This content humorously explores the T28 Super Heavy Tank, nicknamed the "Doom Turtle," highlighting its over-engineered design, unique history, and the absurdity of its existence as a personal favorite due to its sheer ridiculousness.
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sometimes I like to read several books
get in contact with historians that are
experts on the subject and make a pretty
serious video and other times I like to
get completely unhinged and rant about
some stuff that I think is funny and by
sometimes I mean I mean today right
now today we're talking about my
favorite tank ladies and gentlemen
America's only super heavy tank the T28
aka the Doom [Music]
[Music]
Turtle now I said this is my favorite
tank which is a completely
unquantifiable metric despite that
somebody in the comments is still going
to tell me that I'm wrong so if you
think I should have a different favorite
tank go ahead and tell me about it in
the comments below and maybe I'll do a
video about that one too okay just to be
clear when it comes to me and things
like tanks and planes and guns favorite
is not the best it's not the most
impactful it's not the most historically
relevant it's just the coolest SL
dumbest one around and in my opinion
this is it so let's go ahead and get
into this right after a awkwardly
Relevant Word from our sponsors this
video is brought to you by War Thunder
they've got over 25 200 tanks planes and
ships pretty much every military vehicle
from World War II until modern times
including all the cool weird and obscure
ones that may have never even actually
seen combat for example let's say that I
wanted to be the T28 aka the Doom Turtle
America's only super heavy tank I can do
that then I can go over to x-ray mode
look at all the different components
check out all the specs actually learn
about the tank then I can hop over and I
can customize it because let's face it I
don't just want to be the Doom Turtle I
want to be the Doom Turtle covered in
bushes so I can try to sneak up on the
enemy like I'm a 200,000 lb Wy coyote
with 105 mm Howitzer for a nose then we
throw an American flag on one side side
some smack talk on the other and now
we're ready to go play the game now once
we start playing the cool part is that
it's not like a lot of other games where
you just shoot at the other enemy tank
and a hit is a hit no matter where it
lands no in War Thunder you can take out
individual components of the enemy tank
for example let's say there was a guy on
a mobile artillery piece and that one
guy in particular was talking smack you
can address him individually or maybe
you're approaching an enemy tank and you
fire but your shell doesn't get
penetration and now it takes a while to
reload so you just open fire with your
50 cal right through the window slit
giving their driver a nice Al face high
five then once you get the gun reloaded
you can finish taking out the rest of
the crew or sometimes you just get that
lucky shot where the shell goes straight
through the enemy tank and detonates
their ammunition and the best part about
all this is that it's free to play on PC
PlayStation and Xbox so if you wanted to
give it a try we'll have a link in a
discount code in the description down
below and when you use my link you're
going to get all kinds of freebies to
get you started off on the right foot
let's get back to the video all right
the Doom Turtle it is a World War II era
tank that was designed for one reason
and one reason only and that is to punch
through the German Sig freed line if you
don't know the Sig freed line is
Germany's western border where they have
essentially tried to fortify it to make
it impenetrable to the Allied Forces
approaching so that they can't break
into Germany it is approximately 400
miles of concrete pyramids known as
Dragon's Teeth making it some tanks and
other Allied Vehicles can't pass through
then on the other side of the Dragon's
Teeth you typically had other things
that were meant to stop foot soldiers
like Moes barbwire booby traps and on
the other side of those was over 18,000
bunkers with machine gun mortar and
artillery positions that were going to
in theory be able to mow down any Ally
trying to advance through those
obstacles now the American Military and
government knew about the Sig freed line
pretty much the entire time because
German propaganda told him about it and
impenetrable so the American Military in
1943 is like okay we're going to come up
on the Sig freed line eventually let's
go ahead and get a plan in the works on
how we're going to address it once we
get there now clearly that plan should
not rely on tanks right I mean that's
kind of the Sig freed Line's entire Mo
it was designed built and implemented
with the sole purpose of stopping tanks
we should probably do anything other
than use tanks right wrong completely
wrong American Engineers got told that
Germans built an impenetrable tank
fortification and they're like [ __ ]
bet we'll see about that we're going to
build a bigger better tank that's going
to drive right [ __ ] through it
America [ __ ] yeah so the engineers got
to work this is called the at project
and what they came up with was surely
there's spots along the Sig freed line
where the German military has a gap
where they can drive their vehicles
through right has to be there they can't
just have 400 miles and they drive all
the way around there's got to be points
where you can pass through it and
obviously those points of Passage are
going to be the most fortified positions
right they're essentially going to make
a fatal funnel a choke point where all
of the Allied Forces have to try to go
through a narrow passageway and on the
other side it's going to be loaded with
German 88 anti-tank guns German
artillery machine guns mortars
everything they're going to be able to
slaughter anybody that tries to make it
through that little tiny narrow passage
to which the American Engineers are like
cool obvious solution we're just going
to make a tank that can can't die okay
it's going to be so heavily armored that
there's no anti-tank weapon or artillery
piece known to man that could kill it
then we're going to put a gun on it
that's so big that it can shoot through
concrete bunkers and take out the enemy
we're literally going to drive this
gigantic heavily armored tank directly
into the enemy choke point stand there
take all their anti-tank fire be
Untouchable and then we're going to
return fire and kill them first okay do
you understand how gangster that is this
is this is the ultimate dad dick
maneuver just straight up like I know
exactly what you're plan is I know what
you want me to do so that you can beat
me I'm going to do it anyways and I'm
still going to win because [ __ ] you so
they made the Doom Turtle the T28
America's only super heavy tank this
thing is 36 ft long 10 ft tall and 14 ft
wide it has 12 in of armor on the front
and it's weighing in 95 tons okay approximately
approximately
210,000 lb okay the human mind can't
comprehend how heavy this tank actually
is it literally weighs as much as a blue
whale which also isn't helpful cuz most
people haven't seen her blue whale okay
so it's like what's my
calculator Toyota Corolla is like 3,000
lb okay it's like 70 Toyota Corollas
okay this entire thing is like an entire
parking lot got a gun stra to it and now
it's coming to kill the enemy speaking
of gun they went with5 mm gun okay that
is field grade artillery this is
literally a Howitzer that they strap to
the front of this metallic blue whale
okay if you're not picking up what I'm
putting down I'm trying to tell you this
thing is basically the Norwall of death
all right which raises a question why on
Earth did they go with with the Doom
turtle and not the Norwall of death well
well it's because this thing's slow as
[ __ ] which is really the downfall of
this tank because somebody basically
said hey we're going to build a 200,000
lb tank and then we're going to put the
same V8 engine in it that the M4
Shermans have yeah the Doom turtle is
rocking a 500 horsepower v8 Ford engine
okay just for the record if you don't
know much about engines or horsepower
Dodge is out here making minivans with
1,000 horsepower that weigh 5,000 lb and
the dod thought it would be a good idea
to stick a 500 horsepower v8 inside of a
tank that weighs as much as a blue whale
okay the Doom turtle is coming at you at
the speed of mock potato pedal to the
metal balls to the wall this thing maxes
out at 8 m an hour so clearly they're
going to have to transport this thing
all the way to the Sig freed line right
if they land this thing on a beach in
Normandy and let it drive all the way
across France it's going to take like 3
years to get there and this is actually
why the Doom Turtle has a unique look of
having four sets of tracks instead of
just two very wide sets of tracks like a
normal super heavy tank would and that's
because those two outermost tracks come
off and SE seate from the Doom Turtle
allowing it to be easier to transport
both because now the Doom Turtle isn't
as wide and it comes apart in three
separate chunks making it all weigh
significantly less than the original 95
tons so they've got it all figured out
and by 1945 they start manufacturing
these things originally they're planning
on making 25 of them they figure that'll
be enough to punch through the Sig freed
line but they build two prototypes first
so they get those prototypes built then
they're testing the first one and the V8
engine that's trying to move 200,000 lb
obviously catches fire burns out the ENT
entire inside of the tank the entire
thing is essentially a total loss and
while that was going on the Allied
Forces managed to penetrate the Sig
freed line how on Earth did they do that
without the Doom Turtle you ask well a
the Sig freed line wasn't really all it
was cracked up to be according to the
German propaganda it definitely was not
impenetrable it was underman it just
wasn't as good as it was made out to be
so they just went and they sent out
Recon and they found a couple of spots
where they weren't well covered by like
artillery and machine guns and booby
traps and then they just put a bulldozer
out and pushed dirt over the top of the
dragon's teeth and then drove right over
the top got Behind Enemy Lines and took
everybody out yeah the Germans spent God
knows how much money and man- hours
building this 400 m stretch of concrete
booby traps and they got outdone by a
couple of rednecks with a bulldozer out
so because of that the Doom Turtle
simply just wasn't needed anymore so
they stopped the project there was one
surviving prototype they gave that over
to Aberdine Proving Ground and they used
that basically as a giant weight to test
Transportation equipment because well it
was the heaviest tank they had and if it
could move the Doom Turtle it could move
anything else so they used it for that
for a little while then one day somebody
just parked in a field and everybody
forgot about it a little while after
that people started asking questions
historians the public museums like Hey
where's that badass tank we want to
preserve it we want to save it it's a
part of History we want to stick it in
our Museum let me have it so I can take
care of it and the arm is like I don't
know bro we lost it okay now on one hand
to be fair I'm pretty sure I know
exactly how this happened they just like
had a couple of dudes go park it they
made it take all day they parked it off
in a field those dudes like retired they
left they moved on and then nobody
remembered where it got parked okay like
I'm sympathetic to that I understand how
it happened but on the other hand how
the [ __ ] do you lose a 200,000 lb tank
that there's only one of like I would
understand if you were like oh hey we
misplaced a Sherman tank because America
made like 50,000 of them right but no
this isn't a Sherman tank it's twice the
size of a Sherman tank and there's only
one of them okay you could park it in a
parking lot full of tanks and you would
still be able to find it how on Earth
did you manage to lose a blue whale with
a gun attached to it okay okay Dude
Where's My Car where's your car
dude dude where's my car so that's it
it's just gone it's miia for the next 27
years nobody has any clue where this
thing is at and then one day some Hunter
is out in the woods near a military base
hunting and he's like hey there's a
bushes dude there's your car yeah you
guys thought I was being silly earlier
with that War Thunder ad didn't you when
I stuck a couple of bushes on this giant
tank and pretended like that was going
to conceal it well history is on my side
now because this [ __ ] was Incognito for
27 years because it had a couple of
bushes on it what now so the hunter goes
to the Army he's like hey I found this
weird looking tank in the bushes and
they're like oh [ __ ] we've been looking
for that thing so the Army then takes
the tank they give it to a museum in
Fort Knox so it's on display there for a
little while and then they decide
they're going to move it from Fort Knox
to Fort Benning or Fort more freedom
whatever the [ __ ] it's supposed to be
called now the home of the Infantry they
decide they're going to move it to the
Infantry Museum at the home of the
Infantry so they throw it on the hat
trailer The Heavy equipment trailer and
they tow it all the way to Georgia while
they're Towing it there apparently they
take a turn too hard and it breaks the
chains off the Head trailer and the
entire main cab of the tank flies into
the ditch now granted it was just the
main cab of the Doom Turtle so it didn't
have the two outermost tracks which is
like a significant amount of weight but
still the main cab is 60 tons flying off
your trailer into the ditch so that's
terrifying obviously the Doom Turtle
completely fine the paint got scuffed no
big deal get it back on the trailer they
get it where it's going now here's my
issue I know for a fact that the are
pictures of the Doom turtle in a ditch
somewhere in Georgia I need those
pictures someone has them on their cell
phone this happened in like 2017 2018
2019 somewhere around there I know one
of the drivers in that Convoy took a
picture of it with their smartphone it
has to have happened I want that picture
for history so I can get it to the
museum okay get me that picture what are
you waiting for Chinese New Year go go
go sorry so that's it that's that's the
end of the story they get it to the
National Infantry Museum and that is
where it is on display today so in
conclusion that's my favorite tank for
literally no reason other than it's
completely ridiculous and I think it's
funny literally from its Inception it
was just designed to be a giant middle
finger the enemy told America hey you
can't drive your tanks through here and
America said hold my defense budget and
watch this [ __ ] and this is the
monstrosity that they came up with okay
I don't know if you can give a tank
steroids or even test a tank for
steroids but if you can test that one
first now is it unfortunate that I never
saw combat yeah absolutely it's cool to
think about if it did however that
serves to highlight one of the most
important lessons that I teach on this
channel and that is is that the only
thing scarier than engineers and defense
contractors with an unlimited budget is
a bunch of infantry men on the ground
with time on their hands cuz that's what
actually gets [ __ ] done thank you for
watching best way to support the channel
is go by some merch over the fat
out man only the government could lose a
200,000 lb tank for 27 years currently
still be missing six nuclear warheads
and then tell me how dark I'm allowed to
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