0:01 once we reach our late 40s or 50s or 60s
0:05 the quality of her life in many respect
0:08 revolves around the quality of the types
0:11 of friends that we're surrounding
0:13 ourselves by so in today's video I want
0:15 to share with you five signs that maybe
0:19 your friend that you think likes you
0:21 really doesn't like and maybe they
0:24 dislike I think it's important that we
0:26 know the difference and as a financial
0:29 advisor for over 20 years I've met many
0:32 many different people and part of my job
0:34 was to get to know people to have a feel
0:37 of what's motivating them and I want to
0:40 share with you some of the top tips that
0:42 I found and the hopes that you don't
0:44 waste your time you surround yourself
0:47 with true friends so let's jump in and
0:50 one of the first signs is not only is it
0:53 hard to get on their schedule you know
0:56 to say hey let's do something together
0:59 but
1:00 they're also likely to to cancel at the
1:04 last minute or or cancel what after
1:07 they've already committed to doing
1:09 something and you know what life is just
1:11 too short for that so if somebody does
1:13 that two or three times for you you know
1:16 it's not a good sign another one and
1:20 this one I want to be cautious on
1:21 because you know here I am I'm in Costa
1:23 Rica as I record this this is definitely
1:26 an American cultural thing but the
1:29 reality is we live in America so they
1:32 you know these things matter and that is
1:35 if somebody's always late to getting
1:38 together with you it may not be that
1:41 they dislike you it just might be that
1:44 they're not showing respect you know in
1:46 the United States we're raised you know
1:49 five minutes is kind of the margin of
1:51 error for being late and if you're going
1:53 to be more than three four five minutes
1:56 late you need to send a text to your
1:58 friend and and and let them know you're
2:01 going to be late so if somebody is
2:02 showing up late and they act like it's
2:04 no big deal in the US culture that's a
2:08 warning sight in the Latin American
2:10 culture it's it's definitely not a
2:12 warning sight you know getting together
2:14 for lunch at 12:00 noon really means you
2:18 know
2:19 sometime actually lunch it would be
2:21 closer to 2 o'clock here but it would
2:23 not be unusual for somebody to be 15
2:26 minutes late that would be considered
2:27 being pumpable here okay so that's
2:30 that's the second one the the third one
2:34 is if it seems like they don't show the
2:38 same level of
2:41 enthusiasm when when you're getting
2:44 together with them that maybe you notice
2:46 that that they show for other people and
2:49 you know we all have bad days so just
2:52 because somebody's not very outgo uh
2:55 when we get together with them or you
2:57 know we go to a football game with them
2:58 or whatever and maybe they're having a
3:00 bad day and so they're kind of quiet you
3:02 know that's fine but if you're at a
3:05 social event and and they're acting one
3:07 way towards you and but maybe they're
3:09 acting a different way towards other
3:11 people more energy more excitement you
3:15 know uh giving somebody a hug when they
3:17 see them as opposed to a handshake or a
3:20 kiss on the cheek uh as opposed to a
3:23 handshake or a hey how you doing type
3:26 thing um that can be a warning sign and
3:28 again all of these things I think are
3:32 important because we want to surround
3:34 ourselves with people that are going to
3:37 give us energy that are going to make
3:40 the quality of our life better which
3:43 which brings me to the to the third
3:45 point which is do they give you
3:49 energy when when you are visiting with
3:53 them afterwards you think you know I'm
3:57 really glad I spent time wake them and
3:59 it seemed like they were energized by
4:02 spending time with you and they they
4:04 were excited to have seen you and
4:06 they're they're asking hey when are we
4:08 going to get together next you know we
4:10 should do this more often those are the
4:13 kinds of things that we want I think a
4:15 friends almost like a Garder my
4:18 grandfather was a
4:19 farmer and uh he passed away before I
4:23 was born but my mother and her sisters
4:27 have shared with me how much work it was
4:29 being a farmer and you know my
4:32 grandfather would have to cultivate the
4:36 main crop that you was growing so he
4:39 would spend time effort water nutrients
4:43 and are your friends putting that into
4:45 the relationship with you and if they're
4:49 not you know maybe that's okay we have
4:51 different levels of friends and it's
4:53 definitely uh healthy to to have
4:56 different levels of friends right not
4:58 everybody's going to be your best friend
5:00 but if your friend's not returning the
5:03 amount of effort and um nurturing a
5:07 relationship like you are and if they're
5:10 sucking energy out of your relationship
5:14 maybe it's time to think about you know
5:16 one of the things a farmer has to do is
5:18 he's got to weave the Fe the the field
5:21 and he's got to make sure that um the
5:24 cop is is is healthy and maybe you need
5:27 to do that as well okay the the fifth
5:31 one and stick around to em because I'm
5:34 gonna I'm gonna share how we put this
5:36 all together and how it can really lead
5:39 to enrich your life but the the fifth
5:42 one is if the person you're spending
5:46 time with is putting down other people
5:49 in front of you you know then the
5:52 question become what does they say about
5:54 you in front of other people right I
5:57 mean there are kind people do crazy C
5:59 things I'm sure my friends has said you
6:02 know hey like my started a YouTube
6:04 channel can you believe us school
6:06 started in YouTube show that seems
6:08 strange to them and I'm sure there were
6:10 conversations that were taking place uh
6:14 amongst them that I didn't know about
6:16 and that's that's okay you know I'm the
6:17 only one of my friends that have a
6:19 YouTube channel so that was that was
6:21 kind of strange and and then it kind of
6:23 took off sub there was a conversation on
6:26 on that as well but you know if it goes
6:29 beyond that if it goes towards you know
6:32 somebody saying something negative about
6:34 you or if you find out from your friends
6:37 that somebody is is saying one thing to
6:39 your face and then another thing behind
6:42 your face now I don't have a problem
6:44 when somebody's like hey you know what
6:46 ass did this and it hurt my feelings and
6:49 I wish he hadn't done that and
6:51 unfortunately i' had accidentally done
6:53 that I try to be a really good friend uh
6:56 to my friends uh but you know what
6:58 sometimes I step on people's toes which
7:01 which brings me to the next one is we're
7:04 not always going to be perfect friends
7:07 for the people that we hang around with
7:10 and when we do make a mistake being
7:13 willing to
7:15 forgive being willing to let all it the
7:18 sign of a good friend is your willing to
7:20 do that when when you do that to them
7:23 and Bas versal when you do that to
7:25 others because we all know it becomes a
7:27 trap when we hold on to a grudge The
7:31 Grudge hurts us more than the person
7:34 that we're saying hey I wish this person
7:37 had not done that so friends are the
7:41 Spice of light in retirement friends are
7:44 the spice of life when we're working
7:46 French are the spice of life we have all
7:48 the responsibilities of raising our kids
7:52 I just want to make sure that that spice
7:54 Al like is in Asing your meal not
7:57 destroying your meal right a little bit
7:59 of garlic goes a long way a little bit
8:01 of Al banero sauce goes goes a long way
8:04 as well and I want your friends to to be
8:08 helping you put together the perfect
8:10 melody of a
8:11 meal that allows you and your friends to
8:14 enjoy their like to the Fuller which is
8:17 one of the reasons I made this video up
8:19 there which talks about the eight things
8:21 to stop doing as you get ready for
8:24 retirement so you can enjoy the journey
8:27 until you're retired thanks for watching
8:29 in this video I'll see you in the next
8:31 byebye
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