The content is a reflective conversation with an actress discussing her career, creative process, and personal connections forged through her work, emphasizing the enduring impact of storytelling and community.
Mind Map
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I like it's just you know bake me
delicious gluten-free brownies let me
tell you yes the kid can
bake so the process when it works is of
course to not be panicked I I found a
lot of um support in having community of
any kind like I uh have a couple of
different writers groups um one is a
Wednesday night at Wednesday day at a
friend's house which ends up being like
89% gossip and like 11% working but that
11% is actually something to hang your
hat on and I
find the way my mind works as a writer
is similar to the way it is uh when I'm
preparing a role and it's just to check
in like if you speak to your characters
they will speak back to you if you leave
them alone for days at a time it's like
picking up a conversation an old thread
that that you sort of forget where you
are so any anything to get yourself in
the habit of working a little bit every
day on a timer um just one page you know
it's it all kind of helps keep the
momentum so would you say that your your
work is an actor and your life is an
actor that same creative impulse is it
similar to the one when you're telling
stories and writing essays and novels I
think so and it all came um as a kid I
was a big reader and just the way I
experienced what I read
imaginatively felt similar to when I
first um started as an actor and I think
it is all for me just it's
storytelling um I remember there there
was a commercial at the time for fake
butter that um was there was like a a a
Greek goddess in it or mother nature and
when she finds out that the big butter
is not real butter she says it's not
nice to fool mother nature and I was
given that line in a school play when I
was like in second grade and I got a
laugh a better laugh than here
here
and pretending that don't remember that
commercial and I know a lot of you
do and um and I just remember thinking
that was such a powerful not even a
powerful feeling it was just such a
connection with a story and a character
I was playing and um so yeah it is
connected to me um I uh I didn't realize
until we were on the road with this I
learned about your first commercial yes
I'm going there could you could you tell
us about that experience cuz I want to
hear those lines again out of your mouth
uh I was first cast in a commercial for
um Walmart
sweaters where thank you
nights so someone needs to find that on
the internet I want to see it I always
say you know there were a lot of people
I went to theater school and um some of
the actors I came up with didn't feel
like commercials were a good use of
their time and talent and I think it was
such good practice like I used to teach
a little acting class back to my grad
school where I would say one of the
hardest lines to say in the English
language is not from Shakespeare it's
welcome to Chili's because it's so hard
to strike the balance of like friendly
but not making fun of it but not insane
but not hating the job but not like it's
so many things you know well I had was
in a Chi-Chi's commercial and I had to
say welcome to the fiesta and after a
while you just don't know what you're
saying anymore and then they cut me out
of it because the director said I didn't
have enough boyish enthusiasm
I don't mean to make this about me but I
have I have issues I need to discuss
with the
public well speaking of the book um
there is a let's call it a character in
here named old lady Jackson who is a
friend of mine if when or if you've read
the book or when you do you'll know
about her um she has a good friend we
call Uncle pea pancake and they very
much enjoy a 400 p.m. dinner time uh can
you tell us about how that character
started in your life Lady it's so
embarrassing um but so when I started on
Parenthood it was the first time I was
playing a mom who would not have had the
child as a teenager and I very much
wanted my TV kids who are still two of
my dearest friends May Whitman and Miles
Heiser I really wanted them to um think
I was really hip and cool which is
something that hip and cool people don't
need and I so and I found myself kind of
being mommyish to them and they were so
young and we started and but I didn't
want to play like I wanted to be like
one of their peers kind of so I was like
started I created a character that I'd
be like hey I mean I don't care if you
get a another tattoo but old lady
Jackson might think a 12 is too many and
so I and of course they saw through it
immediately because they're genuinely hi
and cool and they were like oh old lady
Jackson thinks so and so it became kind
of a in in our lives and then may always
says that she's old lady Jackson because
we've both been in Show Business the
same amount of time she started at age
five with like a chicken nugget
commercial and um so yeah so now I don't
know old lady Jackson is like and we do
genuinely go to dinner at 4 I Blame You
well as we get older uh this passage I'm
about to read from your book which I
think is really beautiful um as soon as
I find it please talk among
yourselves but silently no um this I
just wanted to read this because I it
really this is crazy why is this
happening you know why this is happening
here and I'll have to hear about it
later so this is from the essay of Lady
Jackson um and it's I think it's lovely
it's very useful to always have a friend
who is much older and one who much
younger the older friend will remind you
what there is to look forward to and the
younger friend will keep you telling
your stories over again so you'll
remember not to forget them an older
friend will tell you you have plenty of
time yet and a younger friend will make
you forget time altogether because when
you're with them you'll feel even for a
moment that you're the exact same
honey something I did not imagine or
plan for but that is an incredible
benefit of the work I've gotten to do is
is kind of the families you make along
the way and I have so many friends who
are not my age who are much younger who
much older and I have such appreciation
for that um I don't know it does it just
keeps me connected to all those ages
well speaking of that I think the
Gilmore Girls fans here will be happy to
hear me say these two words and I want
Bishop well that's Kelly is a great
example of someone who I don't know how
many of you have just like a friend
who's 80 but I just was at Kelly's 80th
birthday and she's I know and she's um
there were all these pictures of her um
you know she was Sheila in the chorus
line on Broadway she won the attorney
and just pictures of her with like her
leg up in the air and you know just um
she's just an incredible person and she
her training was as a dancer um
and this is true for most of the dancers
I've known just incredible discipline
always prepared never complains and was
always such a big supporter of mine and
and always kind of bossy with me which I
I don't have a lot of bossy friends and
you know I tell her about some date I
went on she'd be like well he sounds
terrible lose his number like oh oh I
you're probably right but then but then
but then like at 2 in the morning
sometimes if we'd be at work late she'd
just come over to me her perfect posture
and she'd be like do you want to split a
bag of
Cheetos I was like Kelly you're bad she'
like split a little like mini bag of
Cheetos um so she's just been such a
special great friend and she has a book
coming out called the third Gilmore
scared because she does not give a
and I'm like I don't know what I
mean not I I feel safe but also scared
wait well speaking of people that we
idolize and look up to uh one of the
first movies I think I saw you in
and it was your second film and you
worked with Merill stre I mean that's
crazy yeah I was thank you Merl thank
you she coms to all our show she's kind
of a stalker
whatever what was that experience like
I've had several experiences where I met
a hero where I just was unprepared and
and I I was like the I was just out of
my mind the entire time like I don't
think there was ever a time when wasn't
like that's Merl street right there Merl
Street she's in a scene with me I'm in a
scene with Merl Street which is like so
bad as an actor because of course that's
you shouldn't have that through line um
but it was also Renee zigger's uh first
movie after Jerry McGuire it was just it
was My One True Thing One True Thing
yeah based on an Anna quinland book um
but it was very uh in the movie it's
about this mother daughter relationship
and Merl's character against cancer and
it's a very dark kind of um story and we
were shooting in New Jersey winter time
at a big house drafty older house and it
was um you know sometimes the tone of
the story like
takes takes uh it colors the the set and
so it was kind of a subdued set anyway
and usually the way you start your day
is um you just do kind of a read through
of the scene so that the crew knows
what's happening and so for lighting and
and so we're just casual um doing a
readr and there had been this terrible
flu going around and Merl starts and she
is can barely speak and I was like oh
gosh it's these days are so long and
it's going to be such a hard day and
poor thing of course she's coming to
work anyway cuz she's Bar Street and um
she's like choking through her scene and
then at the end um she was like hey does
anybody see my crossw word puzzle and I
acting I I was sitting this far away
from her and I completely believed she
was Ill because she's playing someone who's
who's
ill and then even her like morning readr
was like
A++ um and then I remember we were at
the premiere after the movie had
finished and um I hadn't seen her for a
while and um she kind of pulled me aside
in the crowd and she was like you know I
just saw the movie and I want you to
know um that as an actor she said to me
what because still I was so freaked out
to be getting a compliment from Merl
Street like the blood was pounding in my
ears and I she's just telling me I'm a
good listener and I can't understand her
eyes she was just as lovely as you would
heard me oh one day one day um I for one
and I'm sure there's a lot of people
here that feel the same way I wish you
would sing
more so you got a lovely voice I sound
like you're surely to playing in
Postcards From The Edge you have a
lovely voice just use it more um but
that brings me to Zoe's extraordinary
playlist which I led I did too what was
that experience like it was insane this
is why Musical TV shows don't last is
they're so they're so expensive they're
impossible and that I was so glad Jane
L's a very dear friend of mine and she
asked me to be on it and I was so glad
to be there um but you're singing
dancing plus working 14 hour regular TV
show day and she Jane is like Jane
played soccer in college she's like an
incredible athlete and she could learn a
dance in four seconds but it's just um
it's just difficult and plus I had been
on Broadway but I I have a very I can't
sing Everything pop music is really hard
it's deceptively hard um but it was a
cool thing to be able to do and um just
things like you'd record the song and
then you had to lips sync to yourself
like I had never done that before yes I
know um except for bernardette Peters
was a guest star and she sang Live which
you can't always do for the sound mix
and everything else but um they had her
sing um um live because she's for at
Peters exactly so also all the
choreography and you have to learn that
so quickly that just it's blows me away
yeah so how soon before those dance
numbers did you have to learn those
dances I mean sometimes on the day
because you you'd mark it in like a
stage or something but frequently we
were on location and so in Canada in
Canada in Canada my
love and um so it would be like tape on
the floor to say okay here's where the
stairs are going to be or here's where
the wall is and then you get to the
location you'd be like wait the stairs
in the wall or where like so you were
kind of relearning the routine every
time you did it it was a lot wow um so
thank you for that um what you're on
Instagram now what happens what's going
on listen guys I like to really make
sure something's going to catch on
before I join 20 years later um I yes I
I don't know just Twitter became
silliness and um I do like having a way
to speak to people and tell them what
we're doing and um but I still it takes
me like an hour and a half to do every
post and I'm like terribly I'm afraid
like I'm going to send out like my
contact list or something like I don't I
like don't understand what is happening
so we had a few tutorials on the road in
between things and it's for once in my
life I'm like I know kid right once my
life I'm like I got it I'll show you
I'll show you you're good at it well
well it's the only thing I'm good at I
mean speaking of old lady Jackson it's
like it's a real old lady Jackson moment
when you're like I don't understand
these filters but I'll get it I always
say like the biggest difference between
us is you are not a showof and I am a
showof so I'm happy to show you how to
show off more um do you get recognized a
lot when you're out out um yes but I
here for the next generation of Gil War
girls people because they they just
don't stop I mean now I'm meeting wom
women mainly but people who are like and
then I introduced my daughter and soon
it's like the daughter's daughter and
then like it's only a matter of time
before some child is going to be like
so cuz I'm frozen in time there but you
know but so yes I get recognized
sometimes and then sometimes people say
do you know who you look
like I've been there for that yeah I I I
I really don't know what to say I guess
yes I do and then I had a weird thing um
this year you know I go to these like
spa places sometimes I don't know why
you feel better for like 24 hours and
then you're like Burger anybody and but
so I was at this fancy spot and I was
having massage and it was guy and first
talk he public service announcement but
anyway he was nice and he he he said you
know he's like giving my massage this is
typing and
massaging and he said you know um they
tell us a lot of celebrities come
here and I was like mhm he he said but
any face down yeah I'm face down and
familiar and I was like so I'm naked and
I'm face
down it's my back that [Applause]
[Applause]
is so I don't know it's taking
it's not even no Sam come on um I have
some questions for you but then we're
going to move on to some audience
questions okay um uh what is your
favorite T reality TV show oh no what
what would would you like to be on like
what TV reality show would you like to
be on as a contestant I wish I were good
enough to be on Great British baking I
love it so much it's the most soothing I
wish we could just all live in that tent
dude they have like celebrity American
ones it's not the come on we need to be
British okay fa enough you can do
accents I think there's a scheme I have
a scheme we're going to get you on there
um what what are your favorite books
right now what are you reading right now
I um just finished this book The
beasting which is
unbelievable um got a clap got one clap
it's long it's Irish it's a
dysfunctional Irish family in early 2000
I'm reading uh lady tan circle of women
right now
so good um and what's the Vietnam one
you were reading on the road the women
okay yeah the women is wonderful you
know she doesn't need my help it's like
number one everywhere but it's so
harrowing it was like I I kept saying I
was going to put it down because it's
war and we have enough of that but it's
it was beautifully written now if you
couldn't be an actor anymore be an
entertainment business what do you think
you would like to
do um I I'm very Housey I like
decorating things I don't have anything
to decorate right now and I feel lost
I'm just like going to other people's
houses and like let me rearrange this
for you I I would flip houses or do
something in that space I guess okay all
right I'll accept that ma'am thank you
um we're going to go to some of these
questions from you guys uh that we had
to rewrite from the computer oh okay did
your editor on this book want you to cut
something that you really wanted to
leave in if so who won the battle oh I
um uh I think a good editor kind of
takes what you have given them and
invites more actually um especially when
I worked with Jen and Smith on um
talking to St I can and the novel you
just get kind of a secondhand and she
would just say like more here or there
are all these sort of phrases of like
she's like I really feel like you could
stick The Landing a little better you
know sort of metaphors for like meaning
it needs like a cleaner ending or one
more sentence and um so no there wasn't
anything to cut I don't think I was
encouraged on this book
to go a little deeper I try in my essays
to mainly be entertaining but I did um
write about my mom a little bit for the
first time partially because my mom
passed at 61 but her mom my grandmother
Liv Liv to 101 and I know and she just
passed like a year ago and I while she
was alive I didn't want to write about
my mom was too painful for her so I
wrote about it a little bit in the Mochi
chapter the Mochi yes um uh this is
reminds me that you're also moving into
screenwriting now want talk about that a
little bit I well so Jen Smith editor of
many of my books and I um have now
adapted several of her books um they
haven't been made yet but we have one we
we have we've gotten pretty far I'm
excited I'm excited we kind of covered
this already but have you gotten a sneak
peak at Kelly Bishop book no but she
just asked me to blurb it which I will
happily do and I said send please send
me the manuscript and she's like oh
you're going to do it like a real
professional and I like
yes cuz spoiler alert sometimes people
just write a couple sentences and they
haven't really read it but I I I want to
read it um now we're getting into the
Gilmore Girls area um we we love to
watch Gilmore Girls and it is our
comfort show do you have your own
Comfort show that you go back to I think
of comfort show as something you can
have on in the background because you
already know what happens and it's just
like the sound of it is comforting um
and for me I guess to some degree that's
Sex in the City it's also there's so
many episodes and it just came out on
Netflix which I'm sure will revive it
for a whole new new um generation who
will probably find some of it troubling
but um
yes but um I also I just like anything
that's New York of another time and miss
the New York of more yellow taxis than
Ubers and just people you know Tootsie
and uh you know When Harry Met Sally and
um kind of Splash just like all those
kind of 80s movies and then weirdly and
I know this is a problem but I love
watching The Godfather over over I love
Godfather one and two and like if it's
on I just can't look away is that
comforting I don't
know when we were in Salt Lake City we
did the show we went back to the hotel
room and literally The Godfather was on
I was like guess what's
on nice and bloody lots of death okay um
once you get the idea for a book How
long does it take you to actually start
writing it it depends I think the essay
form speaks well to the way my mind
works which is kind of having an idea
that is a little more bite-sized rather
than Fiction just requires so much
structure and plot and
forethought and um like you know in this
book I was sitting with May Whitman one
day and she was saying um she was like I
need a better bra for work and I was
like well yeah you should just get a bra
you're not wearing one she's like no I
am wearing one and I was like you that's
not a bra that's like a a handkerchief
with like a fishing wire like what are
you talking about and I realized that
what I was used to just from coming to
LA in the '90s was like a Wonder Bra
that's like it's like like a you know it
has like a water bed in it but it's a
bra and like like the whole kind of
silhouette was this very like pumped up
kind of Pam Anderson Vibe and and that I
hadn't changed my thought of what a bra
was in a long time and so that led me to
this and it made me think what else
haven't I readjusted like um over time
and that led me to this essay boobs of
the90s which um which is kind of about
like just how values have changed and
also being asked to do um a topless
scene and saying no um oh right you talk
about that no
no you can read it oh that's right it's
in the book it's in the book um if I
this is from them not me if I wanted to
start a book club this week or maybe I
will too if I wanted to start a book
club this week what book should I
suggest in my
group uh I mean I don't know but I think
a book club to me says like 50% wine 50%
chitchat and um I think I really enjoyed
Tom Lake the latest an patchet book is
just I think very crowd-pleasing but
also there's a lot to talk about and her
writing is just really beautiful and um
what's the English Murders At a
retirement home oh um Thursday Murder
Club I love Thursday Murder Club so much
do you guys know
it there's a whole series right there's
a whole series which is really fun when
you fall in love with characters and
then you can kind of keep reading about
them and I've read it and now I'm
realizing it's gentle and soothing and
British but then there's like Mob
characters too yeah like the god father
exactly oh my
god wow you're complex lady um what
advice would you give to someone who
wants to be a writer but can't find the
motivation to put pen to
paper then do you really want to be a
writer um it's hard I don't know one
thing about having a community of
writers is taking solace in the fact
that very few people find it easy I have
a couple of friends who just churn Pages
out most of us sit and feel like why me
how I how dare I will anyone find this
interesting uh you know what will will
my family recognize themselves in these
Pages or there's so many ways to stop
yourself it's just as Jen always says
you know just get something down she
would always say I can't edit a blank
page even if something's terrible like
you can always revise it as long as you
fill up some pages right but you keep
telling me and I'm always like Okay um
oh this is interesting and because I
think a lot of people understand how
long things take when you're filming
them and this is how long did it take to
film an episode of Gil more girls uh
eight days but like 21 hours a day um
our hours were very long when we started
we actually shot on film and film takes
a it looks much better but it takes a
lot longer to light and um setups are
longer and you know some of that kind of
athletic we're talking quickly for 10
pag and it's one shot like my cousin
used to call me and be like why are you
circling the Gazebo again and it was
like we're running out of space like
we're just you know and and those that's
usually like a steady cam operator
walking backwards and so that person has
to not trip and we have to not drop a
line and somebody you know a plane goes
overhead it just would take many many
takes did you have one when everyone got
everything right and then the very last
second suck yes always always you like
it's almost the feeling of like holding
yes more Gilmore Girls I loved your
wardrobe in Gilmore Girls did you have
any part in choosing those clothes or
was it all done by the costume designer
and did you like the clothes I love them
I and yes I worked with the costume
designer I always thought um I wanted
things to have a sense of humor which is
why I'm wearing so many like t-shirts
with dog faces on them or whatever like
I just always wanted stuff that was felt
felt fun and and light um this is Mor
more girl um big fan of Palanka if you
were uh if you were name it just hit me
Palanka right if you were naming a dog
after celebrity who would you choose oh my
my
God I like I had a dog named Socks I
don't I don't know that I would go this
direction okay Joanie Mitchell is that
yeah you can pick whoever they don't
they're not okay okay um do you drive a
Jeep now
no no and we came back to do the show I
was like do I still have the same car
and she was like yeah and I was like is
it still that flesh color
yeah what is your favorite preparation
you um fries french fries I love you too
I know the aners french fries is first
Bak potato second where does MASH come
in uh oh yeah yeah see I keep forgetting
about mashed potatoes they're really
good wow Gil more girls is my comfort
show we did that one uh have you tracked
down that that have you tracked that
blue coat down yet no give it
back what was that story I had this quot
that I'd had from the initial series
that said property of Gilmer girl's
costumes on the back and I had stolen it
from work and then when we came back I
had as my set coat and um on the last
day I left it outside and it walked away
I know give it back and then they bought
me a nice new code but it wasn't my old
blue code um oi with the poodles
already that
question here's a question would you marry
oh how many cups of coffee do you
actually drink a day in current times two
two
okay what did we have two more and then
we have to wrap it up because this
lady's got to go somewhere um what
advice would you give 16-year-old Rory
in 2024 from
phone okay this is I think this is a
good one to end on if you were forced to
live the rest of your life as a
character you played on TV or in a movie
which character would you choose and
why Sue from Bad Santa
twist she's that's too hard a lifestyle
for me um it would be of course it would
be Laura Li I feel so honored to have
played her in the first place and to
been part of something that um has
brought people together and has given
people comfort and it just it was a joy
to play to pretend to be her I would
love to actually be her and um I just
have so much gratitude that we're still
here talking about it and um that I hear
such kind things from so many of you so
um I really really appreciate it thank
you so much and thanks for me today guys
leave another grand [Applause]
[Applause] [Music]
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