0:01 What do you think happens when a
0:03 narcissist collapses? Uh, they do not
0:05 simply vanish into thin air. They don't
0:07 die. They don't sit in silence and
0:10 reflect, regret the harm they cause. No,
0:12 what actually happens is far darker and
0:15 far more predictable. They migrate. They
0:18 move from one stage to another. They
0:21 drag their false self into new arenas,
0:23 trying desperately to keep the show
0:26 alive. Collapse does not bring humility
0:27 to these people. It brings new
0:30 disguises. They look for any place that
0:32 will tolerate them, feed them, or at the
0:36 very least give them an audience. And
0:38 these are not abstract or symbolic
0:40 places I'm talking about. They're real.
0:43 You may pass them every single day. They
0:46 exist in our cities, our communities, or
0:48 our neighborhood. You may even see
0:50 people who look like saints, marters,
0:53 victims, or visionaries standing in
0:56 these spaces. But behind the costume
0:58 lies the same hunger for validation,
1:01 control, and power. Collapsed
1:04 narcissists do not stop performing. They
1:06 simply change the backdrop. Some of
1:10 these places are unexpected. They appear
1:14 safe, respectable, or even sacred. Yet,
1:15 if you pay attention, you will notice
1:18 the same patterns of entitlement,
1:21 manipulation, and self-pity replaying
1:23 themselves over and over again. Others
1:26 are obvious, noisy, even vulgar. But in
1:28 both cases, the story is the same. A
1:31 person who has lost access to supply is
1:34 now scavenging in new ways. Still
1:36 clinging to their false self, still
1:38 avoiding the one thing they will never
1:41 do. What is that? Change. I'm Danish, a
1:42 narcissistic abuse recovery
1:44 professional. Welcome to my channel. The
1:47 topic for today is seven real places
1:50 collapsed narcissists go. One quick
1:52 reminder before we get started. Only 60
1:54 seats are left at an early but prize for
1:56 the workshop I'm hosting on overcoming
1:58 betrayal trauma after narcissistic
2:01 abuse. If you want to book your spot and
2:03 learn how to heal from this kind of a
2:05 wound, click the link in my description
2:09 or the I button above. Now, let's begin.
2:12 Number one, therapy. When you see a
2:15 narcissist in therapy, do not assume
2:17 it's because they have woken up to their
2:20 damage. They have not. Therapy becomes
2:23 their replacement stage. As I said, once
2:25 their supply dries up, they walk into
2:27 that office not to heal but perform.
2:29 They want someone to listen endlessly,
2:32 to affirm their victim story, to nod
2:35 along as they explain how everyone
2:38 misunderstood them, abandoned them, or
2:41 betrayed their brilliance. They pressure
2:44 therapists into reviving their false
2:46 self, demanding sympathy while refusing
2:49 accountability. If the therapist dares
2:51 to reflect the truth back, the
2:53 narcissist retaliates, mocking their
2:55 credentials, attacking their
2:57 intelligence, and trying to drag them
3:01 down. Very few ever show real change. I
3:03 do not know of even a single collapsed
3:05 narcissist who went to therapy and
3:08 showed real consistent change. These
3:10 people treat therapy like a mirror that
3:13 must reflect their greatness back to
3:15 them, not a tool for growth. They want
3:18 to vomit their story, not transform it.
3:20 And unfortunately, these unaware
3:22 therapists just fall prey to their
3:25 tactics because they play the same old
3:26 game, silent treatment, passive
3:29 aggression. It becomes so toxic to deal
3:32 with that ultimately the poor therapist
3:34 has to end the relationship. Which is
3:37 why you will see most therapists do not
3:40 work with narcissists. Even those who
3:43 are aware and say, "I would like to
3:46 change." Number two, social services.
3:49 The older or semi collapsed narcissist
3:52 often finds their new supply in social
3:55 services. They volunteer, fund raise or
3:57 campaign for causes that attract a lot
4:00 of admiration. They pose as protectors
4:02 of animals, champions of women or
4:04 defenders of children. They know the
4:07 world will clap for anyone who holds a
4:09 sign, rescues a dog, or raises money for
4:12 a shelter. On the surface, they look
4:14 saintly. An old man raising money for
4:16 domestic violence survivors. Think about
4:19 that. Or an old woman photographed with
4:21 rescued puppies. But beneath the banner,
4:23 the same hunger is at work. They feed
4:26 off the admiration, manipulate
4:28 volunteers, and siphon resources for
4:31 themselves. The charity is not about the
4:33 cause. It's about their image. The
4:35 collapsed narcissist turns social
4:39 service into selfservice. Number three,
4:41 religious institutions. This one is big.
4:44 One of the most common refuges for a
4:47 collapsed narcissist is religion. They
4:50 dawn the costume of devotion. They
4:53 change their appearance, perform the
4:55 rituals, and flood conversations with
4:57 scripture and sermons. For example, a
4:59 Muslim narcissist may suddenly grow a
5:02 long beard, wear a cap, and pray five
5:04 times a day. A Christian narcissist may
5:07 attend every church service loudly
5:09 invoking the Trinity. From the outside
5:12 it looks like transformation but is it?
5:14 You need to watch closely. The
5:17 entitlement and the arrogance seeps
5:19 through. They never leave. God becomes a
5:21 tool of control and extension of their
5:23 ego. They don't worship with love. They
5:26 weaponize faith. They preach morality
5:28 while practicing manipulation. They use
5:31 religion as a shield against
5:33 accountability and as a sword to
5:36 dominate others. Their god is not god at
5:38 all. It is their ego dressed in holy
5:42 clothes. Number four, hospice. Hospice
5:44 care strips away filters and what
5:47 remains is raw character. When a
5:50 narcissist faces terminal illness, you
5:52 may expect them to soften, to mellow
5:55 down. Instead, many intensify. They bark
5:57 orders at nurses, humiliate caretakers,
5:59 and demand impossible attention.
6:01 Families are divided. Wills are
6:05 rewritten. and drama becomes their last
6:08 performance. It's not uncommon for dying
6:11 narcissists to summon old rivals just to
6:13 gloat or cause fresh wounds. Even as
6:16 life slips away, they cling to control.
6:18 They rage at the limits of their body,
6:20 rage at the loss of power and rage at
6:23 the people who dare not obey. Rarely
6:26 there's a glimpse of honesty. But in
6:28 most cases, the collapse in hospice is
6:31 not humility. It is cruelty unmasked
6:33 carried all the way to the grave. There
6:35 are so many hospice nurses sharing their
6:37 experiences online talking about how
6:40 they had to deal with these monsters and
6:43 how their narcissism becomes magnified
6:45 when they are approaching death. Number
6:48 five, courtrooms. When the social stage
6:50 is gone, the courtroom becomes a new
6:53 arena. Collapsed narcissists thrive on
6:56 conflict, on drama, and the legal system
6:58 provides endless opportunities.
7:01 Unfortunately, they file complaints for
7:03 petty issues. They sue neighbors,
7:06 exartners, or even strangers. They draft
7:09 page after page of accusations,
7:11 convinced that the world owes them
7:14 victory. In court, they posture as the
7:17 righteous victim, demanding recognition,
7:19 trying to drain others time and
7:21 resources. Winning matters, that is what
7:23 it is all about. But even losing can be
7:26 twisted into supply. It proves the
7:28 system is corrupt, that they are the
7:31 misunderstood hero battling injustice.
7:33 For them, the courtroom is not about
7:36 justice. It's about attention, drama,
7:39 and the illusion of power. Number six,
7:42 pubs and clubs. Collapse does not always
7:45 look like despair. Sometimes it looks
7:47 like intoxication. When silence becomes
7:50 unbearable, pubs and clubs provide
7:53 distraction. Alcohol, drugs, gambling,
7:55 and night life all serve as quick
7:57 escapes, distractions from reality. They
7:59 drown their emptiness in noise, neon
8:02 lights, and fleeting pleasures. You will
8:05 see them throwing money around, buying
8:08 admiration, and treating people as toys.
8:11 They chase dopamine hits, fast highs
8:14 that vanish as quickly as they come.
8:16 Beneath the loud music and laughter is
8:19 the same hollowess, the same refusal to
8:21 sit with reality. The more collapsed
8:24 they are, the harder they party because
8:27 silence is too close to truth. Number
8:30 seven and the last one, social media,
8:33 the digital throne. Social media is
8:36 where you will find a lot of collapsed
8:38 narcissists because they reinvent
8:39 themselves with a camera and a Wi-Fi
8:42 connection. They shout into the void and
8:45 the algorithm unfortunately rewards
8:47 them. Outrage, superiority, and
8:50 performance attract followers. No matter
8:53 how hollow and useless the content is,
8:56 they curate perfect images, luxury cars,
9:00 lavish weddings, expensive rings, and
9:02 staged events. They rant with big words
9:05 trying to sound profound. They mask
9:08 their emptiness with volume. Many build
9:09 armies of followers who mirror their
9:12 brokenness back to them. Misogynistic
9:14 men follow other misogynistic men.
9:17 Insecure people gather under leaders who
9:20 preach arrogance as wisdom. The
9:22 narcissist thrives here because social
9:25 media unfortunately offers applause
9:27 without intimacy. No one sees behind the
9:30 curtain the wheel. Only the performance
9:32 is projected. And for a collapsed
9:35 narcissist that is enough to keep the
9:37 false self breathing. Now, let's bring
9:39 it all together. Collapsed narcissists
9:43 do not vanish. They reinvent. They seek
9:45 new stages where their hunger can hide
9:47 behind respectability, charity,
9:50 religion, illness, legality, pleasure,
9:52 and performance. You may see them in
9:55 therapy, in service, in faith, in
9:58 hospice, in courtrooms, in clubs or or
10:00 even on your screen. They do not stop
10:02 being narcissist though. They simply
10:05 relocate their drama. If you have
10:07 recognized these patterns, know this,
10:09 their collapse is not your closure.
10:11 Their collapse is their migration. Your
10:14 closure comes when you step out of their
10:17 performance and choose your own reality.
10:18 And if you want to go deeper into
10:22 healing from betrayal trauma, the kind
10:25 that leaves you doubting your worth and
10:28 struggling to trust again, remember only
10:31 60 seats remain for the workshop at the
10:33 early bird price. The link is in the description.
10:34 description.
10:37 Sign up right now. I will talk to you in
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