0:01 hello there and welcome back to the
0:03 closet historian and back to
0:05 science hustle and again my casual
0:06 diary-ish series
0:08 again i'm just going to repeat this
0:09 every time in the beginning of these now
0:09 i guess
0:12 um where i just basically vlog about myself
0:13 myself
0:15 so you know in the grand tradition of
0:16 youtube will fold
0:19 you know and i have coffee so
0:21 that's good it's not even like you know
0:22 a fake there
0:24 can you see there there really is coffee
0:26 in there and um i take
0:28 my coffee with honey like a little
0:29 drizzle of honey
0:32 and soy milk vanilla creamer in case
0:33 anyone's ever wondering
0:34 i don't think that's very interesting but
0:36 but
0:39 oh well this year's goals video has a
0:40 lot more
0:43 you know context and uh i don't know like
0:43 like
0:46 macro level thinking as compared to
0:48 last year where of course when i was
0:49 making my goals for 2020 i had no idea
0:52 what 2020 was going to be like
0:54 and you know like i i guess ever making
0:57 goals is kind of an optimistic
0:59 and like nice hopeful thing to be doing
1:01 because it assumes that the year
1:04 won't have a global pandemic so
1:05 it's nice that we used to live in a
1:07 world where we weren't thinking that
1:09 that could happen at any time
1:11 almost in some ways you know but at the
1:12 same time it would have been good if
1:14 that world also had a plan in case it
1:16 did happen i guess
1:19 which seems all of us didn't really have
1:21 a plan
1:23 did we anyway i digress so of course
1:24 thinking about my goals for the next year
1:25 year
1:27 i'm imagining that the year is going to
1:28 be on like
1:31 or at least i'm going to be on lockdown
1:32 for the majority of the year
1:34 still at least i'm thinking my
1:35 birthday's in the middle of the year my
1:36 birthday's in july
1:41 i'll be turning 30 here in 2021
1:44 and i'm assuming i'll be in lockdown still
1:45 still
1:49 by that time like i doubt that
1:52 the majority of people around me and me included
1:52 included
1:54 will be vaccinated by july it just
1:56 doesn't seem that organized so far so i
1:57 highly doubt
1:59 that the world will be back to normal by
2:00 then normally i like to go thrifting for
2:02 my birthday which of course
2:04 i didn't get to do in 2020 either but
2:06 you know fair enough that's fine i don't mind
2:06 mind
2:08 luckily as an introvert it just isn't
2:10 that strange to spend my majority of time
2:10 time
2:13 uh inside in my office in my bedroom
2:16 with myself i keep myself entertained
2:18 pretty well like uh i don't really ever
2:20 get bored
2:21 but we'll talk about that a little later
2:23 perhaps once again i have my
2:25 notes here just so i can remember what
2:28 my own goals are to be fair this again
2:30 like most my side hustle and videos it's
2:32 just a way for me to
2:35 um say out loud what i'm already like have
2:36 have
2:38 going on and buzzing in my brain so this
2:39 is just like putting into paper putting into
2:40 into
2:42 video which is like my form of diary i
2:44 don't really keep a journal or a diary
2:44 or i don't
2:46 other than in video form so it's just
2:47 kind of my way of documenting where my
2:48 head is at
2:51 at any given time and so i don't like
2:52 keep my goals
2:54 anywhere throughout the year i don't
2:56 have a vision board or
2:59 goals list or calendar anything like
3:01 that around me at any time so
3:03 this is kind of the only way i put these
3:05 things into a physical almost form
3:08 even though it is i guess digital but my
3:11 first goal for 2021 is
3:14 to sew less this
3:16 shouldn't be that surprising last year i
3:18 made way too many things
3:20 uh both in the sense that it kept me
3:22 very busy which is why i was making very
3:22 many things
3:25 which meant i didn't get enough um or as
3:26 much as i wanted to
3:28 reading and writing done last year so
3:29 because i was sewing all the time
3:31 but also because like i don't need that
3:34 many clothes in fact i don't need
3:36 need any more clothes um but of course i
3:38 i want to make new things all the time because
3:39 because
3:40 i'm a fashion designer what do you want
3:42 from me and luckily because my job i do
3:43 get to make things for that so i still
3:45 will be making a few things of course in
3:47 2021 probably
3:49 i'm gonna set a goal for maybe like half
3:50 as many things max
3:51 that i made last year so last year i
3:53 ended up making 61 finished garments
3:57 in 2021 i would like to keep that number
3:59 under 30. we'll see we'll see how i do
4:00 but in relation to this
4:03 like so less things goal i also want to buy
4:03 buy
4:05 less fabric i really only want to buy
4:07 fabric for costuming projects next year
4:09 because i have plenty here in my stash
4:12 for normal sort of clothing sewing and
4:13 just like regular
4:15 demonstration projects i have tons of
4:16 fabric that has been in my stash for
4:17 years that i would like to go ahead and just
4:18 just
4:20 do some stash busting and bust through
4:21 the kind of stuff that i already
4:23 have of course i don't have a lot of you
4:25 know i don't know silk taffeta laying
4:26 around as we know
4:28 so when it comes to maybe making new
4:29 costume projects next year i will have
4:31 to invest in fabric for that but other
4:33 than that i'm going to try and do like a fabric
4:34 fabric
4:37 low buy for 2021. i'm hoping i have
4:39 placed my last mood order
4:41 until my birthday that's my goal is to
4:43 not place another mood order
4:45 until i allow myself one for my birthday
4:47 this is
4:49 currently my goal we will see keeping me
4:50 off of mood
4:51 i might have to set one of those like
4:54 child like parent locks for websites
4:57 where you can block certain websites and block
4:58 block
5:01 mood i'm not proud okay if i buy another
5:02 cotton sateen i'm gonna be really mad at
5:04 me you know
5:07 i gotta use what i have and related to my
5:08 my
5:10 sewing far too many things in general
5:11 not just last year but
5:14 for the last decade i have um on next on
5:15 my list here
5:19 have a big closet declutter creation so
5:20 that is something i will be sharing here
5:21 on the channel
5:23 i'm gonna go through my closet and try
5:24 and downsize a little bit
5:27 again as much as i love sewing and
5:30 fashion and clothes and accessories
5:31 and like styling and things like that i
5:33 just think my wardrobe
5:36 thanks to my feracious voracious
5:39 ferocious ferocious and voracious
5:42 i'll put the word i think i mean here uh
5:44 sewing habits i have a lot of
5:46 stuff and there's just no conceivable
5:47 wave that i'll ever especially in lockdown
5:48 lockdown
5:50 but even if the world were to open back
5:52 up no conceivable way i could wear
5:54 really all the things i have like in a
5:55 regular rotation
5:57 and therefore i just need to curate down
5:59 to what i love the very very most
6:02 and sell or donate some stuff
6:04 just because i feel like my wardrobe has
6:07 bloated to a size that i just am not
6:09 super comfortable with um i again live
6:10 at home
6:11 i don't have a ton of storage space i
6:13 don't have a separate bedroom set aside
6:14 all for my
6:16 clothing and accessories i'd love to
6:18 have like a closet room one day in life
6:19 but it seems
6:21 a very far away so i need to downsize a
6:22 little bit more just so that things
6:24 fit into my life a little bit better and
6:26 sort of fit my
6:28 lifestyle at least the lifestyle i wish
6:29 i was currently living
6:32 even right now i think i have more than
6:35 i would need to even if i were as social
6:36 and busy
6:38 as i don't know my imaginary version of
6:40 myself seems to be so i'll be having a
6:41 big declutter
6:42 you will be seeing the process of that
6:44 because everybody the internet loves
6:45 that kind of video
6:48 so we'll be con marrying or whatever
6:50 real soon here now next on my list and i
6:53 realize now after having mentioned it in
6:55 my last side hustle and video and
6:58 getting a little bit of feedback um that
7:00 is controversial which i don't think it
7:03 should be but is is to get vaccinated
7:04 i'm super hyped about it it's one of my
7:06 biggest goals for 2021
7:08 i cannot wait to get vaccinated now
7:10 something to know about me in general is
7:13 that i'm a big fan of uh science and
7:14 also like
7:16 medical science and uh like advancement
7:17 in general like for example
7:20 modern dentistry huge fan i'm so glad
7:21 that i haven't had to die
7:23 of like a toothache it's pretty great
7:25 you know um people always you know
7:26 it's a very common question especially
7:28 for vintage lovers to get is like which era
7:29 era
7:31 like oh you belong in another era or
7:33 like which time period would you like to
7:33 live in
7:37 and it's like as crappy as this one
7:38 occasionally is
7:41 um this one because again modern dentistry
7:42 dentistry
7:45 and like refrigeration and the internet
7:46 which is my favorite thing
7:49 of all things i love a lot of things but
7:50 the internet wins
7:52 but for those out there who find my
7:55 fervent desire to get vaccinated
7:56 strange or unnerving i will go ahead and
7:59 link to a recent video by sostine
8:01 who goes over you know all the
8:02 information about the vaccine i think in
8:03 quite detail
8:05 because she happens to be a medical
8:07 doctor so if you don't listen to me
8:08 some random girl who does some sewing
8:10 sometimes fair go listen to someone who does
8:11 does
8:13 really good sewing and also happens to
8:14 be a medical doctor as well so
8:16 check that out the link will be below
8:18 and now next i'm on day two of
8:21 and it's already interesting
8:22 and that is to develop a better
8:25 relationship with instagram
8:29 um it's you know i don't have like a
8:30 problem with instagram i mean there's
8:32 some there's so many different problems
8:33 you can have with social media you know
8:36 um my issue with instagram my chief
8:37 issue i think is that
8:40 it's just distraction available 24 7 at
8:42 any time on my phone
8:43 so if i'm waiting for something to
8:45 download like waiting for footage to
8:47 transfer over i can look at instagram
8:48 if i'm having lunch i can look at
8:50 instagram when i wake up i
8:51 look at instagram for like a half hour
8:53 like on average every day i don't
8:54 actually i didn't have screen time
8:55 turned on so i couldn't see how much
8:56 time i was spending each day on instagram
8:58 instagram
9:00 but i'm sure it was like a couple of
9:01 hours not like
9:02 crazy numbers i don't think it was like
9:04 six hours or anything like anything like that
9:04 that
9:07 but of course i will never now know um
9:09 but i know i was spending at least like
9:10 a half hour in the mornings it was the
9:11 first thing i looked at when i woke up
9:13 and then usually was the last thing i
9:14 was doing was browsing instagram before bed
9:15 bed
9:17 for like another half hour probably at
9:18 least so
9:20 that's an hour of time i could be using
9:22 to do something else
9:24 during my day an hour plus of each day
9:25 that i could have back
9:28 if i weren't distracted popping on and
9:30 off to instagram all day
9:32 and of course instagram is designed to
9:33 make you want to
9:35 open it up all the time because that's
9:36 why it doesn't give you a chronological feed
9:37 feed
9:39 i'm assuming that's why they choose to
9:40 show you something new every time you
9:41 open the app like if you open it
9:43 close it and go back in a minute later
9:44 it'll show you something new so that you
9:46 stay on the app longer so you go back on
9:48 the app it's like designed
9:50 for that purpose so i try not to feel
9:51 like it's me
9:54 it's definitely the app is designed and
9:55 they like do
9:57 studies on like how to psychologically
9:58 get you you know
10:01 so i don't know between that and like a
10:02 lot of the new updates over there where
10:03 it's like
10:06 shopping first art last i'm you know
10:08 they're owned by facebook which isn't my
10:10 favorite company either so i'm trying to
10:11 wean myself off of instagram a little
10:12 bit and
10:14 for in order to do that i'm starting out
10:16 by this month
10:18 not going on instagram on my phone i'm
10:20 allowed to check it on the computer like
10:21 once a day just to make sure i'm not
10:22 missing any like
10:24 i don't know actually cool brand
10:25 opportunities or something but
10:28 or like my out of um i have a couple of
10:29 friends who live out of the country and
10:30 so if they're messaging me on instagram
10:31 i want to know
10:33 so i can reply to them but i'm not
10:34 checking it on my phone i've hidden the app
10:35 app
10:37 in several folders so i can't get to it
10:39 easily but i definitely have picked up
10:40 my phone several times already in the
10:41 last couple of
10:43 two days that i haven't had instagram or
10:44 haven't had access to it
10:47 and tried to open and realized it's not
10:49 there and i'm like oh yeah that's right
10:50 i just have to like sit with my thoughts
10:52 or something
10:54 but yeah i know this isn't very like
10:56 interesting anymore like doing a social
10:58 media detox of any kind because
11:00 yeah everyone everyone knows that social
11:02 media isn't 100
11:04 uh isn't a source of 100 good in the
11:05 world i think
11:08 um and even for me like i think my
11:09 biggest problem with it is distraction
11:12 as opposed to like um fomo things like
11:14 that i don't really get fomo looking at
11:16 instagram or i'm not really like jealous
11:18 of anyone else's like polished life or
11:19 anything like that
11:21 um especially because no one's like out
11:23 traveling and that's what i would be
11:23 jealous about
11:26 because i wish i was traveling but uh
11:27 really it's more just like i need my
11:28 time back
11:30 and there's one way i can like the only
11:32 way i can get more time in a day
11:34 is to find where i'm wasting it and
11:36 instagram might be one of those
11:37 one of those places where i might be
11:39 wasting a little bit too much time and
11:41 in relation to trying to reclaim
11:44 an hour plus of each day of mine next
11:45 year i want to read at least
11:48 25 books i've been doing so poorly on my
11:49 to be read pile
11:53 for the last while
11:54 and i would just really like to do
11:56 better at this so i'm setting myself an
11:57 actual numerical goal this time i want
11:59 to read 25 books
12:00 i want to read more than that but i'm
12:02 setting myself like a low numerical goal
12:04 hoping that i can hit that
12:05 you know sooner rather than later so
12:08 really i want to do 25 plus
12:10 books um it doesn't have to be fiction
12:11 or non-fiction or anything like i just
12:13 any kind of book
12:14 i think people like to do this vague
12:16 category um of how many books read to as
12:17 opposed to like pages read
12:19 because then you can read really short
12:20 books and still meet your goal and i'm
12:21 here for that but i just feel like any
12:22 time i
12:25 save from not spending on my phone i
12:26 would like to transform that into time i spend
12:27 spend
12:29 reading so that is one of my major goals
12:30 for this next year then one of my
12:31 biggest goals
12:33 for next year actually is a financial
12:35 goal another number based goal in some ways
12:36 ways
12:38 i would like to save a certain amount of
12:40 money each month and set it aside
12:42 and i'm going to try and pay off one of
12:43 my student loans next year
12:46 now like i assume many people i have
12:47 several different loans that make up
12:50 my student loan jet debt in general so
12:51 again i have like um
12:54 government like based loans that the
12:55 government will give you to help you
12:57 get you get your studies here in the us
12:59 um so i have government loans which
13:01 are one thing and then i have private
13:03 loans i only have one
13:05 actually private loan that's in my name
13:06 and my government loans are actually
13:08 still the majority of my student loan debt
13:08 debt
13:11 but i would like to try and pay off my
13:12 private loan
13:14 this next year i'm not going anywhere
13:16 i'm not supposed to be buying fabric
13:17 i need to be on like a low buy in
13:19 general i'm not spending money on travel
13:21 i'm not spending money on going out to dinner
13:22 dinner
13:24 things like that so i really want to try
13:26 and set aside a certain amount each
13:27 month and try
13:29 and like i've been paying this loan for
13:30 since i graduated university so for
13:32 several years now
13:36 so it's um about i would say it's still
13:38 over like half the principle is left i
13:40 think uh total
13:42 but i want to just pay off the whole
13:44 thing which is like several thousand dollars
13:45 dollars
13:48 um which is a big goal for me to have
13:50 i'm not i've never i've actually spoken
13:51 about this a little bit here on citizen
13:52 4 but i'm like
13:55 i'm not the best at finances i didn't uh
13:57 you know it's not something i learned
14:00 or necessarily always had modeled for me um
14:00 um
14:03 saving is not something i really like
14:04 grew up
14:06 knowing about um so it's definitely like
14:08 a newer concept to me
14:10 of like financial literacy is not
14:11 something i necessarily have i guess is
14:13 what i'm trying to say
14:16 but i i've spoken about this definitely
14:17 a lot here on saturday and it's like i
14:20 feel a lot of
14:23 guilt and like uh burden about my
14:24 student loans
14:26 uh i find them rather anxiety inducing
14:27 just knowing
14:29 that you know ever since i've started
14:30 trying to be an adult
14:32 on my own after university really i'm
14:34 not that i wasn't making attempts at
14:35 adulting during university
14:37 where i finally didn't live here for a
14:38 little while it did happen for a brief moment
14:39 moment
14:41 and the biggest plus of living at home
14:42 and not having a huge
14:44 burden like rent to pay each month means
14:46 that i should be able to
14:48 be paying down my loans but i just
14:50 haven't had a stable enough
14:52 stable enough job and income until now
14:53 and funny enough
14:55 the internet and youtube is a more
14:57 stable job than any i've been able to
14:59 get out there in the real world
15:01 since graduating college so now that i
15:03 finally have a somewhat
15:05 stable situation and a job i'm really
15:07 happy in and it's not like
15:08 you know i've had jobs before where i'm
15:11 like okay the pay is okay but i clearly
15:12 don't want to stay here which is
15:14 not how i feel about youtube i would
15:15 love to stay here i would love to grow and
15:15 and
15:18 hopefully thrive here online so
15:20 i'm feeling a little bit more stability
15:22 in that if i can just keep up
15:25 what i have now um then hopefully i will
15:27 be able to
15:29 get rid of this one boulder i feel like
15:30 i'm carrying
15:34 um i just feel and i i feel like this
15:35 for myself and also for other people
15:37 that like
15:41 it's hard to feel
15:44 hope it's hard to be super excited about
15:45 your future when you already feel like
15:47 you have
15:49 this huge like thing hanging over you
15:50 and so
15:54 sorry mascara um to not
15:56 have that debt i don't know what it's
15:58 like to be an adult who doesn't
15:59 who's not already in debt like i just
16:01 don't even know ever since i was a kid
16:02 ever since i was 18 and took out my
16:03 first student loans
16:05 because that's what everybody did i've
16:07 had debt
16:09 hanging over me and i just would love to
16:12 know what it was like to have
16:14 less of that so my goal for this next
16:16 year my biggest goal probably of the
16:18 year honestly is
16:21 to pay off one of my loans so i'm really hoping
16:22 hoping
16:24 that i can do that of course only you
16:25 watching these videos
16:27 and my patrons supporting me can make
16:29 that possible and me holding up my end
16:30 of the deal and making
16:32 great content for you all um is going to
16:33 make that possible
16:35 it just also would open up more
16:37 opportunities for me because i always feel
16:38 feel
16:40 like almost bad about spending money on anything
16:41 anything
16:44 other than my debt in some ways so like
16:46 as far as like starting new
16:49 business ventures like investing and
16:50 having my patterns graded or in starting
16:51 an actual like
16:53 pattern company and things like that or
16:55 starting any sort of like
16:58 physical side to the closet historian i
16:58 always feel like
17:00 i should be spending that money to
17:01 paying off my debt as opposed to
17:02 starting new ventures
17:04 but if i didn't if i didn't have as much
17:07 debt i wouldn't feel as bad
17:09 spending money on like new things
17:11 hopefully that makes some sense i just
17:12 feel like
17:15 um it might be like it would be nice to
17:16 not feel
17:18 burdened by it all the time anymore so
17:19 i'm gonna try and eliminate
17:22 one loan this year is the battery dying already
17:23 already
17:26 yes am i gonna push on yes
17:28 is that wise we'll find out but in
17:29 relation to spending some money i also
17:31 do want to make another big costume next year
17:32 year
17:34 of course the cicada gown isn't even
17:35 technically over yet
17:38 but that the materials for that gown
17:38 were a big inve
17:40 was my biggest investment probably of 2020
17:42 2020
17:43 it's hard to say whether the cicada
17:45 project or my new laptop were more expensive
17:46 expensive
17:48 i did buy a new laptop last year i won't
17:49 tell you what kind or
17:51 it's like some sort of dell but i'm not
17:53 super happy with it anyway but it was
17:54 what the best i could do it was like just
17:55 just
17:57 when lockdown was like becoming a major
17:58 thing and i was like well i can't do
17:59 this without a computer so i went and
18:00 got a laptop
18:02 but um that was a big investment but
18:03 then also this kid again they might be
18:04 about equal honestly
18:07 and i've you know spent even more time
18:08 with the laptop so
18:09 very essential upgrade there but i do
18:11 want to make another big costume next year
18:12 year
18:14 i'm not going to give you any hints um
18:15 other than to say that i think we're
18:17 gonna be sticking with green so if you
18:18 don't like the color green as much as i
18:20 do i'm sorry
18:21 but as i've spoken about a little bit
18:23 here on the channel costuming um
18:25 is both something that i used to be very
18:27 into and i've never lost
18:29 really the passion for i just lost the
18:31 kind of motivation for a little while
18:31 and the
18:33 funding to be able to do it but now that
18:35 i have the funding thanks to patreon
18:36 i do want to get back into costuming
18:37 especially because it seems to be
18:38 something that
18:40 all of you enjoy watching as well um i
18:43 enjoy making them and especially i'll
18:44 enjoy it now that i'm not going to ever
18:46 set myself that harsh of a deadline again
18:46 again
18:47 because when i tried to do everything
18:48 before halloween that was kind of a
18:50 mistake so i won't be making that
18:50 mistake again
18:52 lesson learned but i think it's both a
18:54 very fun and like
18:55 interesting challenge for me to dive
18:57 into doing costuming and it does very
18:59 well here on youtube it definitely helped
18:59 helped
19:02 grow the channel last year um october
19:04 was my best month in 2020 and that was
19:05 the month i was doing the costuming
19:06 project so
19:09 it is something that is like almost a
19:10 marketing expense for me
19:13 i'm doing costuming videos is like
19:14 better than putting out ads in some ways
19:15 like it
19:17 draws people to the channel and so they
19:18 discover me um it's good for my
19:20 discoverability i suppose and also
19:22 i have a fun time doing it so it's a
19:24 win-win really there so i'm going to go
19:25 ahead and make another big costume next
19:27 year as well and then we come to what
19:28 i'm going to be calling the
19:30 the post-pandemic goals which is to say
19:33 if at any time in 2021
19:36 lockdown ends and it's safe to actually
19:37 go out
19:38 into the world a little bit more these
19:40 are some goals i have for
19:42 for them and the first one of those is
19:43 to actually start taking language
19:45 classes i know this is something i could do
19:46 do
19:48 even locked down but i think it would be
19:50 nice to be able to get me out of the
19:51 house like once or twice a week as well um
19:52 um
19:55 and so it's much more of like a
19:57 socializing and like getting out of the
19:58 house kind of goal as much as it is like
20:00 me wanting to learn a language
20:02 i would really like to learn french
20:03 because i do have a little bit of
20:05 french already i took french in high
20:07 school but i would just like to actually
20:08 learn to properly
20:10 read and speak french or at least one
20:11 other language
20:12 and then just obviously i've already had
20:14 a head start with that one so we'll jump
20:14 in there
20:17 my second post-pandemic goal would be to
20:18 go on a road trip because i wanted to go
20:19 on one
20:22 this year but i did not get to obviously
20:23 or this past year i mean to say
20:25 but i did not get to of course because
20:26 it was not safe to do so although
20:29 traveling in your own car is about as
20:30 safe as we could get in 2020 but of
20:32 course nothing was open
20:33 and one couldn't leave the car much and
20:35 that's less fun so i would like to go
20:37 on a road trip once it's safe to do so
20:39 uh really i'm waiting to do this
20:42 until it's safe to go thrifting along
20:42 the way
20:44 i'd like to like take a road trip and
20:45 then stop at all the little thrift
20:47 stores and antique stores i might hit
20:48 along the way
20:50 i've never been to the grand canyon and
20:51 i've lived kind of in the western
20:52 half of the united states my whole life
20:54 and i've just never been so i'd like to
20:55 go ahead and
20:57 drive there now that i have a car that's
20:58 kind of safe enough to do so i didn't
21:00 always have a car that
21:03 everyone around me felt was capable of
21:04 making it that far and back but now
21:07 that i do and of course my car is when
21:08 you lease a car you're only allowed to
21:10 have a certain number of miles right
21:13 but in 2020 i didn't put very many miles
21:14 on my car
21:15 you know so i think i'm safe to go ahead
21:17 and take a road trip in that car when it is
21:18 is
21:19 safe to do so and then i would like to
21:21 go for a ridiculously
21:23 fancy dinner and i don't mean
21:25 necessarily that the dinner itself
21:27 needs to be fancy only that i wish to
21:29 dress incredibly fancy to go to it
21:30 because as we know
21:31 i've been making some evening gowns and
21:33 i have a lot of fancy evening stuff i
21:35 never get to wear so when
21:38 it's safe to do so i would like to go and
21:38 and
21:40 convince a friend to get really dressed
21:42 up with me and just go out for really fancy
21:43 fancy
21:44 dinner and drinks somewhere and buy
21:46 fancy again i don't mean like a gourmet meal
21:47 meal
21:49 i don't want veal or flan or anything i
21:51 just want to get really dressed up and
21:53 then lastly for post-pandemic goals
21:54 again it's going to be my 30th birthday
21:56 next year and i would kind of like to get
21:57 get
21:59 a new tattoo uh as kind of like a
22:01 birthday present to myself
22:02 but i don't know if that'll be able to
22:04 be something i can do in 2021
22:06 i don't really have an artist picked out
22:08 even or anything like that um
22:09 there are different things i know i
22:11 would like to have and i know some
22:12 people don't like tattoos on vintage
22:13 girls but like
22:15 my life you know too bad but i would
22:16 like to get
22:18 another tattoo if it is safe and
22:19 possible to do so next year
22:23 and then my last goal for 2021
22:25 i'm going to call it a soft goal because
22:27 if i don't hit this
22:29 fine i mean especially looking over in
22:31 my last side hustling video
22:33 what was holding me back from being able
22:35 to do this kind of thing last year
22:36 may still be a problem this year and
22:38 that is that i would like to write
22:41 another book um i kind of always would
22:42 like to write another book
22:44 it's kind of my constant state but i
22:46 would like to both prioritize and balance
22:47 balance
22:50 my work life situation to in a way that
22:52 makes it possible for me to spend enough time
22:52 time
22:55 writing to write another book and also
22:56 just to
22:59 i don't know give myself that time again
23:00 i've said i have a responsibility to
23:03 myself to allow myself to write
23:06 so that i can be my happiest best self
23:09 the best me the happiest me is the one
23:10 who has been writing so
23:14 i need to give myself permission to
23:15 indulge in it
23:18 because again life is only so long and i
23:19 might as well
23:22 spend as many hours and days of it
23:25 happy and feeling joy as i can and for me
23:25 me
23:29 i feel the most alive
23:32 and joyous and happy and like
23:36 hi almost when i have been writing and
23:37 so i just need to
23:40 go ahead and let that become more of a
23:41 priority in this next year
23:44 and it's my goal to finish the third book
23:45 book
23:47 or two i've i've started it in the sense
23:48 that i have the first chapter
23:50 and i have the last chapter and have a
23:52 pages of notes
23:54 but i would like to do some research
23:56 that i need to do in order to
23:59 feel like i'm ready to write that story
24:00 um and then also
24:02 go ahead and like kind of complete that
24:04 work and like tie
24:06 a bow on it for now so that i can work
24:07 on other things i was thinking about
24:09 this a little bit last time but
24:12 i would like to finish that story finish
24:15 my time with those characters for now i
24:16 might you know dip back in especially
24:17 because i have like
24:19 most of a prequel written for those guys
24:20 so i may jump into their
24:23 their past in my future sometime but i
24:24 would like to write the third book in
24:26 that series
24:27 i don't even think i'll have to finish
24:29 it in the sense of like having edited it
24:30 several times i don't really consider a
24:32 book done until i've edited it
24:34 all the way through a lot but if i could
24:36 just have the first draft
24:38 of the third book done i would feel
24:39 better about then going on
24:41 and working on new ideas as well and i
24:42 do have some new ideas that i would
24:43 really like
24:46 to start working on next year as well um
24:47 it can take me as little
24:49 time as like eight or ten weeks to write
24:50 a book
24:53 um so it's it just depends on things
24:54 falling into place
24:56 um but i would like to start working on
24:58 other ideas even as well next year so
25:00 that's kind of a big goal to say i would
25:01 like to finish a book and then be able
25:03 to start other ones but
25:06 that's my like soft hope and goal for
25:08 next year is to be able to
25:11 have that much time writing
25:14 and i've had people say on my lookbook
25:15 sometimes because i
25:18 obviously i like make small narratives
25:20 in some ways to go into my lookbooks and
25:21 i've had people say i would like read this
25:22 this
25:25 story i want to see the full movie um and
25:25 and
25:27 weirdly enough i didn't spend to be honest
25:28 honest
25:31 i didn't spend a ton of time working on
25:32 this story
25:34 that is in part part of the noir
25:35 lookbook just because i
25:37 didn't give myself enough time to do the
25:38 noir lookbook really so i wrote the
25:40 story kind of quickly
25:43 but i actually really want to expand on
25:44 that one
25:46 um and i think i could have a really
25:47 good time
25:50 writing that as a book so that's the
25:52 kind of other idea
25:55 that i'm hoping to get to next year if i finish
25:56 finish
25:58 the third book of my other series so if
26:00 i can finish that up
26:02 and kind of tie that up for myself and
26:04 then start working on possibly the
26:06 millionaire millionaire
26:09 the millionaire milliner which we can
26:10 already see
26:12 would be a terrible title for this book
26:13 because it's hard to say
26:16 oh well but yeah i kind of want to write
26:17 the millionaire milliner
26:20 so we'll see how that goes if i
26:24 get time to do that i really
26:28 i hope i and can stick to it i can can
26:31 be strict with myself and give myself
26:33 writing time this next year
26:35 that should be my biggest goal honestly
26:37 um it's that
26:39 and paying off that loan both would
26:40 alleviate a lot of anxiety for me
26:42 honestly because writing makes me happy
26:45 and being in debt makes me unhappy
26:48 but those are my goals for 2021
26:51 again it feels optimistic to making any goals
26:52 goals
26:55 and there's still very real chance that like
26:56 like
26:59 i could get sick or um anything could
27:00 happen but that's always true every
27:01 single year
27:05 um so i i feel like i have to keep living
27:06 living
27:09 especially not knowing how long any of
27:11 us gets the chance to do so so
27:13 for as long as i have the opportunity to keep
27:14 keep
27:17 doing my creative work uh making things
27:18 sewing things
27:22 designing making videos and writing
27:23 as long as i have the opportunity to do
27:25 so i feel like i should
27:27 again i feel like i owe it to myself in
27:29 some ways um
27:31 i don't feel like i'm owed that
27:33 opportunity like i don't feel entitled
27:34 to it
27:36 but because i have it i feel like i better
27:38 better
27:40 like take advantage of that and like use it
27:42 it
27:44 um i'm lucky to have the opportunities i
27:46 do the time i have
27:49 um and i feel like
27:51 i would like to put it to good use so
27:52 these are my goals
27:54 for how to do that for the next year and
27:56 again i've managed to go off on another
27:57 tangent before ending the video
27:59 thank you for listening and i'll see you
28:02 again here in 2021 bye
28:05 again another huge shout out thanks to
28:07 my conservator patrons
28:10 che karina ellen carol
28:13 lynn margaret maria nancy
28:16 rebecca rhonda singularity and tracy
28:18 thank you all so so much for your
28:20 support and thank you to all of my
28:21 patrons and to all of you who watch
28:22 these videos
28:24 especially these side hustle and diary
28:25 ones because goodness
28:27 and here i would like to reward you with
28:28 a small moment
28:32 of me with my cat in a sink um
28:34 i have a jack and jill bathroom so
28:35 therefore two sinks
28:38 um and one of them is just for her to
28:39 sit in honestly
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