through a
patronizing tone to make the victim feel
belittled and disrespected or intense
micromanagement of every aspect of their
victim's lives manipulators treating
their victims like children or infants
is done mainly for one reason power and
control being treated poorly by someone
else can cause a person to be incredibly
demoralized making it difficult for them
to muster The Willpower to stand up to
their abuser
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