This content is a podcast episode featuring a conversation between Theo Von and comedian Andrew Santino. They discuss Santino's recent comedy special, "White Noise," his personal struggles during its taping, and various other topics ranging from current events and technology to personal philosophies and the nature of comedy.
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There are some new uh things in the
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club. A lot of uh new items in there and
um and thank you so much. Some people
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show. The ovonstore.com.
Uh thank you guys. Today's guest is a
comedian. He's an actor. He's a
podcaster. You know him from Whiskey
Ginger and Bad Friends. He has a new
special, White Noise, that's out on Hulu
right now. Today's guest is my friend,
Mr. Andrew Santino. Shine
on me
and I will find a [music] song. I've
>> What's up?
>> Good to see you, man.
>> Great to see you, bro. So good to see you.
you.
>> Good to
>> How are you feeling?
>> I'm feeling good, man. I'm feeling good,
dude. What's going on? I don't have to
tour anymore.
>> You're done. So,
>> for how long?
>> We might have to retape my special, but uh
uh
>> you want to talk about it on the show? >> Yeah,
>> Yeah,
>> I'm curious as
>> Are you?
>> Big time.
>> Yeah, I'm totally okay talking about it.
>> Yeah, I want to know.
>> Yeah. Well, so uh yeah, what do you want
to know?
>> So, like, you know, all I saw was what I
saw on the internet of the taping and
then I texted you and I was like, "How
are you? Are you good? What's going on?"
Because the internet likes to drum up >> nonsense.
>> nonsense.
>> Yeah. and you texted me some love back
and I just want to know how it went or
what was the deal like what was going
on, you know?
>> Yeah. I mean, well, when we left out of
there that night, we thought like it
went pretty good.
>> You felt good after it.
>> Yeah, I felt I was like I don't know if
we got it cuz there was definitely some
hang-ups. It was like I mean there was a
lot of stress like going into it, you
know, and I don't I don't know I don't
know if I want to go super down that
road, but like there had been I switched
off my medicine because I wanted to have
a little bit more emotional like a
storyline kind of I wanted to be able to
like kind of connect a little bit more
in some moments.
>> Um and I was having trouble having any
feelings because of uh antid-depressants.
antid-depressants. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> It was just hard. It's like you try to
get a feeling and it kind of stalls out.
It like gets stuck in the mud, you know? Mhm.
Mhm.
>> Um, so that was kind of one thing and
then like the government put out this
DHS video that made me really scared.
>> The the immigration video. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Talk about pulling that out of context.
They're so good at that. They just took
something that had nothing to do with
something else. You making a joke and
then they're like, "He's our
spokesperson." [laughter]
>> You're like, "What?
>> I didn't sign up for that,
>> bro." And so I just got so much like
hate stuff. I mean, a lot of it I didn't
see, but I would just see enough where
it was like, "Fuck, this is scary." And
that Charlie Kirk thing had happened not
I think a couple weeks before. And so I
started just getting real paranoid.
Yeah. You know, I started getting real
paranoid at home. I was paranoid about
the show like if there could be somebody
in the a, you know, like
>> Oh yeah.
>> It just like I think it made me really
scared to be honest with you.
>> Yeah. And um
yeah, so that was happening and then uh
there was just kind of too many cooks in
the kitchen on this set. And then during
it um yeah, I was just like I think my uh
uh
like I just had too. It was just it it
was all kind of too much to I think get
the show off as best as I could.
>> And so that's all I left there thinking
like I couldn't remember where the next
joke kind of went. Yeah, sure. Because
it's overwhelming. Yeah. I think people
don't know that. I think I've said that
a hundred times is like I I always quote
Dan Soder. Soder always goes like when
someone says, "Oh, I didn't like I I I
like Theo more this way than the special
or whatever or that." But it's because
like with this, you're getting it
straight from the tap. He's like,
"You're getting you're drinking out of
the hose like you're a kid." Like this
is drinking out of the hose in podcast
world and and internet world
>> and live standup.
>> Yeah. When you do when you do a taped
special, there's so many more elements
that go into it that people have no
idea. Dude, I was changing when I taped
this last one I did for Hulu.
>> White noise. Yeah,
>> white noise. I changed 10 different
things from the to the on the second to
last show
>> cuz I was tripping. I was freaking out.
I mean, and I Zack Townsen who who's
great comic who opens for me. Yeah. You
know, Zack from Nashville. Yeah.
>> He's great. And Zach was helping me kind
of rewrite some stuff to like tighten it
up and cut the fat and because I was
bummed about a few of the jokes that I
told that didn't hit the way they did
when I was touring and then it gets in
your head and then I'm sitting backstage
kind of having, you know, this moment of
like, do I just not do that joke? He was
like, "No, that's a great joke." But I
think it's hard to get that confidence
back when you you feel overwhelmed. They
don't really feel it as much as you do.
>> No, they don't know. And there should be
a meter that they see that lets you know [laughter]
[laughter]
>> how I feel about this right now.
And it just jumping up and down. Yeah.
And and they can honestly they could
tell you're like, "Look, I'm feeling
this is like a four and a half right
now. It was a six in De Moine, but now I
don't know."
>> But that's the worst when you get in
your head about cuz after the first one
you're like, "Now what do I change?"
Anytime you get to like the you're
standing at the finish line kind of and
you're like, "What do I adjust?" But
you've been around the whole track with
all these jokes.
>> Oh, dude.
>> It's hard. You know what? Sometimes it
feels like especially when a joke you
think was really good. You know how some
NFL players get in trouble because they
drop the ball before they cross the the
goal line? I feel like I was doing that
a little bit because I wasn't committing
to the joke because I was unsure of the
way that the, you know, a tag came in or
the the punchline snapped and then so I
started to doubt myself. But but that's
so natural cuz TVs are because TV
cameras are up. So your brain does a
thing that it doesn't do live. Live you
fly so free it doesn't matter. You know
what I mean? That's me. Yeah. Dropping
the ball before I get in the end zone.
But I did it on like two or three jokes
and then the last taping, Zach kind of
reinstilled some confidence in me and
was like, "Dude, just just cut it out."
>> That was nice of him to say that.
>> Yeah, he helped me out a lot. He helped
me out a lot. I I I like I think if you
don't have people with you in your in
your team of whether it's features or
hosts or friends or producers or
directors or whoever to kind of give you
that extra dude, you're good. You're
good. It gets hard. And sometimes
there's too many cooks. Sometimes you're
like, I know how to make this meal, man.
You got to leave me alone. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> But when you need it, you need it. I
think the more open we are to the
audiences about that, the better off it
is because the criticism is higher than
it's ever been for specials and for live
taping for tapings. I mean, and I think
when you come clean about what it is,
what affected you, and the reality of
it, the more loving they get around it
because this is it's a it's just a
difficult task to to film something,
you're trying to capture lightning in a
bottle, and the greats do it often
because they're the reason that Louis
does it so well cuz Louis the in my
opinion the greatest to ever do it.
Yeah. So, yeah, he captures lightning
very well. It's really hard. I'm trying.
I'm out there with a kite and a key,
>> but it's tough to get it, dude. It's
really hard. And we do the best that we
can delivering after we've already
toured this thing a ton. And sometimes
you overperfect it. You know, you want to
to
>> pinch this and change that and turn this
here and push this in front of this. And
then at some point, you have to let it
go. But I was concerned in the fact that
I, you know, you're one, you're my one
of my oldest friends in comedy and I
just wanted I wanted you to feel good
because I know how it feels sometimes.
When I did my half hour with Comedy
Central, dude, it was my childhood best
friend and my wife uh my girlfriend at
the time in the green room and I got off
stage and my best friend was like,
"Bro," and he came give me the biggest
hug and I, can you give me like two
minutes in the green room with her? Is
that okay? And he got out and I just
started balling. >> [laughter]
>> [laughter]
>> I thought I tanked.
>> No way.
>> I just felt the pressure and I let it
all go finally.
>> Oh, dude. Now that you said that, I
thought my first special after I did it,
I was like, I why did I choose to do it?
Like it was I thought do let's do it at
home. But people there had never seen
comedy. A lot of them there was a lot of
like LSU Tiger fans. There was like some
lady like yelling defense the whole
show. I'm not even joking, dude.
>> Cover two. Cover two in the middle of
your joke.
>> People had no idea how to act.
people were just yelling out like
tell the story you know just it was just
>> and it you know so that was a
hectic and I remember getting through
that and being like god this is a that
was a it was that was hell
>> it's it's hard but I like I wanted to
know you were good so when I hit you cuz
I wanted to know that everything was
okay and you know people have their own
opinions on the internet over what went
down which is like that video that
circulated of you talking to the fans
after the show
>> yeah that was crazy and I don't even
really remember it you know
>> yeah cuz you're you're you're running
hot at the end of a show. You're not
really paying attention to anything.
>> I think somebody had kept kind of
bothering me a little bit. I don't want
to say bother cuz people came to the
show, but someone was being aggressive.
Kept asking me for something like, "Will
you do will you do this? Can you do this
thing? Can you make me a video?" And I I
feel like I was like, "Look, lady, I'm
just trying to take my own life, okay?
It's been a tough couple of months or
whatever." You know, that's the only
place I can imagine that I would kind of
say something like that or if I would
just kind of said it flippantly or
something. But I was trying to think of
like what retort cuz it's not like I was
like, "Hey guys,
it's I'm just trying not to take my own
life. It's been a c It's been a tough
couple of months." It's not like I was
making a speech like that. Somebody But
yeah, we left out of there and we
thought like, "Oh everything's
good. I think we got it.
>> Um, let's wait and see in the edit." We
went out to some country bar. We had a
great time. Uh, Glenny Balls was there.
My buddy Aaron was there. Um, and then
we wake up in the morning and there was
just like a ton of online. Yeah.
>> And uh, and I was like, I just can't
even deal with all this. It made me
learn a lot about online. And I didn't
even look at it. Like I didn't even look
at any of that stuff. And I haven't
looked at any of the articles. One of
them popped up when I was scrolling. Um,
it was like the Obama's Netflix or
something which wasn't even true. It was
just like
>> uh, and there were moments during the
show was like, "Look guys, I'm just
having a tough time." You know, like I
remember I went out there on stage and
my mouth immediately got extremely dry
and I was like, "Oh man, something is wrong."
wrong."
>> Anxiety. You're you're you're excited
and nervous about doing something so
important to you. And
>> it it that hadn't happened this whole
time like, you know, and I was like, "I
can't go to my stool and get water right
now. I just walked on stage like they're
clapping. I [laughter] can't
take a break already." You know, like
>> they're like, "Didn't you get water
backstage, man?" You're like, "There's
no water back there, man. We keep it all
on the stool. Yeah, we [laughter] we
don't we don't got it back there,
brother. It's only on the stool.
>> Like the guy that shits when he gets
right to work, dude.
>> Right. The moment he walks in the door. [laughter]
[laughter]
>> I got to right away. That's what it
feels. I think it's I think it's an
overwhelming feeling that cannot be
articulated. I'm not smart enough to do
it, but I do know what that feels like
as a comic. But are you So, what are you
going to do now? You feel like you want
to take that?
>> I I literally Oh, yesterday they just
sent me another cut of like I gave them
some notes on a cut. They're sending me
another cut. It might be fine. So, we
had two good halves. Yeah.
>> So, I'm looking to see, but then also
like there's some I just wanted to have
a little bit more of a story to it,
which was the reason I was trying to
have a little bit more feeling and
emotion so I could kind of like have a
little bit more storyline in there um
about like growing up and life and a
little, you know, and maybe that's me
was I was trying to do too much. I don't
know. but um you start to realize that
these are kind of uh they're kind of
like photo albums for you know your time
and um or time you spent with this
material. I mean Neil Brennan said to me
right before the show he goes, "Hey man,
this will be the last time you maybe
ever do this material. So go out and
have a great time with it. Enjoy it. You
know, take your time with it. get the,
you know, these are things that have
brought you close to people and that
have brought people out and and and
hopefully sometimes made people laugh.
And so it was just like there was just a
lot going on, dude. There was and I was
just like there's just I think I was
just spreading myself too thin. I don't
know. It was just a lot of And I
just don't know if I landed it as well
as I would have liked to. Um but we had
to restart a couple times. There was
like a thing where I was like directing
in my head because I wasn't um getting
like certain information. I was like,
"Well, if the stool was here in the
first, when does it need to be there in
the second one? And where do I put it
when I move it?" Just little things like
that. And then they had like five extra
people there that didn't need to be
there. It was like they would radio and
it would just go to the person right
next to him. It was like we living in
[laughter] a
>> I almost thought it was a
somebody was playing a prank on me. And
then they uh I just gotten a security
guy. So this there's this guy
who was just I mean you could
put a co piece of coal in his hand in
the morning and you'd have a
>> diamond when it comes out.
>> Or you'd have a piece of coal
that looked like it had a grill on it.
[laughter] You know what I'm saying? At
least by the afternoon like a
tough guy. And uh he'd been like
stopping some of my friends. I just
didn't Everything was just kind of like
a lot.
>> Would you Where'd you find this guy? By
the way, I'm always fascinated with
security guards.
>> Um, we found a guy, somebody in
Nashville set us up with a guy that was there,
there,
>> like a military, ex-military,
>> I think. So, maybe cop, fire department,
FBI, undercover cop,
>> local mall security,
>> high school, narc.
>> I'm just going to get a guy that did ROC
in college. I don't even want [laughter]
>> That's what I want. I want a guy that
did ROC with that wooden gun [laughter]
and uses test 200. That's what I want.
>> Yeah. My [snorts] college roommate, my
freshman year, my buddy Evan, he did
ROTC and he got kicked out. You know how
hard that is? It's impossible. They need
you in there. They were like, "Brother,
you're not running in the morning.
You're you're out. You got to go."
[laughter] And he just, dude, he
couldn't wake up. He didn't do the
exercises. And they were like, "You're out."
out."
>> And we've almost never kicked anybody
out of Arizona State, ROC. He was like, [laughter]
[laughter]
>> "They're begging for people." Shout out
to Ev. The only guy I know that could
get asked to leave ROC. He was like,
"I'm just committed." I was like, "I
don't think so." There he is spinning
guns. [laughter] yeah, dude. Well,
the crazy is you can tell when an RTC
guy's in the military cuz the rest of
the guys like lined up firing at the
enemy and this guy's just
[laughter] whipping his
He's just flipping his
[laughter] and buying Camaros online,
dude. All the ROC guys.
>> Camaros are Mustangs. The Camaros are
Mustangs. They got to be It's either a
Camaro or it's a 5.0, baby.
>> Oh, dude. All the ROC guys in our high
school, all they would do was buy these
cars. Super like they would buy
sometimes. It would if they could, could
it be a nice Camaro, but every now and
then some guy would like get jealous of
the guy that had a nice Camaro and he
would get like a piece of and just
put like a $2,000 engine in that
and [laughter] it would just
You know that car when you were
a kid? If you backed it up, you put it
on the ground and backed it up, it like
built up energy.
>> You had to go forward. Yeah. It had like
a wind up. Yeah.
>> And then it would just [laughter]
go as fast and just right off.
Never straight. That was that
[laughter] dude, bro.
>> That was just a piece of They look
like a like a recycling bin
going at 200 miles an hour. And then
they would write the 40 time on the
windshield and it was like clutch
that they would do. And they would put
all these like snipers never dying
tattoos on their arms and they were just
in ROC. [laughter]
>> Yeah, dude. They got dreams. That's
going to be my security.
>> That's true. That's exactly.
>> And so that was all scary. And then even
just having a security I mean every it
was just like dude there was so much
I was just dealing with like a
lot of like um I started to get kind of
paranoid. I mean there was people after
that Charlie Kirk thing texting each
other like you know stay safe you know. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> So there was just a ton of going
into it. But we left out of there that
night had a blast dude
>> you know and uh and thought that we
might have it. we'll just look at the
tape and then um yeah then the media
just like you know them you know
but not it but it's like them
they just you just realize that they're
bottom feeders these websites that
create these things and you're like oh
it's so sad
>> that's what they need I think that's how
they make their money now and the way
that we changed and the way that
podcasting kind of changed uh daily
current media you know they kind of
copied us but they took the worst
version of it where there's way more
love coming out of you and this then
they give credit for. So they're going
to appeal what they want to be the best
story. The best story is never going to
be Theo was surrounded by friends and
family having a good night. It's going
to be the opposite.
>> You know, nobody wants to read that. No
one wants to read Great Time with Theo
and his friends at the Country Bar with
Glenny Balls. Nobody wants to read that.
That's a I mean,
>> that's the unfortunate truth. They want
to read the other thing. They want to
hear the the drama, you know? They want
the other the other version that makes
them feel a little bit more interested
and peaked. And that's a bummer.
>> And we all do. That's the part of I even
notice like like with myself, it's like
I need to not like what do I give my
attention to? You know, when I see
things that it's like, oh, this couple
split up or this sort of thing. I don't
want to give my attention to that cuz
I'm just adding to that thing of like,
let me let me add energy into this or
look who got busted or just, you know,
like that. It's like I'm just kind
of giving some energy into that. Um, if
it's super negative, you know? Yeah,
wash that all away. I think the only
thing you can do now, even when there's
a lot of negativity,
not, you know, whatever, in the in the
public sphere, in the comedy sphere, and
the whatever it is, I think, you know, I
focus on drinking coffee and throwing
the ball with my dog every morning.
>> It was like my favorite thing to do in
the world. I did that here. I was late
because of that. >> Oh,
>> Oh,
>> I have I I drink a whole pot of coffee
in the morning and I play with the dog
and that's my like reset. I don't know
because there's no there's nothing going
on when that's going on. I leave my
phone at the house and I just go for a
walk and then go play with her in the backyard.
backyard.
>> Oh, we have a backyard.
>> Yeah, we got we got a little tiny little
backyard. In LA, you don't get much, but
you know, it's fake grass, too, which
is, you know what I mean? >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> I'm not taking care of grass, bro.
>> Well, and some of this new grass, it's
crab grass or it's that uh it's that
Chinese stalking grass or whatever it's called.
called.
>> That's Bobby Lee's grass. The Chinese
stalking grass.
>> I don't know.
>> That's what he calls it.
>> Chinese stalking grass. most likely
refers to Chinese silver grass, a
species also known as Japanese stilt grass.
grass.
>> The Japanese stilt grass is much more
patient and kind for some reason.
>> Yeah. Yeah, [laughter] dude. Yeah,
>> there [snorts] it is. Yeah,
>> I can't I can't take care of a lawn. You
got land, don't you have land up by you?
no, dude.
>> No, you don't have any land. [laughter]
>> I don't have any
>> I thought you'd have land out by you, dude.
dude.
>> I'm looking right now to try to just get
a little bit more space, but some places
it's tough. And one place I'm looking
at, it's kind of over by the inter. just
a little close to the interstate so it's
loud in the yard.
>> You don't want that. Get away from there.
there.
>> Like you have to yell if you're like if
you're at the, you know, talking to
somebody if you're like doing like
>> you really got to use your outside
voices at a barbecue.
>> Yeah. Yeah.
>> So, it's a lot of that, man. You know,
um so I don't know. I'm looking and it's
kind of tough, you know, cuz I do like
to be able to uh podcast from home, that
sort of thing. And and uh
>> and and
yeah, so it's been a journey. And then
it's like, you know, sometimes it's like
I it's like, [snorts]
you know, do I get a house where if I
have a family then we can live, you
know, it's like I start to, you know,
you get caught in that space where it's
like or do I just get a house for me,
but if I do that, am I like locking
myself into the, you know, it's like,
but then maybe some of that's just
overthinking things, you know?
>> Yeah. You've ever thought about doing a
compound with friends or family, people
come live with you? I mean, are you
clean? Is your house squeaky clean? >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Are you like a neat freak?
>> I mean, yeah, I'm pretty organized. I'm
not Yeah, my house is clean.
>> Yeah. I think I I think I'm like my dad
was um the son of a a a military man. So
shoes can't be out of place. Yeah. It's
that's like a I have the sickness. I'm
like just take put them put it right
there. Like my wife I'll be like why
those don't need to be there. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> She's like why do you care? I'm like I
don't know. It's a sickness, dude. It's
like just move them into the into the
other thing. I I think I've got that's
like my that's my uh my little OCD.
>> That's your Vietnam.
>> That's my Vietnam is where are your
shoes? Put your shoes over there. That's
my Vietnam. I have flashbacks.
>> Loose laces on the floor in mud. Dude,
move it. [laughter]
>> Oh, that's my foot Normandy, dude. It
really is.
>> And I'm Agent Orange, dude. So, you
know, I'm going to come down [laughter]
on it,
>> dude. I remember one time a a
van full of ginger people broke down on
our street and we'd never seen like a
vanful. They didn't have, you know, they
didn't have it at the time or whatever,
right? And
>> we weren't allowed in a van for a long
time. You know that, right? More than
five was a was a small ginger army. Uhuh.
Uhuh.
>> Yeah. You know, US government restricted
more than five redheads at once in a
moving vehicle, I think it was. Yeah.
You could be in packs outside because
we're controllable on foot, but in a
van, dude. [laughter]
>> Bro, we've never seen it. And I remember
my dad like four got out and he was
You could hear his
temperature rising, dude. You could hear
his neck straighten a little
like [clears throat] >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> What are you doing here, boys? >> Dude,
>> Dude,
>> keep it moving.
>> And then five and then six. They had one
that was like kind of weak or whatever
and he got out at the end.
>> We leave him in the back. Yeah, you got
to the smallest one must take up the
rear because he's got to protect from
the back and he's got to be one of the
first that could go. Yeah, Jinger's
traveling in packs is a dangerous
dangerous thing. You know, we don't
really see each other like that, you
know, like we don't
>> when I see another redeyed, there was a
redheaded girl yesterday working this
event that we were at and she was like,
"My brother." And I said, "Let's take it
easy because I don't know if you're an
enemy or a friend yet." You know, a
regular person I meet on the street,
hey, how you doing? Another redhead, I go,
go,
>> I'd like to see the resume first. Yeah.
before I let you into my space because I
don't know what kind of ginger they are.
There's different levels.
>> Really? Is there really?
>> Oh, big time.
>> It's almost like black people and that
albino guy or whatever.
>> You know that guy I'm talking about?
>> That undercover black guy. Bring that
guy up.
>> Yeah, that's got to be there's got to be
a vetting process. You know,
>> like can the albino black guy, does he
say the n-word?
>> Bring up a couple albiggas. [laughter]
Is that a term or not?
>> It is now, dude.
>> Can we say that or not?
>> Look at that black albino guy with red hair.
hair.
>> Oh, that's what the is up. >> [laughter]
>> [laughter]
>> Bro, that is the future, dude. Bro, take
my money, bro.
>> Whatever he's selling. And I don't know
if that's more me or more if he's more
red or more black. I don't know what
group he'd go with. I mean, he's invited
>> to the cookout and has to have ring
sunscreen, which is wild. [laughter]
>> Dude, that's Sunlight Jackson,
homie. Are you kidding me? Dude, are we
going to get in trouble for saying how
big? I feel like
>> I [laughter] don't know, bro. I don't
It's vague enough. There's my boy Blake
Griffin. He's a black He's a black
redheaded. He is,
>> but he's but he is but he's so handsome
and tall and athletic that he kind of
waines away from the ginger side. You
know, we're usually pale, see-through,
and frail,
>> right? He's able to kind of almost he's
above it because of his height.
>> Yeah. He's superseded it. Yeah.
>> He's gone above and beyond.
>> That's so rare in that community.
>> I mean, that is it. That is uh I mean,
that that guy still looks I mean 2,000
plus black albino person stock photos,
man. They took a lot of pictures of this guy,
guy,
>> dude. Is this Henry Rollins? >> [laughter]
>> [laughter]
>> I feel like that's Bro, this is
basically the albino Henry Rollins.
Dude, we're going to get in so much
trouble for making fun of these guys.
>> We're not making fun of him. I'm I'm
showing some love.
>> Yeah, you're right. Actually,
>> I'm fascinated when Look, you know
what's so funny is I'm That 100% is
Henry back to back. That's him. That's
his alter ego.
>> Yeah. Oh, Henry Rollins.
>> No, dude. I think uh when I find red in
other places, it's kind of it makes me
feel that we're still around cuz we're
fading fast. I mean, look, you can look
it up how many red they said redheads
were going to be dead by like 2045 or
something like that.
>> Bring up a batch of them.
>> Yeah, that's a that's close, dude. That
is a little too close for comfort for
me. I don't I don't want to be uh
extinct in the next, you know, 20 years.
I think redheads will be extinct 2060.
Okay, they bumped it up. So, we're
moving. Oh, it's a false claim. is
debunked. All right, good.
>> Widely been debunked by geneticists and
scientific organizations. But what do
the people think? You know,
>> it's more about the street.
>> In the early 2000s, the Oxford Hair
Foundation circulated a claim that
redheads would vanish in the future due
to recessive nature of the red hair gene.
gene.
>> It sounds like a wish more than a
thought. Yeah. Than a hope. I mean,
that's that red hair results from
mutations. Yeah. The mutant
>> MC1R gene.
>> For someone to have red hair, they must
inherit two copies of the variant gene,
one from each parent. Because this gene
is recessive, many people carry it
without having red hair themselves and
it can skip generations before
reappearing. Wow.
>> I'm a mutant and I never yet I've never
been booked on any Marvel stuff at all.
>> Dude, it's like a Agatha
Christie novel, dude. [laughter] This is
crazy, bro.
Um, it's amazing. In short, while red
hair will likely remain uncommon, it's
not going extinct ever. The gene will
continue to be passed down quietly
through generations, resurfacing
whenever two carriers have children.
It sounds like a >> romantic
>> romantic
>> like a romantic murder mystery novel. It
says it's quiet resurfacing whenever two
carriers have children. It will resurface.
resurface.
>> I love that. Well, it there is something
kind of powerful that it's so unique,
you know. Um and if you ever see
somebody that has blue eyes and red
hair, it definitely feels like they're
like I mean
>> Cheering on here, he's he's got blue
eyes and red hair, right?
>> Fresh off the tap. It feels like they're
right off the tap of like
>> they came out of this out of the factory
>> just Yeah. just like it feels like they
could have salmon swimming upstream in
their veins. They feel super clean.
>> Yeah, he's still he's still warm from
the He's still warm from being baked.
>> Look at that. He's still warm. See, I've
got brown eyes. I've got the Italian
side. Got the brown in my eyes. So, I
got brown and red. It is.
>> It's a dangerous mix.
>> Dangerous duo.
>> Um Yeah, dude. Relaxing is the thing now.
now.
>> Yeah, you got to you you're done
touring. No more. You're going to chill
for a little while.
>> Yeah. And [clears throat] it's so nice,
dude. I've been I've been going to
football games. I've been trying to like
plan a date and have and then I'm go on
the date like or do something like that. Um,
Um,
>> are you going on a lot of dates? Are you
dating right now or No,
>> I dude I just ran into the most
ridiculous thing. So, I'm in an
airplane, right? And the girl that was
working in the airplane was cute, right?
>> The flight attendant.
>> Yes. And I didn't want to like flirt
with it cuz it's her job. It's a small
space, right? M.
>> But I felt like she kind of like looked
at me like a little more than just
looking at I felt like we made like it
felt like a little bit of a spark when
we walked in. >> Sure.
>> Sure.
>> And um
>> did she know who you were?
>> I don't know.
>> Chances are high. >> Maybe.
>> Maybe. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> And she was pretty tall, too, so she
could see me because she, you know, tall
people can see a little bit more. So
anyway, I get on the plane, I sit down,
and then I'm like, and I don't see her.
She's like doing stuff and then after a
while I was like, "Well, I got to go uh
up there. I'm going to get a diet coat."
>> So, I go up there and while she's making
it, she's kind of going a little bit
slow and I was like, "Oh, I was kind of
talking to her and stuff."
>> And then, dude, I I dude, what a
idiot. I was like I was like [laughter]
[laughter]
I said, "Well, I said um you should come
to a comedy show sometime, you know?" Uh
I said, "I work as a comedian. um if
you'd ever want to come to a comedy show
because we'd had some good
conversations. She was asking me some
questions back and then she's like,
"Yeah, that sounds great. How how should
I get in touch with you or something or
or I was like, "I'll give you my email,
right?" And I was like, "Fuck, why
>> not a phone number? What are you doing?"
>> I didn't Well, first of all, I didn't
know if it's unprofessional to them on
their like I didn't know how much you
can hit on somebody on a plane. And it's
also a very small environment like if
something gets weird or they feel
threatened or something or it's, you
know, it's weird. It is a you're a
little too close for comfort. You can't
just walk away,
>> right? And we're right there. So,
anybody could kind of overhear like it's
a small environment, you know, and
everybody's quiet. So, I just What if
she's like, you don't do that. You just
don't know how people are going to react.
react.
>> That's true. But, I mean, if you were
feeling it, you were feeling it. If she
was obviously vibing with you, then you
throw her your email is the email
creates some separation where you go,
"This is my professional. If you want to
come to a show, email me. You and your
friends can come to the show."
>> Well, I didn't know if she has marriage
or whatever. And so, I was like, "Fuck,
I don't I just I don't know. I'm always
afraid, I think, if someone is like
married or has a boyfriend that I I
think that is like a big deterrent. And
it didn't seem like she did. She didn't
have a wedding ring on. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> And she could just say, "I guess I have
a boyfriend." But I think there's like I
have like a big I have like a lot of I
guess like fear around that part. And so
>> yeah, I don't know, dude. But this is
the worst part. So she's like I
was like, "Well, just do you have a
panic tomorrow? I'll just write it on a
napkin at my seat or something." It was
we'd been up there for a while and some
Asian woman, right, was at the
bath. She's banging on the
bathroom door now and nobody's in there.
And I was like, "Nobody's in there." And
she couldn't put it all
together, right? She couldn't. So, she's
still just standing there waiting. And I
was like, "Fuck, dude." And now she's
right, this Asian lady's like right up
against me. And you know, she's going to
go in there and make a soup or
whatever. Those [laughter] You
get a good Chinese person, they'll
make a soup in a
>> They close off the sink.
Bro, they'll [laughter] whip up a
a little bok choy
back chowder [laughter]
in an airplane sink in 20 minutes, dude. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> You know, Chinese people, you die
walking next to a Chinese friend, they
put a pot right there, light,
they make a soup out of anything. They
don't give a dude. They make soup
immediately and they keep it moving. So,
I'm like, this is trying to get in
there to cook,
>> you know?
>> That's why she was so anxious,
>> for sure. So, I'm trying to get this
lady's email. I'm like, and the pin
wasn't working good, dude. And now a
line is building up for a bathroom
that's open, right? So it's like in this
Asian lady, she's wearing like
three visors, glasses. She was
so Asian. She wasn't even there.
Probably she probably wasn't even under
all the stuff, [laughter]
>> you know? She probably you probably had
to order her online if you actually
wanted her to be there, dude. But all
the accutrants and were right
there. So, I'm trying to write the email
and the pen isn't working good and I'm
having to write it against like, you
know, the plastic in an airplane. It's
kind of like it's not the best writing
surface if you're writing against the wall
wall
>> that's up by the bathrooms. It's And so,
>> probably textured too. You probably It's
probably bumpy and textured.
>> It was just a lot. So, I finally got
like four letters of the email,
but like I kept trying to like etch it
into the paper so you could see it if
you put it by a light or whatever. [clears throat]
[clears throat] I
I
The time has gotten too long. It's so
weird. like, "Hi, hurry up." This lady's
just beating on a door.
I think the door's even open by now
[laughter] and she can't figure out that
she can just go in there
>> and start a buns and burn her under the
[laughter] sink, right?
>> Light it up, man. Get it moving.
>> So, I finally give the lady the email
and it has like four letters on
it. It's a
>> I just went sat down.
>> Sat down. That's it. Oh my god.
>> It was too hot. The the the space had
gotten too hot. What a boo.
>> No, it's fine. No, not a loser. You get
to keep swinging. That's the best part.
>> What? But imagine this. Okay, so this
guy came on the airplane. He
gave me a half of email address.
I should have just left my fingerprints
on her back a little bit or [laughter]
something. Or just you know,
she was very fair. I should have just
written it into her arm with my fingers.
>> Maybe you leave half the email to see
how creative she is. Can you figure out
the rest?
>> Give her just like give a girl four
digits instead of seven. See if she can
figure it out.
>> And then I was just sitting there like,
dear God, what a loser. And
there's a long flight left, too. [sighs]
>> Who gives somebody their email?
>> Well, yeah. I mean, you know, maybe
maybe she found it creative and cute.
Maybe it was [laughter] cute. If she
really wanted to hit you up, she could
find you. You're findable, dude.
>> I know, but it just kind of broke my
heart. Or it didn't break my heart, but
it was just like, dude, what
just what are you doing?
>> Just give it to her.
>> You're like the guy that runs to third
base and then just goes everyone and
wants to tell the pitch or something for
no reason. Like, you know, it's like [laughter]
[laughter]
just go home. Fly. Get to home plate.
plate.
>> It's open. It was wide open.
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Um, so anyway, man, that was exciting,
dude. Uh,
>> and now you're just gonna take some time.
time.
>> But yeah, I'm taking some time, dude.
Yeah. Well, it's just nice. It's like
the first time where I haven't had like
something looming that feels like a lot.
>> Yeah, that's good.
>> You know, that's that that that getting
out there and touring can feel like a
lot, dude. You're doing You have your
You have the new golf show.
>> Yeah, my golf show. And then I'm which
I'm coming to a close in this year.
We're finishing this season and then
finally I get kind of like an open space
to just do dates on the road. I'm doing
a bunch of like new work a new hour and
working out in clubs again. I wanted to
go backwards and work in some fun little
smaller rooms like I'm doing Punch and
San Francisco and Tempe Improv and
>> I just wanted to like do a bunch of like
little clubs and then casinos to just
kind of like really feel it again
>> because I had toured so hard that I was
like I kind of want to feel it again and
go back out in the new year. So, I'm
doing a couple of clubs here before the
end of the year and then casinos in the
new year to try to feel it out again and
jump around the country. Honestly, a lot
of it too is so I can go see people
again, you know, go to a casino one
night and then go see a friend and, you
know, go back to New York and all that
stuff. Kind of jump around.
>> Yeah. One day I would like to have a um
maybe if I um get married or get in a
relationship then I would travel with my
wife and go like in a camp or something
before we start a family and maybe do
some shows but also just go see a lot of
places because yeah you miss out on some
places and and it is nice to be able to
schedule a place around like where
friends are.
>> You know who does that? Well, I mean I
don't know if he does it anymore but I I
ran into uh Rean was with his girlfriend
or I don't I don't quite know the I
don't know. I'm being
>> Brian Rean. Yeah, Regan's girlfriend or
whatever partner or whatever. And they
were on a a bus together and he was
like, "We're just touring the country,
doing shows, goofing around, stopping at
places that we feel like stopping." I
was like, "That is the move." My wife
just doesn't really want to go to all
these places cuz she's got her own
thing. You know what I mean? She's got
her own career, so it's hard for me to
pull her out. But it does seem like a
cool little fantasy to get in the bus
and stop by cool spots. You know,
that I never get to see because we're on
the road half of the time. You're in a
city and then you got to go and then
you're in a new city and you're like,
"Oh, that'd be we got to go. you got a
jet so much, you know, but also after
living on a bus with Bobby for a couple
of months. Um,
>> yeah. What was that? You were on the bus
with him.
>> Yeah, we did the bus tour last year. It
was uh it was really hard. It was really hard.
hard.
>> What are some of the toughest parts
about um living on a bus with Bobby?
>> I mean, you know, the number one rule
when you're on a tour bus is no pooping
on the bus. You got to wait to poop. I
mean, and you can schedule it. You make
you make an internal agreement saying,
you know, to yourself, we will poop when
we get to a place. And he pooped on the
bus within the first week. I mean, he
broke the rule within week one. You
know, you can't poop on the bus week one.
one.
>> How many weeks was the tour?
>> It was like three months.
>> Oh my [laughter] god, dude. He broke
rule week one and then his schedule is crazy.
crazy.
>> And his legs don't even dude, I actually
walked in and in the bathroom one time.
His legs aren't on the floor while he
poops. And I feel like it's so much
harder to poop when you can't get
traction from the floor.
>> No grip. Yeah, he has no He's not
grounded at all. Well, we put a Squatty
Potty under there. So, his feet do touch something.
something.
>> That's for him to feel regulated.
>> Cuz I walked in one time, he was
literally squeezing his body down like a
tube of toothpaste trying to get it out
of him.
>> You have to roll it now with him. If you
don't roll down with him, he gravity
doesn't do all the work for him, you
know, cuz Koreans keep most of it up and
high. So, you got to really kind of
massage him. A lot of times I'll massage
his shoulders and back. If he says, "I
got to go to the bathroom," I'll say,
"Well, give me an hour with you first."
So, I'll roll down his back, roll his
sides out. You know, you have to you you
really have to.
>> Oh, he's like a felo dough, brother.
He's like a [laughter]
>> He's a very rare dough. Look at him.
>> He is. And you got to let him rest. Now
he's getting skinnier though, man. He
doesn't look like that anymore. He's on
OMIC and he's flying free.
>> No, he's not.
>> He's on WGO, which is the alternative
cuz he threw up on Ozmpic pretty bad. He
was sick as a dog. Every time we went
out to eat, he'd get sick and then he
was like, I think I can't do it. >> Oh.
>> Oh.
>> So then he switched up and then he
started taking Waggoi, which is like
another alternative. And he's been
incredible. I think he lost He'll tell
he'll say the real number, but I think
it was 30 something pounds. But look at
how thin he looks there, man.
>> Oh my god.
>> Look how thin he looks there. That's crazy.
crazy.
>> He looks great.
>> He's He's feeling much better. He's
still looking for love, though. His
whole journey is now.
>> He's looking for love.
>> You can't look too hard.
>> He's searching, bro.
>> You can't look too hard, man.
>> He's staring deep, deep into that abyss
of the dating pool. And also the apps.
You're not on the apps.
>> I'm not on the apps.
>> Yeah. He He lives and dies by those
things. He loves them.
>> He does. Uh, yeah, but he doesn't commit.
commit.
>> Did you ever do the apps when you were dating?
dating?
>> No, man. That's that world seems so dark
to me. Also, I see all my friends
following the same traps where they hit
up a girl, they talk for a second, then
they never meet up or they never link.
It ends in a weird like blank space. It
there's no
there there there's truly no like
riskreward. It's almost like
>> Yeah, dude.
>> It's it it doesn't matter if it happens
or not. So, there's no like if you
schedule a real date, you meet someone
in the real world, the girl on the
plane. Risk. Real risk. You're on a
plane. Here's my number or my email.
Does it work? We'll see. On the app, it
doesn't matter, [laughter] bro. On the
app, it's they stop. He talks to a bunch
of girls, then he stops talking to him
when they he feels like they're not
engaged or he's over it,
>> dude. Yeah. I remember I was on the app
one time years ago, and it was when
Stephen Avery was popping off,
>> the guy that was killing people at that
used car lot or whatever.
>> And uh and all my pictures were of him. Yeah.
Yeah.
>> And remember that one kid? Yeah, that
was definitely one of them. And remember
and Brendan Dassy who was like his
>> Dassy was his nephew or something or
what was that? Right.
>> And they were both I think or
whatever and they
>> I don't know if that's it. I think they
were both just uh uh back in the day we
just quiet men.
>> They were just quiet men.
>> Brent Dassy was a misunderstood quiet
boy. Now I don't really know the I don't
remember this case in whole. My buddies
played Dassy on um
>> on NFL 2K. Oh yeah,
>> Dassy's the unlock a player.
>> He's got his screen name or something.
>> Oh, [laughter] I thought you meant he
had an he had like an avatar. You could
play as Dassy.
I played NBA 2K with Dassy.
>> He's just standing by a burn
[laughter] barrel just
smoking a dart with his buddies, dude. [laughter]
[laughter]
He doesn't even know. He's cooking
wieners. Like there's like a deceased
body and he doesn't even know. Oh, he
just thinks it's a open fire. He's just
>> He's always in the goolog. He's He's
lives in the goolog, bro.
>> He's just cooking Franks on a stick over
a burning body. He doesn't even know.
But anyway, I put a lot of Brennan
Dassie photos on there and a lot of
Stephen Ary photos because I was like,
"Oh, this is topical right now. Chicks
will see this." A lot of chicks love crime.
crime.
>> They love crime stuff.
>> Yeah. And then I put um the the cousin
from Home Alone. Remember that kid with
the glasses?
>> Yeah. I loved him. Fuller. >> Yes.
>> Yes.
>> You're going to wet the bed, Fuller. You
know who that was, right? You know what
actor that was? Uh-uh.
>> That's that's that's um McCaulay
Kilkin's brother. That's that's the kid
from Succession. >> No.
>> No.
>> Yeah. What's his name? Why can't I think
of his name? What's wrong?
>> Kieran Kulkin.
>> Kieran Kulkin. That's him as a kid. >> Wow.
>> Wow.
>> You're going to wet the bed, Fuller.
>> Yeah, dude. I put a picture of him and
then two pictures of me. And they got so
pissed at me. Like, you can't put
accused killers, whatever. And I was
like, get guys.
>> Well, you're just you're just talking
about what's going on right now. That's
what's happening in the news right now.
>> So, they had like some or whatever.
But anyway, that was the last time I was
on, I think. So that was probably about
nine years ago. I think also like I just
don't want to be addicted to that stuff
and I don't want to get to like the part
where you don't get a response from
somebody or you don't get something and
it makes me feel bad, you know?
>> You feel like it's a shot at you or something,
something,
>> right? I think I'm too s I'm a little
too sensitive with that And I also
don't like somebody being able to tell
me no if I'm not right there. You know
what I'm saying?
>> Yeah. It's easy. Give it to my face, >> right?
>> right?
>> Yeah. Know me to my face.
>> Yeah. Email me and tell me no. [laughter]
[laughter]
>> Okay. I hope that flight attendant,
wherever she is, I hope she's watching.
And you got to reach out to Theo. Take
him out on a date. What's your perfect
date? What is What's Theo's perfect date?
date?
>> Oh, that's a nice question. You know
what it is, dude? I realize it's just
like going for a walk somewhere.
>> Something easy.
>> Like just through like a nice nature
trail or something like that, [laughter]
which sounds like a
Which sounds very much like a
>> like you're gonna create a murder
mystery then. Yeah. >> [laughter]
>> [laughter]
>> Well, dude, did you see this thing with
Dax Shepard and uh um Kristen Bell the
the um she did like a post about their
anniversary 12 years or something like that.
that.
>> And she wrote on her Instagram.
>> Yeah. That where he's hugging her there,
which by the way, I thought it was like
I thought he was hugging his daughter.
It looks like a child.
>> That's his
>> that's that's her. And it says 12th
wedding anniversary to the man who once
said to me, "I would never kill you." A
lot of men have killed their wives at a
certain point. Even though I'm heavily
incentivized to kill you, I never would. >> A
>> A
>> and then a bunch of people were like,
"This is not healthy." She's just She's
goofing. She's just playing around. Look
at that. Look. Wait, wait. Dayline NBC
wrote screenshotted. >> What?
>> What?
>> Like they want to use it for something
in the future in case uh something goes down.
down.
>> I don't know.
>> She's just being played. She's just
goofing around.
>> Women I think one reason why women like
true crime and like murder or
>> murder mystery. Yeah.
>> Yeah. is because at least the man's
committing. At least if this guy's going
to kill me,
>> he's going to go all the way.
>> And it's commitment,
>> right? That's why that's why they like
it. [laughter]
>> Women want commitment. So, it's like,
"Oh, this guy is at least willing to
actually kill me instead of some
ass guy who comes by and
just kind of stabs me and pokes me and
makes me get my nails and cter shaved up
and all this stuff just to waste my
time. At least this
decent man has come over here and
committed to crime and committed
to murder.
>> I I am fascinated with the idea that why
women like it so much. Like my wife, she
doesn't like it the way that I see like
a lot of women love murder mystery
because I think it affirms their belief
that any man could be a killer. Like
it's almost like verifying the fact that
they go, "Yeah, Theo's sweet, but could
be a killer." I mean, they I think they
think that about every single dude could
be a killer. For some reason, it's like
ingrained in their DNA. It's got to be
nature protective years of nature of
thinking like if the village is running
out of food. The got the the big
Neanderthalss are probably going to be
like, "We got to kill some of these
women. They're eating the we got to get
rid of them. We'll go find new women." I
mean, that's got to be some weird old
school, you know, human instinct like
the women are what? And also, don't
female like um don't the mantises, don't
they eat the guys after they have sex
with them? Isn't that what they do? Like
the praying mantis, I think they don't
they kill the man the moment that
they're done getting impregnated.
There's got to be bugs that do that like crazy.
crazy.
>> Bugs. There's people in Memphis
doing this How many animals uh
>> Yeah, sexual cannibalism. F female
praying mantises will do it. They'll eat
the male during or after mating. You got
to wait till I'm done. Don't eat me
while we're going at it. Unless it's
right after I bust.
>> Yeah. Right.
>> Take me now. Yeah. Or right when I'm
doing it. That would be hot. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Kill me right when I'm doing that. [laughter]
[laughter]
>> Dude, that's crazy.
Um, what other animals? I believe it's
male raccoons will eat
the the children of a female raccoon so
that she'll go right back into heat to
make want to make more children
>> so they can have sex again.
>> I'm lucky. I'm lucky that didn't happen
with me. You get a redhead baby, you're
like, I got to I got to kill just to get
another one. This is the one I want.
Male raccoons do do that.
>> Are known to sometimes kill and even eat
the young of females. And one main
reason is exactly that, to make the
female go into heat. Again, the behavior
is a form of infanticide and it serves
as an evolutionary purpose similar to
what's observed in lions and some
primate species. Wow.
>> God, that's wild. And female raccoons
can't become pregnant while nursing.
They must finish raising the litter
before entering uh I can't say that. est.
est.
>> When a male kills her kits, she will
return to estrus within days, allowing
him to sire his own offspring rather
than raising another male's.
>> Wow, that's insane.
>> Some Stephen King
>> I mean, that if that happened in human
society, it would be absolutely crazy.
>> Kill your own just so they get hot
again. That's like a Black Mirror
episode. You know what I mean? Like in
the future, you're like, we need to make
uh the perfect human. So, every time
they have a kid, if it's not exactly
what they want, like, you know, they're
doing now people, you can pick things.
They're they're engineering kids now.
You can pick the the specifics of your
kid. Like you want it to be a certain
height, category, you know, weight,
hair, eye color. Like we're getting into
we're playing God. Like we're playing
God. It's going to backfire tremendously
bad. Like sometimes I think
>> Shi Otani was made in a lab. You see
that dude, you're like, do you know a
lot of six, seven Japanese dudes?
>> 265. You're like, this dude was made in
a lab to be the greatest baseball player
of all time.
>> Where was he made?
>> What lab was he made?
>> I mean, look at the size of this man.
arguably the greatest baseball player I
think I've ever seen live. It blows my
mind. If you watch him live, you've seen
him live.
>> It's unbelievable.
>> It's shocking how good he is.
>> And he can't even tell us how much fun
he's having because he doesn't even
speak English.
>> That's why he does that, though. He
doesn't want you to know.
>> He stay He stays he stays he stays that
way. He's not trying to learn.
>> Soani was not made in a lab. He Yeah.
He's a real human born in Japan. He was
born in Mizawa Iwattate Prefecture known
as Oshu.
>> Yeah. Oshu. >> Wow.
>> Wow.
>> In Japan. We're both all athletes in his
youth. His mother played badminton. Oh,
that answers that. I guess bad mitten
players always make the best baseball
[laughter] player.
>> Bro, imagine how savage his mother is at.
at.
>> She's the baddest at bad. His
father was an amateur baseball player. I
did know that. But a factory worker for
the most part.
>> Oh, that's cool.
>> The rumors claiming he was created in
Japanese laboratory are satirical.
That's right. Humorous. That's what
we're doing here. We'll figure it out.
>> Joking around.
>> But dude, everything's getting
outsourced now, dude. Everything's, bro.
We're We're doing this new thing um with
Mike Row where we're gonna do um
>> Dirty Jobs. Mike Row. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> I love that guy.
>> Oh, he's great. His voice is great.
>> God, dude.
>> Dude, every time he talks, I can hear my
mother, which is [laughter] crazy. It's like
like
>> he gets women pregnant by the by the
baritone in his voice.
>> Maybe we need to get rid of that that
[laughter] statement. That didn't
>> That's crazy to say, right?
>> Keep it. No, I like it. Keep it. Okay.
It makes sense.
>> I don't think so. Let me give you my
email. [laughter]
>> Just give me half. Is Ro is Ro married married?
married?
>> I'm not sure
>> if he was a single guy. My good god. The
amount of women.
>> He's doing fine. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> Let me do some clean up. I mean, and
it's very like and it's very newsworthy
because he has inflection that jumps up
and down.
>> He worked um
>> No, he's he's single. He's never been
married. Been in some long terms, though.
though.
>> God, he worked on um on QVC whenever he
first started.
>> That's how he got it started. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> No And so we're doing this thing
where it's like uh it's like [snorts]
small American companies, like mom and
pop companies, like trying to create
like an avenue for them to sell
Christmas gifts to other people. So
we're going to do this episode that's
all about that
>> and feature uh a bunch of different products.
products.
>> It's kind of slicing out Amazon, so to
speak, right? You're like, take it back
to the local shops.
>> Yeah. Just so then it's almost like you
get two gifts. I get to get somebody a
gift, but also get to give another
person a gift
>> by having by buying something from them,
you know?
>> Yeah. like what Tom's shoes did kind of,
you know, where you buy a shoe, they
give a shoe to somebody. Yeah. I don't
even I don't know if that's true, but
>> Well, all these products are
Americanmade, so everything is like it's
purely Americanmade. But one of the
things we're noticing, dude, is like
there's nothing made here. >> No.
>> No.
>> Like, if we shut off China completely,
we would be living off of beef
jerky and
>> which I love
>> and wind chimes. Okay,
>> bro. And garden gnomes. We're still
producing those like crazy, bro. We
there. You go past the nursery down the
street, there's 100,000 of them. I'm
like, who's still buying these? But
they're still made here. And by the way,
uh the more I see companies that are
trying to do the made in the USA thing,
the prices go skyrocket. That's the
that's the worst part that you're like,
I want to support them, too. But my god.
>> Well, there's just no there's no
infrastructure. I mean, you can't get
hardly anything done here is what we're
seeing, right? But some of that's
starting to change. Like there's people
that want to do it. Um there's this Good
Ranchers company that is like uh
sourcing meat that's just in America.
There's um American Giant which has
finally created an avenue for like
getting cotton jinned here and that they
can use to create textiles and shirts
like but it's like electronics.
>> No, that's gone.
>> We lost that a long time ago. We were
never going to I mean but also they make
they make the best electronical
man. Like have you seen in Japan,
they've got those streets that have
kinetic energy that stores energy for
you walk on a you now when you walk down
some sidewalks in Japan. It stores
kinetic energy as you walk in the
sidewalks. Look at that. So you press
down and it takes the kinetic energy and
stores it for for energy usage in the future.
future.
>> Brother, there's a pothole on my street
that's been there for 9 years. We can't
get that fixed. And they
got kinetic energy sidewalks. I mean
>> Yeah. That's where Mike Row keeps his
voice in that pothole, dude. [laughter]
It's That thing's deep. I live
down here.
>> But dude, there's Yeah, they have a
sidewalk over there. They can tell if
you're a or not, too.
>> They really? Yeah. >> Damn.
>> Damn.
>> Isn't that crazy?
>> Japan is advanced. [laughter]
>> But dude, that's a scary day to take
your son for a walk, you know? Like, [laughter]
[laughter]
let's see what happens here, fella. They
took the idea of a what was it? What was
it when we were a kid? What was it
called? A uh There it is. That's the road.
road.
>> And that's us just painting.
>> That's me and you just walking around.
Now, if you come when you're on that
block, that's how they know.
>> Yeah. [laughter]
Then they got you. One of us.
>> That's for sure, dude. Bro, it's that.
Yeah, that's the kind of that's looking.
looking.
>> That's out of pocket.
>> But that's great though. That's that
rainbow street. But the craziest thing
was remember they put all that rainbow
and the black pride stuff right next to
each other. And meanwhile in Black
Ultra, they like do not accept the
>> That is not on the same block. They want
that. Yeah. They're like move that to
the other block.
>> Yeah. Like [laughter] put that in
the culdeac. You know,
>> that is a dead end. Put that
on the dead end, dude. Technology is
getting so crazy, man. Did you see the
um I gave her my email.
Could you even imagine?
>> Half an email is even worse.
>> But what? I tried as hard as I
could. She gave me the pen, dude. But uh
and then just sitting in my chair and
just being like, "Bro, why did you go up
there? You got to diet coke and give
woman half of a [laughter] email address.
address.
You are good." H. Um, no.
Speaking of technology, dude, there's a
there's a toilet. Bring up that toilet.
There's a toilet now. They want to be
able to
um is it film you while you're doing
poops or whatever?
>> Yep. They they film you while you're
>> or it's uh they want to be able to test
your poo poo or
>> Oh, I like that. Test me to see if I'm healthy.
healthy.
>> Yeah, but Dude, what if you just
had a night where you had a
couple, you know, you had a couple
barks, root beers, and some pizza,
>> right? It's gonna tell it's gonna let
you know how bad it was for you. That's
good. I want to know. I want to know.
>> And bro, can we discontinue hot honey
pizzas? Because those are making people.
>> Why is that a thing? I don't understand
honey on the pizza. They putting that
They always do that. They go pepperoni,
jalapeno, and hot honey. That's the new
I don't like that. I don't When
did honey make its way onto that?
>> It's just people that want to more.
There's people that can't
>> Coler makes a tiny camera in your toilet
to an analyze the contents.
>> Uh, some smart litter boxes can monitor
our pets habits and health. So having a
camera in our human toilet bowl seems inevitable.
inevitable.
>> No, it doesn't. I don't need a camera in
there. I don't want it to watch me.
[laughter] I don't want that stuff
posted. The caller's like, "Uploading
now to Facebook."
You're [laughter]
>> Ricky just
Ricky gets a four stars.
>> You see my little wiener barely making
it over my balls first thing in the
morning when I'm on Facebook.
My dad would post 100% on accident. He'd
be like, "Help me take this down. I
posted the colar clip."
>> Like, Andrew, what? Andrew, I posted the
caller clip. Please help me take
it down.
>> It was a thick piss. Damn it. [laughter]
Look, sometimes I pee sitting down.
They're They're calculating it
wrong. [laughter]
That would be my fear, dude. But it says
it right here. The 599 Decoda clamps
over the rim like a toilet bowl cleaner,
pointing an optical sensor at your erect
>> excretions and secretions.
>> Excretions and secretions. It then
analyzes the images to detect any blood
and reviews your gut health and
hydration status. Depending on the plan
you choose, the fee is between $70 and
$156 per year.
>> We need to go back to my grandfather who
never went to the doctor. He was like, I
don't I'll figure it out. It'll get me
when it gets me. My grandfather never
wanted to know like this is something
interesting. There's a couple of friends
of ours, not my liberty to say, that
went and got a full body test to make
sure they're okay. And one of our
friends came back with something who you
know and you know it scared him a little
bit but he got it taken care of. It was
benign so luckily it was okay but I got
the fear of he's like you should go do
it and I thought I don't know if I want
to know like do you want to know? I
think just let let it happen when it
happens. I don't want impending doom. I
just want to live life until it's over.
I think it's there's so much noise
stressing us out that more noise about
our existence. I don't really like this.
What's this comment that's coming at us
right now that I think might hit us or whatever.
whatever.
>> I don't want to know. Just let it hit
us. I don't tell me it's going to hit
us. I don't want to I don't want to know
it's it's going to happen because then
I'm preparing for it to happen. I'd
rather just keep living free until it happens.
happens.
>> But what if you're living free and your
neighbor's just digging a huge hole in
his yard to hide in?
>> Let him live then. That's that's his
choice. People build people build
bunkers. All people have been building
bunkers for how long? I mean, as far as
we know, the Denver airport is a is a
big bunker. I mean, and they've told us
for years, they're like, "No, no, that's
not true." And then the older you get,
the government goes back on what it
said. Remember when they said there was
no UFOs when we were kids? Like, there's
no UFOs. And then like a year
ago, they was like, "Yeah, there's
UFOs." Yeah, we got And we got a bunch
of them, too. We keep collecting them.
>> And they're in the water. There said
that. Remember that from
>> living in the water? Yeah. [laughter]
>> They're getting transferred. You've been
underground in New York. You're like,
"This is where they live for sure, dude.
It's Hidetic Jews in the underground
protecting the aliens. We got a
conspiracy theory. Dude,
>> remember the Hidic Jews? They busted him
in that tunnel in the underground.
underground.
>> And they never even
>> No, they wiped that away. They were
like, "We're never talking about that again."
again."
>> There's a dirty mattress and they never even
even
>> The secret synagogue. That's what it
was. That was the wildest I think
I've ever seen in my life. >> Yeah.
>> Yeah.
>> They busted him crawling out of those
sinks and then out of a sidewalk. Yeah.
The one that the dude is on the sidewalk
was probably the most like wild photo.
Oh, dude. Speaking of wild,
>> it was that sidewalk that judges you to
that knows it. So, it was like banker
extor [laughter] extortionist
>> right there. Yeah. Look, they got him
crawling out of a great insane, dude.
dude.
>> I know, dude. Look, the sidewalk is just
rattling off right there.
>> You You want to talk about a weird
photo, dude? Did you see this Time
magazine picture of Trump?
>> Did you see his response? It made me
laugh so hard. [clears throat]
>> They took a photo of him. They said, you
know, they put him on Time Magazine for
uh for the um hostages and they wrote
his triumph. You know,
>> that's a picture they used.
>> Well, look at his neck. Yeah, he
commented about it. He was like, "They
deleted my hair." [laughter]
>> I mean, you zoom in on that guy's neck.
It's banana. That is the worst photo
[laughter] I've ever seen, dude.
>> Oh, that neck. It's definitely It gives
long nut.
>> Yeah, that's long nut neck. That's long
nut neck. Honestly, he look I mean, look
what they they did with the sun in his
hair. [laughter]
He's like, "They deleted my hair. They
don't like my hair." I mean, it does
look photoshopped. It's hilarious. They
him on this. How Gaza heels. That
whole thing was just a a bunch of
of
>> You think they were going to give him
They like, this is why it's funny. Time
magazine wasn't going to praise him all
the way. Like, of course they were going
to put a bad photo. You think they were
going to give you the photo of your
choice? Come on. No way. By the
way, I think about that all the time
when I take photos with fans of how
stupid I look. And then when I
do die, they're going to use one of
these dumb photos of me like
half-cloed eyes looking the other way,
blurry, dumb-headed. Every time I take a
photo, I'm sure I look like a
idiot when I take one on the road. So
when people want photos now, I always
go, "Hey, man." They go, "Hey, can I get
a photo?" I go, "Yeah, can I can you can
I selfie it?" So I can just take it of
us. That way I know I'm like, "Hey, then
I know I know what I look like." Said
like a a fat dumb red They
deleted my hair. Oh, disappeared my
hair. That's what it was.
>> They disappeared my hair. They
disappeared my hair.
>> Dude, I'm hanging out. H I was with Kid
Rock the other night and he calls Trump,
dude. It's like
>> got him on speed dial.
>> It's like 1:00 a.m. He calls him. He's
like, "What's going?" Trump answers.
They're talking. I'm like,
"Dude, what is going on?"
>> How was his house, by the way?
>> It was awesome. Kid Rock's house is sick.
sick.
>> I've heard it's wild, right? It looks
like the White House. Is that true?
>> Sweet, dude. Bob's a nice guy, man. He's
uh he's like he's thoughtful. He's, you
know, he's Kid Rock, but he's also like,
you know, he's also complete animal.
animal.
>> Yeah, it looks like the White House,
right? Isn't that It's a dupe of the
White House.
>> Yeah, that's it right there. God, that's
bananas to me.
>> And you can see it from you can see it
from town if you're at a restaurant.
It's pretty cool.
>> It's perched up on the hill.
>> Yeah. Um
>> that's Nashville or where is that?
>> Yeah, that's in
>> dude. Last week we went to NBA Young Boy
which was dope. We went to I went and
watched Ella Langley play which was
awesome. Um and this kid Dylan Marlo.
Have you ever heard of him?
>> I don't think so. But I'm really bad
when it comes to that kind of stuff.
Like I that that group I was playing in
the hallway. I'm in love with them and I
forget their name.
>> Oh, Cameron Marlo. Sorry. Dylan Marlo is
great. I've watched him. But uh Cameron
Marlo, this guy.
>> Is this his brother? Are they related? No.
No. >> No.
>> No.
>> Oh, wow. Handsome dude.
>> Yeah. I didn't look at him like that, but
but
>> I am. I'm looking at him like that.
>> Yeah, him then.
>> I might I always I always figure half of
it's got to be talent, half's got to be
handsome. He's a handsome cat.
>> You know, he's I will say this now that
I think about it a little bit more,
which I'm not going to think about a
lot. He's a little bit handsome. But
>> he is,
>> bro. Sings like God. I mean, just like >> country.
>> country.
>> I don't even know. gospel, country, go.
It's just like it's a lot.
>> Phenomenal, though. And then we went and
saw your boy Dermit Kennedy the other
night. He's Irish.
>> Yeah. Yeah. One of my one of my own.
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