0:00 -beatboxing- Arin: Hey, I'm Grump!
0:01 Jon: I'm not so Grump!
0:02 Both: ♫ And we're the Game Grumps! ♫
0:05 Jon: Oh no...
0:06 Arin: What? Jon: Oh no!
0:08 -What are you talking-- -What is that on the screen?
0:10 -What is this blue menu?
0:12 -With the red stripe. -(chuckling)
0:14 I think we've done it!
0:15 -It kinda looks like an upside-down Sonic the Hedgehog...
0:18 Both: OH, NO-O-O-O-O!
0:21 Jon: We're playing Sonic the Hedgehog!
0:23 Also more collo-- (incoherent) colloquially known...
0:26 -(laughing)
0:27 -...as Sonic '06. -Oh, I didn't know the Colloquial Tribe
0:30 knew about Sonic the Hedgehog. -(both laughing)
0:32 (laughter continues)
0:34 -Shut your mouth...
0:35 This, uh... this is, uh, widely known as
0:37 one of the worst games ever made!
0:40 -Why is that?
0:41 -Um...
0:42 Well first of all... -Not WORST game.
0:44 No.
0:46 Okay, no-- -Ever.
0:47 -Okay, no, no, no--!
0:48 In its context... in its time era...
0:51 ...or whatever,
0:52 ...like, when it came out, and in the context that it came out,
0:54 -Okay. -It was just known as one of the worst games...
0:57 ...ever made. -So you just mean all things considered...?
0:59 -Yeah, all things considered-- -Like that it's a Sonic game... -Yeah.
1:02 I mean, look at it, it looks like... fucking Final Fantasy!
1:05 -Yeah! It looks like Final Fantasy at this exact moment.
1:09 -(laughing) -Fuck you! (laughs)
1:11 -All right...
1:12 Tell me I'm a love interest and then he can laugh. -If...
1:15 If Sonic walked in, right now...
1:17 I think it would be a bit jarring...
1:19 -(wheeze) -To my eyeballs!
1:22 Anyways, no. It came out as a reboot to Sonic the Hedgehog, right? -Like...
1:26 like the entire series?
1:27 -Yeah. -Like this was supposed to be the new first Sonic.
1:30 -Yeah, this is like a reboot. It's like...
1:32 -"Sonic the Hedgehog--" oh my God look at it -Can I--
1:33 Can I just say... -You wouldn't even know it was Sonic. -...on the back of the box, if somebody,
1:37 if-- if Barry could find a picture of this? -What?
1:40 -There's fuckin' Shadow the Hedgehog on like a motorcycle? -(laughing) Oh yeah, there is!
1:45 -I don't-- see, I never got this. It's like,
1:47 "Sonic Kart Racers", it's like, -Yeah.
1:48 -...okay, I get Sonic R,
1:49 Because they're fast right? -Yeah. -You're racing THEM.
1:53 But, why-- why would Sonic need to ride on a motorcycle?
1:55 There's no way it goes faster than he runs! -Yeah, I know. I don't know, it's silly. -You just want, it's-- it--
2:01 I guess it's like if you rode a Segway or something? It's like "You know, I'm just easy. I dunno, I'm just feeling lazy today."
2:07 (laughing)
2:08 -Dude, real talk?
2:09 -Yeah? -Some fuckin' motherfuckin' sexy-ass CG cutscenes we got here. -Yeah.
2:13 -She's like "Aaagh, oh, jeez..."
2:15 -I think better CGI was used in the French-animated...
2:21 ...Sonic Unleashed promotional video.
2:23 -Starring a cute ghost girl. -Don't look at me like that!
2:26 I think I've seen that. -She has a heart on her cheek. -Okay, no, um...
2:30 ...actually...
2:31 -She's really pale. -Oh, this is Dr. Eggman coming up here. -I mean, I'm not one to talk, but...
2:34 -This is motherfucking gross as shit?
2:36 -Yeah...
2:37 (laughing)
2:39 -Aw God, you can, like, see his wrinkles under-- -I know! -Euuugh!
2:42 -Yeah, it's like "Aagh, get it away!" -Uughh... -"AAGH, GET IT AWAY!"
2:45 Why do you have the-- th-- gold nipples, Dr. Eggman?
2:48 -(laughing)
2:49 -Now... -He has four gold nipples, too! -I know!
2:52 I guess he wants Chaos Emeralds, as usual.
2:54 Look at him! He's got a fuckin'... -Euggghh...
2:56 -...ballsack ass head!
2:57 -Euuuugh-- (laughing) It's like a shaved testicle.
3:00 -Fuggin' scrote-ass head. -"Scrote"!
3:03 -All right-- no, okay... -(gasp)
3:04 Scrotey! -(wheeze) Okay! -Oh no, what's this?
3:07 -I know it... -Oh, it's Saaaanerc!
3:09 -(a la Jaleel White) "That's no good!"
3:11 (both laughing)
3:14 Okay, anyway-- -"Don't do drugs, kids!" -Okay, I'm totally cool with, like,
3:18 I get, I get that like, I get that, like, innovat-- like, guns!
3:20 What is guns? Why are guns?!
3:22 Okay,
3:22 Look, like... I get innovating... on... on...
3:26 ...a game, right, I get that you want to iterate and then make it not the same as before,
3:30 but this is-- I was just actually having a conversation about this with somebody. It's-- it's like...
3:35 ...inconsistent...
3:36 ...in a way that seems like they did not mean for it to be inconsistent, this relates.
3:41 -From an artistic standpoint?
3:43 Okay, from a promotional standpoint it's like "Whatever, it's got Sonic in it, who fucking cares?"
3:47 They obviously made this game to sell...
3:49 They already have an audience-- if they made this game...
3:52 "Poopy Gun Magoo", it would never sell, so they made it Sonic.
3:55 -But I'm just saying like it's-- it's inconsistent in style and it doesn't make any sense. -Yeah, like,
3:59 artistically, if you're using a property, like, you should probably at least keep SOMETHING alive.
4:04 -Well, yeah, I mean like--
4:04 -A theme or a feel or something.
4:07 -The only thing that looked like "Sonic" there was Sonic. -Attitude.
4:09 -Why was that what they chose? -Yeah.
4:11 -It doesn't make sense. -It doesn't have any triangle trees, or...
4:14 -Okay, okay, hold on, hold on... -Sonicky grass, or...
4:20 -Oh, okay... -Look at the jump sound!
4:21 It's all realistic and then it's like -WHEW- and it's just this
4:23 game is so inconsistent!!
4:26 -It looks terrible now. Why would they make the cutscenes looks so good
4:29 and then it contrasts with this and it's like "euughh"...
4:32 -I dunno what I'm playing anymore!
4:34 This looks like PS2!
4:36 -Yeah, it looks like-- like fucking Sonic Adventure.
4:38 -Oh my God, it looks worse. -(Sonic voice) "Oh no!"
4:44 -(laughing) It's all like, boring, in like Cardboard Town! -I know!
4:48 -Yeah, look at her-- -(sarcastically) So epic! -(dull) "They got me..."
4:51 -(dull) "Take i-i-it! (groaning)" -Take this blue balls!
4:53 That's all-- hey,
4:54 he's gonna have blue balls for the rest of this game!!
4:56 -(llama having a stroke)
4:58 Well he's blue anyways, so... -Yeah, I dunno, yeah, I guess he already has blue balls. -Yeah.
5:01 -We were looking at echidnas today.
5:03 They drink juice out of their nose.
5:04 -And they have four penises.
5:06 -(chuckling) They do actually have four penises!
5:08 -Goddang... oh, it's ugly...
5:12 -Oh, it's ugly!
5:13 -Yeah, this is gross.
5:14 -Look, I can't... I can't make this myself...
5:17 ...but as a critic... -(laughing)
5:19 -I can be a little critical.
5:22 -Ahh, you can criticize something without being able to make it.
5:24 -It's bad.
5:25 It looks bad, it looks... bad!
5:28 This game looks bad, it looks like Sonic's glowing!
5:30 -Well that's what ev'rybuhdy 'xpects you to say, so why don't you say sum'n different?
5:33 Look at that... battlecruiser!
5:35 -Look at that green tree, just breaking the composition. -One-ass green tree!
5:38 -Look at that green tree. -It does actually break the composition quite a bit!
5:42 Oh by the way, the loading in this game is very quick.
5:44 -Oh, is it? -Oh, it's insanely quick.
5:46 -Oh, just like Sonic the Hedgehog!
5:48 -(laugh) Yeah, dude, it's such a mess! It's contrasts with, like...
5:53 you know when you make a game, you-- (sigh)
5:55 ...you gotta have, like, a vision, and...
5:59 a... -Are you saying-- -...cohesive feel!
6:01 -Are you saying this game is blind?
6:04 -What-- what did I...
6:04 say that makes you say that? -Because it has no vision.
6:06 -Okay, shut--!
6:07 Hey, at least the framerate's good.
6:08 -Oh yeah, look at that! -Oh my God, I can't control this fucker!!
6:12 (screams)
6:13 -(laughing)
6:14 -(screams)
6:15 Oh my God!
6:16 -Whoa, he has-- he gets, like, atomic rings around him when you do that. -Dude, hold on, hold on...
6:19 You have to, like, crawl-walk-- no, stop going faster!
6:23 What is this... -Oh, look at this guy!
6:24 -...fucking guy, he's just...! (laughing) -He's just hanging out!
6:26 -Oh my God.
6:28 Is-- this is the worst... this looks worse than, like, the background of a
6:31 Super Smash Bros. Melee stage.
6:33 -It looks like Virtua Cop.
6:36 -It looks like the Isle... Isle Delfino.
6:39 -Only... only bad?
6:40 -No, no, it looks like Delfino Isle... -It's-- it's on a--
6:42 It's on a superior console and yet... -Yeah.
6:44 Oh my God.
6:46 I've-- I've never-- okay, I've-- I don't think I made this clear:
6:48 I've never played this. I've always wanted to.
6:51 I was gonna do a JonTron on it but I never got around to it...
6:53 'cause I thought it was obvious. Like, everybody makes fun of this game. -It makes me wanna barf already.
6:57 -Oh my God, this is worse than I tho--
7:00 Do I have to talk to this--?
7:01 Of course you have to talk to him, you're Sonic! -But look, I, like--
7:04 -The first thing-- the first rule of Sonic...! -I can't get out of the corner!!
7:07 -Oh my God! Okay... okay!
7:09 -The first rule of Sonic: talk to everybody!
7:12 -He doesn't even have a voice! -(mumbling)
7:14 -Oh my God... -He looks like Dennis Hopper a little bit.
7:17 -Oh my-- he does! -(laughing)
7:19 -Oh my God, guys!
7:21 This is the worst thing I've ever fuckin' seen in my life!
7:24 "You can't get through here because construction!"
7:28 (sarcastic) Thanks, big-- thanks!
7:29 -Aw...
7:30 That's so much information that I needed. -Oh... my God...
7:32 -Go to the question! -Who...?
7:35 Sega, what happened?
7:37 -Don't ask Sega, they don't know.
7:41 "You may learn SOMETHING important." -Yeah, you MAY, that's like...
7:44 wishful thinking...
7:46 "I saw a fox with two tails over by the plaza? It seems he was looking for someone."
7:50 -Oh, okay.
7:51 -Is this supposed to be an adventure game?
7:52 -Can I just say...? -Oh look, it's Tails!
7:53 -Oh, hey!
7:55 Can I just say...?
7:56 I don't understand why game developers have not fucking figured out...
8:00 ...that having voice acting AND subtitles is the worst goddamn thing on the planet.
8:04 -They didn't have subtitles.
8:06 -Yeah, they do. They do right now!
8:07 -Oh.
8:08 Ah, well, it's just like being subtitled like a movie.
8:10 -No, it's bad!
8:11 -'Cause if it's subtitled like a movie, it's in a language you don't understand, so you just read it.
8:15 -I sometimes watch movies with subtitles.
8:17 -W-with the sound?
8:19 -Only if I-- only if it's in a situation where I can't hear the sound.
8:22 -Well, that makes sense. -Yeah.
8:23 -In this, it's like...
8:25 You read faster than you hear them talk.
8:26 -Yeah, it's annoying now. -It's like a... really, really
8:29 fucking weird paradigm.
8:30 -(in Tails voice) "Ha, ha, I'll do my best!"
8:32 -It makes me wanna vomit. -Yeah.
8:33 -Like, when I played Fallout 3, the default was... or, um, Fallout - New Vegas,
8:37 the default was both.
8:38 And the-- like, I just had to turn the fucking... the text off.
8:41 I just had to. -Yeah.
8:43 -Because you-- you just can't concentrate, when these people are telling you something
8:46 and you're, like, reading it, too... it's just like,
8:48 OOBOOBOOBOOBOO
8:48 -It's all this information going into your brain. -It's bad but it doesn't bother me THAT much.
8:51 -I can't stand it. I can't.
8:53 -I think it's better with it off.
8:55 You can turn it off, I'm not gonna 'cause I want you to be mad.
8:57 -Thanks. -This is Game Grumps, after all! -Thanks, pal.
8:59 -I just wanna, like, get to a part where I'm doing something...?
9:02 -Yeah that would be nice.
9:03 Oh yeah, this first episode is almost over. We never even... -Yeah, I know, it's one of those games. All right. Well,
9:07 This is-- we're gonna do a full playthrough of this shit. We're gonna beat this.
9:09 -Augh-- you-- (laughing)
9:11 You're gonna regret that-- saying that very soon! -Am I gonna regret that soon?
9:14 -If you haven't already!
9:16 -Are you SERIOUS?!
9:17 (both shouting)
9:20 AHMYGOD!!
9:21 -You can-- I think you can
9:22 (whoosh)
9:23 across those rings. (laughing) -Can you?
9:24 -Yeah, I think so.
9:26 -You can (whoosh)
9:27 -Like you-- you lock to rings somehow. -Oh my God... okay,
9:29 but honestly Sonic Colors and Sonic Generations were all right.
9:32 It's just this one and Unleashed that are just... that framerate! It's...
9:36 (groaning) -So jumpy.
9:38 Oh... my God. I clipped through the chair.
9:41 You just clip through the fucking... (wheezing)
9:43 -I don't think you clipped. I think you just-- -Ohhh my God!
9:46 The camera doesn't have any buffering or easing. It just follows where Sonic is... -No! No!
9:50 -Relative... -No! It-- he--
9:51 No, it clips through the chair!
9:53 You see that?
9:54 -No, you go over it. (incoherent) -No, you go over it, but you kind of clip it a little.
9:59 It doesn't matter, it's jumpy. -Go over it...
10:01 and then you move. -But in, like, one frame! -But that's not real clipping.
10:04 Clipping is when you go through something.
10:05 -What-the-fuck-ever,
10:06 I'm gonna HOOOGH over these coins.
10:08 SHIT
