YouTube Transcript:
“I Was a Militant Atheist” - The One Terrifying Moment That Forced Dave Smith To Reject Atheism

Do you find in your life, this is a quiz
I give a lot of people, more people you
know personally talking about God than
you did say 10 years ago? Yes. Um and I
am that person. I mean I was an atheist
10 years ago. I had my daughter. Yeah.
Um that's you know is I found God the
day my wife delivered our first uh child
and um which is a fairly common
experience. Uh I know other people who
have had the same thing were atheists
until that moment. And um what what can
what changed in you? So all right so it
was uh basically so I met my so you know
it's a fairly normal story but I I met
my wife and we got engaged and then um
we got married. Um so my wife's like the
most amazing check. She's just great.
And I know this is it's always a thing
to say it's like my wife's better than
your wife type thing but everybody who
knows my wife and I don't mean you I've
never met your wife but but she is
better. And I'm just kidding. Uh, I
don't I don't hear people compliment
their spouses enough actually. I don't
think everyone always says that. I wish
people that more often. Well, I do, you
know, it's not me. She's really just the
best. Everyone who knows her would
agree. I mean, like, it's just like
she's like the most amazing woman. She's
just gorgeous and she's really super
smart and she's really sweet and kind.
Um, and she's just like she she puts
everyone above herself. She's like I I
really hit the lottery with her. And I
was never, you know, I was like
habitually single. I was never a
relationship guy and I never really
wanted to get married. I kind of always
had this view of like, you know, women
are trying to change you or trying to
control you. Every girl that I ever
dated always wanted a relationship and
then they always wanted me to not do
this or not do that. And my wife was
just she just had my back. She just
always like wanted to make my life
better and she did. And I just I fell in
love with her and I I was like I'm going
to spend the rest of my life with this
woman. And so then we uh when she got
pregnant, I just I was just very
excited. It was like, you know, we just
got married. I got a a baby on the way.
Um I was just like, "This is going to be
this is the best. Like I'm really
excited to to do this." And um and I was
right. It was the best thing I've ever
done. And so the uh the day that uh was
um well, she was over her due date. So
then they they scheduled to come in to
induce pregnancy cuz they don't let you
go too long these days. Um which I guess
is maybe they're right about that. I
don't know. But anyway, so we go to the
hospital. They get the ptocin out. Yes,
that's right. So, we're at uh Lennox
Hill Hospital in the Upper East Side of
Manhattan. And
um by the way, I should I should add
just leading into the story over the I
had been like a militant atheist when I
was younger. I had started to open up my
mind a little bit to being like I I was
seeing some of the holes in the atheist
arguments, but I still was not like a
believer in God. And so, we were at
Lennux Lennox Hill Hospital and this is
how this was the first one. This is how
it started was um the uh the
anesthesiologist came in to give my wife
an epidural and at Lennox Hill or at
least this guy they asked me to leave
the room. Um they said they ask the
fathers to leave the room when they do
it, you know, cuz they're they're
putting a spinal thing in and they have
to be very very precise. Yeah. Right. So
like and and they don't want I guess
they don't want you there to react cuz
then she might react and so they don't
want to so I go at she can't see what's
happening. Right. she can't see, but she
could see you seeing. And so they want
people with a straight poker face who
have seen this a lot of times and are
not watching it happen to their wife and
baby, you know, so it's a reasonable
ask. But so I go I go out and I'm in the
the hallway in the maternity ward at
Lennox Hill Hospital and I'm just and it
just hit me. It was like for the first
time I guess I had not really thought
about this. I was just so excited to get
my family started. But for the first
time, it hit me that like something
could go
wrong and that I could leave here alone,
you know, like something could go wrong
that I could lose the baby, I could lose
my wife and it's totally out of my
control. And like as this started
hitting me, I started like really
getting emotional and um it's like I'm
out there and I'm like I'm crying in the
hallway of this maternity ward and
immediately I just started talking to
God. Um, and I just started uh not just
talking to God, but like negotiating
with God. And I was just like, you know,
like like, dear Lord, if you if you make
sure that they're okay, I'm going to do
like I'm going to be the best husband
and the best father and I will do this
and you know, like all the different
things in your life. Have you ever
prayed before? No. Never once in my
life. Um, and it all, you know, like all
the things that, you know, you're
supposed to be doing that you're not
doing that well, you know, like I was
like, "Okay, I'll clean this up. You
know, I'll call my mom more often. I'll
do this thing. I'll do. And so anyway,
so I just started like praying to God
and not just praying, but like
negotiating. So anyway, everything was
fine with that, but my my wife, this was
the first of many times. She had a very
there were a bunch of complications in
the pregnancy. Everyone came out okay,
thank God. Um but so I ended up talking
to God a lot that day. And then just
like as the days went on, it's so
interesting. It's just organic lifetime
of not believing and then you just
start. So this is almost like what
intellectually, you know, converted me
later was I was like, "Hey, what the
hell was that?" I mean, I could I can't
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one, you know, like again, I'm I'm
almost a little uncomfortable talking
about these things because I like
talking about things where I have like a
real tight argument that I can prove is
irrefutable. Profound argument actually.
It was something where I was like, look,
so in the moment when it was really all
on the line and out of my control, I
wasn't thinking maybe God exists. I knew
for a 100% certainty unlike nothing I've
ever known in my life. That not only did
I know that God existed, but I knew what
he wanted from me. Like I knew what my
negotiating power in this was. Is that I
could pro, you know what I'm saying?
Like I could promise I'll be a good
person. and all do. So, not only did I
know God existed, I knew that God wanted
me to be a good person and there was and
look, this is something that people who
have found God know and people who don't
believe in God maybe will not accept.
But there is something to when you open
yourself up like that to
God like you find out that he's real.
And I it's not like he speaks to you or
he hallucinates. I don't like see a
fiery bush and the words of God started
talking. But like he fills you like you
when you open yourself like that to it,
you get filled by it and there's no
there's no more debate in your mind over
whether that's a real phenomenon or not.
You're like any more than like if I were
to leave here and someone were to be
like, "Do you believe in Tucker
Carlson?" And like I'd be like, "No, I
know for certain like I know for a
certainty that Tucker Carlson exists. I
was just with him." It's it's like that.
And so it was um and it's never it's it
changed my life and ever since I'm I
regularly pray to God. It's something
I'm conscious of every single day. No
way. Um every day. Every day. And I
always I don't even pray exactly. Um I
don't ask for things ever. I ask for one
thing ever from God. Um which is that my
my wife and my kids are healthy and
safe. It's the only thing I ever pray
for. I don't ask for anything. The only
other thing that I do is I I um I
express gratitude. got like I just say
thank you for everything I have. So
that's but that's the extent of it. But
I think that I cannot overstate how much
I think that's made me a better person.
Really? Yeah. Just it's it's very very
good for you to constantly remind
yourself how lucky you are that you have
all the things that you have. It's it's
very easy to get away from that. And
that's where that's where you you ruin
your inner happiness, your inner joy is
if you start you start taking the things
you have for granted because once you
like, you know, once you when you think
you could lose everything you already
have and then you don't, that's when you
really appreciate it. You know, you
really appreciate what how lucky we all
are. Well, not to be like too blunt or
too personal, but you're on the cusp of
like change in your life on the basis of
what's happened in the last month in
your life. I've just seen this story so
many times. Yeah. So, to be vulgar, your
income in this year will be higher than
last year. I'm just telling you that
because you're way more famous and
you're also on the right side of
history, I think. Yeah, I hope so. And
uh and certainly on the right side of
popular opinion. So, like that. Do you
think I mean the danger in life is
getting what you want and finding
yourself unhappier? Are you worried
about that? No, I'm really not. Um, and
I do just think that it's because again,
if this was happening to me at 25 or at
30, I would be very concerned about that
danger. Literally, like what I just told
you is kind of already happened in my
life. I know who I am as a person. I
kind of know what money actually means.
It's like there's lots of nice things.
I'm not downplaying money. It's it's
very important, particularly in my
position. It's very important for me to
be able to protect my wife and kids that
we have some money, you know what I
mean? So that I can do that. Um, but no,
I'm not I'm really not worried about
that at this point. I think I've kind of
like my wife herself is a very grounding
force for me. She's the person whose
approval I seek. Yes. She's the person
whose opinion I really care about, you
know, and so like that's and and she
keeps me very grounded. Also, just as
you know, you know, having these little
kids just keeps you grounded because
they're uh they're they just don't care
at all at all. Like literally at all. To
my my six-year-old the other day, we
were out to dinner. Um and so we're out
to dinner. We're sitting down. my wife,
my my six-year-old girl, and my
three-year-old boy. And the uh the owner
of the restaurant is like a fan of mine.
So, he comes over to the table. He goes,
"Oh, thank you guys so much for coming.
I just wanted to shake your hand. I
really appreciate everything you're
doing." And I was like, "Oh, thank you
so much. I appreciate that." So, he
leaves. And then my daughter, my
six-year-old, who's kind of 17, but
she's six. She turns over at me and she
goes, "Why'd he come over and say hi to
you, Dad?" "Cuz you're famous." And just
looks and then just turned right back to
her menu. I mean, it was like she could
not have just undercut me more than
that. I was like, "Oh, I guess I'm not
really that cool." All right, I will.
But but that that stuff helps.
I'm really lucky that I didn't have this
moment 15 years ago that I had it now.
So, I think I think I'll be good. But
then, you know, you cut back to me in a
year, I come back here, I got like the
shades on or something. It's totally
ruined me. Pelgr not Perier.
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